To think I can go on benefits instead of returning to work?

[UniversalCreditOrNo]

NC for this.

Let me start off by saying this....up until
February last year, I have never not been in work. I got my first job at 13, was working full time and living alone at age 21 (before which I worked 25 hours a week alongside my studies) and it was only last year when I decided to go travelling that I ever found myself without employment. I got pregnant at the end of my travels, and here is where I find myself.

My daughter is now 6 months old. In 3 months time, I’m supposed to go back to work. How do people afford to do it? Childcare is £56 a day where I am. On my current minimum wage job that’s a take home of around £30 a week....before tax and NI.

My partner is on around £20k and I can rely on family for 1 day a week childcare. So here’s my AIBU. Can I go on benefits, instead of going back to work? Is that a thing people can do?!

I don’t know how it works. My area is universal credit....is there even such a category for this? It’s not jobseekers as I wouldn’t be looking for work, and it’s not like I’m signed off with illness or disability.

My partner is convinced we can because he doesn’t earn a lot and ‘this is precisely what the benefits system is for’. However....his mum is a serial benefits user....everything from being a stay at home single mum until her youngest was 15, until now where she’s signed off for an injury from 3 years ago she still claims is affecting her work ability All I can think of is the stigma behind choosing to go on benefits, but right now I can’t see another option.

yikes majority of people on here are horrible!

I don't think it's a good idea to stop work completely I must say, you will struggle to get back into it with a big gap like that!

Also you shouldn't lose your independence! I'm married and still would never stop work completely because you never know what the future holds!

Childcare is expensive - but it's only for a few years and it gets a bit cheaper once they turn 3!!

I don't have children yet, but in future when we hopefully do have a child my plan is to go back to work 3 days and Husband would work 4 days - that means we only need childcare 2 days a week which is still expensive, but should be manageable - even if its nearly all of one of our take home pay being spent on it, its worth it to stay in work!

It will just be a bit crap for a while with money, but it would be too if you weren't working!!

Poowillybumbum there is not enough higher level, better paid jobs and even the ones aimed at graduates and professionals are still lowly paid across the UK. Wage are not just stagnant but far lower than 10 and 15 years ago.

Education does not mean a better paid job and has not for many years. Lots of graduates with good degrees work minimum wage.

Also UC probably won't help the op that's what people frothing at the mouth wanted. UC rarely helps anyone, you are either not entitled or you are but the pittance paid keeps you down and in poverty anyway. Working parents going to bed hungry in 2019.

But that's what some people on this thread sound like they want. And I expect they will vote conservatives in December.

A lot of people commenting are very ill-informed of how universal credit works.

First of all if you are looking at cost to the government it would more than likely cost less in universal credit for you to stay at home than it would for you to work as the help with childcare would be higher. So it’s swings and roundabouts.

Second of all as your partner works you would have to find the whole first month of childcare upfront then it gets paid back in arrears ( very hard to do on a low income )

OP you would be entitled to help. It is not your fault the system is fucked! Some mums really want to work but it is just impossible! If you have a reasonably high income and a big pot of savings it would be a lot easier and life isn’t always that straightforward!!

@NC4this123 and you're really ill-informed about how childcare works because you don't get any government help until they're 2.

OP openly said she doesn't want to leave the baby which is why she doesn't want to work. It's not impossible, at all.

Also op you really attacked your dp mum, so accept the bile on this thread. You have the same kind of attitude.

You have no real idea why she didn't work as a single mum, not everyone is capable of work or could find it. And also you have no idea how injured she really is now. If she gets some benefits, I'd say she is pretty bad as for the last 5-8 years, it's been very hard to get help for illness and disability. The government wanted a 25% reduction when there is and was less than 2% false claim rate across the board with all benefits. So do the maths the other 23 plus% did not just stop being ill or stop having a disability. People have died because if this.

Also to all the mouth frothers about benefits, read about the billions that go unclaimed every year that people are entitles to, also that the vast proportion of benefit paid out is in pension form. These are the government's own statistics.

@AmIThough yes you do. Universal credit will pay up to 70%. Actually.

Answering a few questions before I leave this post for good.

Haven't fully read most replies due to the vipers attacking me early on, but thank you very much to those who offered constructive advice, support and understanding of my situation. I've actually honestly seen people who cheat the benefits system entirely treated with more respect on these boards....but that's Mumsnet for you eh!

• I'm on NMW now because after 15 years in London on a £35k job (and getting taxed to shit from it I might add....), I wanted to raise my family back home where jobs are few, wages are low, rents are high and council tax is the one of highest in the country. My particular skillset and work experience doesn't lend itself to rural life, so I ended up in an office job. My own fault entirely, I get that. I just wanted what I thought would be a better life for my child, now I'm certainly paying for it!

• My first job at 13 was on the family sheep farm....working morning, evening and weekends for £2.50 an hour.

• my house does not lend itself to setting up a child minder, far too small unfortunately! A good idea in theory though.

• yes I am a graduate....but unfortunately that seems to mean absolutely sod all around here. My friend with a PHD is working for not much more than I am for the same company...it really does suck!

I've used the online benefits calculator, and it looks like if I go back 2 days a week I could top up my earnings with UC to bring home what I'm essentially on now with SMP. This is what I'll be doing...so thank you very much to all those who suggested I check out what I'm entitled to before giving up work entirely.

Can you take a evening job maybe part time that doesn’t include you needing childcare. You might be able to two Or three Nights a week while husband looks after baby?

Then think long term, train in something or work up to something that isn’t minimum wage or flexible so you can afford childcare and work.

U CAN go on universal credit and I know Cos I'm in your position. Even with 20k salary u still can get help Cos it's over 30k that u might not get help so 20k is fine. Me and hubby were both working full time before the baby but on low income and we still got a bit of help. If u don't ask u do t get

At my universal credit meeting recently they told me I don't have to work until baby is 3 and in nursery but if I do they will pay 85% of my childcare fees. U would need to do a joint claim with hubby and they look at the overall situation so him working u being at home with baby how much rent is etc etc but I reckon u will get some help and there's nothing wrong with it. I also worked all my life until I had my baby so this is just a career break

Inbox me if u want

😂 Creasing at a PP who said ‘champagne lifestyle’. Her baby is bloody 6 months old for Christ’s sake! You shouldn’t be away from your baby for long periods of time until they’re at least 1yo IMO. They need their mothers. £20k would not reach far in my house with 2 adults and 2 kids under 5 and £300 extra a month in benefits would not make it much easier, especially if living somewhere like London. A ‘champagne lifestyle’ is more suited to describe those who earn 40-100k a year, after all they can afford champagne Half of you really aren’t living in the real world and it shows greatly

I stayed home with my youngest (I too have been working since I was 13 until I was 29/30) he's just turned 4, we were able to manage all the bills etc with DHs wage. I struggled to find work anyway because DH has a rotating 4 week shift pattern of days and nights so even night work wasn't feasible. Are you not eligible for the 30 hour funding where you are? If you're working more than 16 hours a week here and your partner is also working, we can get 30 hours preschool etc free. I am more than ready to go back to work and have an interview for a fab job in a few days for one that is flexible to work around school hours. If you can afford to manage on your DH/DPs wage and not need top up, by all means be a SAHM, but if you need to top up, then surely your only option is that you find a job that works around his job? If he works say 9-5, is there anything stopping you doing a couple of nights a week or an evening job, bars and restaurants may need people from say 6-11pm, you wouldn't need to pay childcare then as your partner would be able to do it. Or if he's Monday-Friday, find something that is weekends only. After DD1 and DD2, I just worked weekends and could comfortably do 24 hours a week over 2 days. It's hard when you pass like ships in the night, but needs must.

OP I think one of the reasons you are still "getting a slating" is, as a previous poster had pointed out, you're ignoring the constructive posts (get an evening job that means no childcare) and jumping on those congratulating your choices. Therefore the "slating" happens. PutBaby articulated it well.

Wha are your thoughts considering working evenings? Red Wigwam could be worth a look too. It's temporary flexible work that could fit around your circumstances.

And can I ask the posters suggesting becoming a childminder ... is it really that simple?! It's setting up a business with all the associated costs, you need a decent sized house, relish the thought of looking after and early educating other people's children and you need to be suitably qualified. I hear it suggested like it's the easiest business opportunity ever and you just need to be a mum looking for work to make a great one

Sorry, just seen your DC is 6 months so the 30 hours wouldn't apply yet.

@UniversalCreditOrNo your comment at 23:14 last night

I just don't want to leave my little girl with a total stranger all day and then be almost entirely out of pocket for the privilege. It seems so wrong.

Well - it reflects the reality for many.

Two things:

1. childcare costs are a family expense.
2. pick your childcare well and they will not be strangers. They will be people who care for your child almost as much as you do. Our childcare provider were amazing and became a sort of friend/family. Certainly part of my child's tribe!

WTAF?! Sorry OP I do not work my arse off so someone who has the made the lifestyle choice to 'go travelling' and then have a kid can suddenly decide that work isn't maintaining their lifestyle and that they should get benefits. The entitlement!

Think before you 'travel'. Think before you introduce yet another child into the world you can't afford to maintain.

As a PP said, they cannot work due to disability and are on the bones of their arse. They need benefits not you.

Ever thought about making the father of the child up his game and get a better job?

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz
Re childminder
This is what I did
You have to attend a course re childcare , ethics etc , practicality , culturally sensitive toys , etc etc and meet the standards for the property eg child locks , rails on stairs . Yes numbers can be limited depending on space and ages of children . You have to have inspections etc . It’s not a casual thing .. it is a proper job of course . It may not be for everyone but it worked well for me and I stayed off my career ( proffesional career break - going back to same post ) u TIL school age .
I didn’t earn vast amount but it made a huge difference .

🙄 at the 'not like these single mums on benefits' insinuation. I am a single mum and I work my knuckles to the bone in my career to pay for everything that my DC needs, and seemingly so that some other people like OP can consider staying at home and not working, to be with their precious children whilst my precious child is in child care. 👍

What is a 'rent married?'

misses point of thread.........

Get a job around your DH hours or just live off your household income of 20K if you’re able to work you should that is not what the benefits system is for and it’s attitudes like this that the benefit system is under huge strain and cannot help people who genuinely need it! Maybe go back to college and re train to allow yourself better job prospects and then you will be able to get help with childcare.

Ps you only get taxed 20% on 35k that’s pretty normal I think 45k is when the higher tax comes in so that’s nothing to shout about...

I haven’t read all comments here as it’s 10 pages.
Childcare is expensive. Have you looked at the child care tax free allowance? Both you and your partner should be able to claim which basically takes an amount out of your wages before you are taxed. This brings your taxable income lower so should see a bit of reduced tax being paid. This then converts to child care vouchers which goes straight to your nominated nursery. I get about £200 taken from my wages before tax each month

Thanks GoNorth, and I promise I wasn't being goady I'm genuinely curious. Your reply has all the detail I'd expect as actually, childminding is a career that shouldn't be too easy to start IYSWIM as we're talking about kids here! I think unless someone has that vocation of looking after kids inside them they shouldn't just start up as a childminder! Of course I realise that for many people who have this "calling" then this point in their life could be the perfect chance to start childminding and it solves the nursery dilemma. And in fact it works brilliantly for all concerned.

Aware that what I just typed doesn't really sum up why I'm so uncomfortable with the casual suggestion of
Mum needing work that will solve her childcare problem = become a childminder.

Are you factoring in tax free childcare which will take 20% off the nursery fees?

Do you want to go back to work? I work part time and don't take home all that much money once we factor in childcare costs, but I need to work to keep me sane, use my brain and be around adults for a few days a week. I'm also paying into a pension through work which is important. So I don't look at it just on how much money I take home each month.

If you don't actually want to work then that will obviously influence your decision and you'll have to look at whether you can live off one salary. But I would be very cautious about going down that route if you're not married.

Our nursery is £56 a day too. We had two ki6ss of nursery age and we put them in for two mornings a week with in laws having the kids in the afternoon one day and my dh working from home one day a week. Part of my working week includes weekends could you look for some weekend work? Could you do something like that? I went back part time as even in my job as a health care professional after childcare and tax I would not be well off enough to justify leaving my kids in nursery all week. It is hard but I dont think you would qualify for much, try the benefits calculator to see what you could get of anything?