Just seen my first 'spag bowl' on FB. I feel like I belong here now

[omikron]

I'm honoured.

Jemzy30, that so made me laugh, I spat tea! If you could see my doctor, you'd love being throbbed off! He's really pokeable! My heart rate seems to be quite high, on occasions ....

I knew someone who always pronounced it as 'bollocknaise'.

'Cue or que instead of queue.'

'Que' for 'cue' turns up a lot on here. Always accompanied, for me, by a mental image of Manuel.

I don't see why 'jamp' in particular would be wrong rather than a local or regional variant past tense. It follows rules of forming irregular past tenses (e.g. drink/drank, run/ran). 'Jamped' would be wrong. I do think that 'it's wrong' can sometimes mean 'it's nonstandard and I really don't like it'. For me, 'wrong' kicks in where usages clearly have no relevance to the actual term or there's a violation of grammatical rules or a confusion or misapprehension at their root ('could of', 'spag bowl', 'carrot's 90p/lb', 'he borrowed me a pen').

I was having a meal with my now ex DH. He was telling me how he was with new clients the night before and was discussing standards of literacy nowadays. The clients said they get CVs from people full of spelling and grammatical errors. He said “I agreed with them that kids nowadays are leaving school illegitimate”

A few minutes later during a conversation about doctors not diagnosing my illness earlier, he said “well doctors are not inflammable”!

But to name a few! 🤣🤣

Yes, ITA was a reading programme, introduced by the then Government. It failed, spectacularly. My younger sister, who could already read (we could all read by age 3) was taught this at school, when she was 5. I still remember how awful it was, trying to teach her to read again, when the scheme was finally dropped.

ITA was fascinatingly awful, but surely a lot (if not, dare I say it, most) of the people writing like the examples on this thread are after its time?

Rest bite instead of respite.

A little bite of rest.

I think that many of you are selfcongratulating ....and a bit pompous.

My ds is dyslexic. The "obviously the poor speller isn't smart enough to wipe his nose" lot of you are as naive as I was before he was diagnosed.

He spells many words incorrectly but when he was 8, his verbal IQ was age 14. (He's intelligent).

I also have dyslexia but I was taught with different standards so I am a very good speller. Neither of us can remember things by rote. We don't know multiplication tables! But understand the concept.

My ds is remarkably smart in many things. His grandfather couldn't spell either, but he was a chemical engineer. His father is an electrical engineer who builds circuit boards from scratch. Can't spell.

Spelling means you can remember letters that make words. It may indicate that you're smart. But not spelling words correctly doesn't mean you're stupid.

Until spelling is not the standard by which we're judged intelligent, dyslexics will be considered stupid. Which is sad, bc we aren't stupid.

If you write bowel when you mean bowl, you may get something very different to what you were after.

"I seen" and "have just saw" have both been used in this thread, apparently without irony. So has "defiantly" .

Just shows none of us is above reproach!

Recently on my fb, I have been treated to a little angle's first birthday pictures. I've also been in a debate with someone who wrote about "pier reviewed papers".

I also suggested (kindly!) that a lady setting up her own business customising clothes should have her things checked as there were grammatical errors. Apparently, if they're customised it doesn't matter though...

I've bin wandering how you cook spag bowl. Just carnt seen to do it rite

catsinthecupboard really great post, thank you.

I find this one in particularly poor (and pompous taste)

In the SEN parenting world on SM you see a lot of people talking about having 'rest bite'

the doctor throbbed me off

Goodness. I hope she spoke to the practice manager about that one.

@pasbeaucoupdegendarme
I've also been in a debate with someone who wrote about "pier reviewed papers".

Having spoken all week to students about research skills, I might have to add that in as a little joke...

Chester Drawers - was he not in a Spag (bowl) western?

One I see a lot on FB is babies delivered by “stalks” as in the bird “stork”.
Eg. “The stalk is going to be visiting us again soon”
The mind boggles!

This is one that's driven me mad for years. I can't remember why it was first in the news, but there's a school in Bootle whose name is:

The Hawthorne's Free School

Who or what is The Hawthorne? Good of him/her/it to set up a free school.

How did that get past the Department of Education? Don't they employ English teachers? I know I am an uber-pedant but on the evidence of the name alone I wouldn't trust that school with my child.

Non-standard past tenses can be very tricky things...

It wasn't until I was at university, and doing a project related to high pressure, that I found out that the past tense of "squeeze" isn't "squoze"! I read a lot, and would like to think I'm reasonably clever, but that one was just so ingrained I'd never noticed it being wrong.

I had a friend who talked about an 'apoplectic' pregnancy!

The number of people who say 'prostrate' when they mean 'prostate' is worrying!

Fair point, Catsinthecupboard, but I have to say that in my experience of working with people who have dyslexia, they go to some lengths to make sure their written work is of a good standard - and fair play to them for their determination.

This is more about a mangling of common words and phrases that is probably the result of a combination of poor teaching, text speak, over-reliance on auto-correct and in some cases, sheer laziness.

I had to read bone apple tea out loud a couple of times before I grasped what it was meant to say.
Standard English is already a challenge for people with dyslexia for entirely justifiable reasons. Wouldn't Mangled English be even more of a challenge? It confuses everybody.

Cant wait for you to cum home. I love you more than you no.

😑

Spag bowl is a new one on me!

My DC are dyslexic so they would spell check adverts etc.

A lot of these examples, I suspect are people rendering speech into text without having seen the original written down.
I knew someone who referred to Environment of Health instead of Environmental Health.

I'm so glad it's not just me who gets. cross about incorrect use of apostrophes's

Hampster

Someone I knew once had to go to the cancel why her children were at school. Yes that's 'council while'.... I had to re read the text a few times!