To think I can go on benefits instead of returning to work?

[UniversalCreditOrNo]

NC for this.

Let me start off by saying this....up until
February last year, I have never not been in work. I got my first job at 13, was working full time and living alone at age 21 (before which I worked 25 hours a week alongside my studies) and it was only last year when I decided to go travelling that I ever found myself without employment. I got pregnant at the end of my travels, and here is where I find myself.

My daughter is now 6 months old. In 3 months time, I’m supposed to go back to work. How do people afford to do it? Childcare is £56 a day where I am. On my current minimum wage job that’s a take home of around £30 a week....before tax and NI.

My partner is on around £20k and I can rely on family for 1 day a week childcare. So here’s my AIBU. Can I go on benefits, instead of going back to work? Is that a thing people can do?!

I don’t know how it works. My area is universal credit....is there even such a category for this? It’s not jobseekers as I wouldn’t be looking for work, and it’s not like I’m signed off with illness or disability.

My partner is convinced we can because he doesn’t earn a lot and ‘this is precisely what the benefits system is for’. However....his mum is a serial benefits user....everything from being a stay at home single mum until her youngest was 15, until now where she’s signed off for an injury from 3 years ago she still claims is affecting her work ability All I can think of is the stigma behind choosing to go on benefits, but right now I can’t see another option.

@iamtinkabella If you are not claiming housing costs then that will almost certainly be the reason why your UC is lower than someone else's. Almost anyone with rent to pay will have housing costs in their UC.

I know someone who stacks shelves in a supermarket overnight during the week so he can be at home with his baby during the day whilst his wife works.

He works 9pm -5am three or four nights a week. She works 10am-4pm. He sleeps for three or four hours before she goes out and again when she comes back, plus naps whilst the baby does. They do have family help one or two days a week so he can get a longer sleep then.

They get a couple hours together as a family in the evening when she comes home before he goes out to work. The hourly rate is a bit better over night.

At the weekends he does bar/door work and also delivers pizzas so he can keep the same hours roughly.

It sounds really hard but he says it’s worth it. He is definitely very happy and healthy. When the baby is old enough to have funded hours he plans to go back offshore two weeks on, two weeks off so he can still spend a lot of time at home when he’s onshore.

@ferrier if i claimed housing costs i wouldnt be allowed to work PT.

But you wouldn’t be being home £30 a week.

Childcare is a JOINT cost. It’s not to be paid solely out of your wages

What I’m your situation has changed since you did a budget and did the sums before getting pregnant (to see how much everything would cost and whether you could afford to go ahead and have a child)?

I'm a single mum no one else here to pick up the slack, I've made it work by learning a practical trade along side my office job. 4 years ago I took a student loan and became qualified in dog grooming. I can work from home in the evenings after the office job or weekends ect. Currently renting space in a local salon one day a week but there's an option to be home based or mobile, I.book customers when I want them. Childcare is a killer but topping up my earnings has allowed me to do things I'd of never thought possible when with my husband. My child has had an amazing holiday to Lapland for example, I worked my ass off to do it but nothing is impossible
You may get help to train in something in which you can set up a small business with such as hairdressing, nails, whatever interests you. Don't just look at jobs think about the flexibility of being self employed too.

@iamtinkabella Childcare is a joint cost in the OP’s scenario, to which I was responding, “love.”

In your shoes, I would give up full time work and try and get some part time work to fit around your partners working hours. You might be entitled to working tax credits, child tax credits and help with childcare. You also have a degree. You should seriously consider studying part time for a masters degree which will give the most guarantee of a well paid job. You have 3 to 4 years before your child starts school, make the most of it, they are not little for long.

May I ask why you’re on minimum wage?

It may make sense to leave work for a short while to look after baby as well as get back into education. Otherwise your life will always be a struggle.

• But you wouldn’t be being home £30 a week.

Childcare is a JOINT cost. It’s not to be paid solely out of your wages confused*

Yes, but the household will only profit £30 per week.

If you go on uc they might give you something towards childcare costs but if I were you I would get a job with less hours there are loads of zero hour jobs bank staff etc where you can just work the one day a week you have free childcare

@iamtinkabella Are you on legacy benefits still (tax credits and housing benefit)? If so you may be better off on UC as it tends to reward workers more than legacy benefits. Try this calculator www.betteroffcalculator.co.uk/#/free to compare the two.
But take some advice if you do think you'd be better off on UC as once you've made the switch you can't move back.

Or is it that your eligible housing costs are less than £220ish per month so you're better off taking the extra work allowance(assuming you have children or LCW/RA) and not the housing? ... which seems unlikely but I'm used to rents in the south east.

@ferrier yes im on UC. Our council only provides UC now unfortunately. I think id be better off by around £150 if i claimed housing but i just couldnt only work one day a week. If i claimed housing it would mean id only be able to earn about £250 a month and i would go insane from not working!

And to those who picked up on me judging my MIL. Maybe it's just me, but I think there's a huge difference in going on benefits because you feel it's better for your child's wellbeing to be raised by their mother during those formative years (and ONLY those formative years....)....to just going on it until they're 15....well into their school years....because it's easier than going to work.

Can you not see you're assuming she just preferred to stay at home the same way most women on this thread see you preferring to stay at home? Maybe she, like you, thought children benefit from having their mother around but rather than only being up to the 'formative years', she believed the benefit extended all the way to teenage years. How you can judge this woman is laughable. Whatever the reasons the facts are the same, you're both capable of working and choosing not to. Just because your child is younger doesn't mean you're doing it for a noble cause and she's just lazy and work shy. If you're going to opt out of working then at least own up to it rather than putting yourself on some mothering high horse, when the rest of us have no choice but to leave our children with the 'strangers' or save if we want extended maternity leave.

Thankfully not everyone thinks in this way, or they'd be no benefits for those that really need it.

I’ve been judged for going back to work. Mostly by family. Because in their eyes I should be raising my children.

However the same family members (Fil) have said that I’m scrounging at the moment because I’m on mat leave and getting benefits (maternity pay) and if I stayed home I’d be taking advantage of dh.

Can’t win.

@iamtinkabella That's not something I've come across before and I've been working with UC since it went full service.

@ferrier Thats what ive always been told, sorry my mistake though its actually £287 per month you are allowed to earn if you claim housing.

I'm glad you found a solution. I know so many mums who work part time with top ups and it works really well for them.

As soon as I read the OP I thought, well she needs to become a childminder. For the next 4 years at least. Look after her own child and a couple of others and earn. If it's the obvious solution to me and many other posters, why isn't it obvious to the OP?

@DianaT1969 , seeing as the OP describes using regulated childcare as ‘leaving children with strangers’ then it would be pretty hypocritical for her to become a childminder just for convenience wouldn’t it?

Also, as a mum who used a cm I would not want anyone looking after my babies who wasn’t doing it because they genuinely wanted to. Someone purely wanting a way of earning without having to pay for their own childcare wouldn’t get any business from me

OP, I haven't read the whole thread, but would going to uni be an option? You sound like a hard working person, and a degree would up your employment potential, give a bit of financial support, unis usually provide childcare and occasional employment plus you'd graduate just as your DD goes to school?

OP has already said they’re a graduate

Plus you would be adding to your pension, NI and CV by working. Have a look at how difficult it is for women to get back into work after years at home with the baby.

Completely agree with this. However, you and your DP will likely be eligible for something from UC, especially in a high rent area.