How do slim people think?

[Episcomama]

...because I really do think there is a difference between how slim and overweight people think. I am very overweight - BMI of 33. So obese rather than overweight, technically.

I've been off and on diets all my adult life, and the only thing I've really had success with is intermittent fasting and keto. When I stick to it, it works. The problem isn't my body, it's my mind. It's as though there's a switch that gets flicked from time to time. A voice in my head telling me to eat in case of famine. Food occupies much of my waking hours - once I've had a meal I'm thinking ahead to the next one.

A dear friend is very slim and once mentioned that she just doesn't really find satisfaction in food in the way I do (comfort, commiseration, celebration, whatever.) When I spent the weekend with her recently, it really became apparent how differently we see food. She was mildly horrified at both the quantity and frequency of my meals whereas I couldn't understand how she was satisfied with what she ate.

Eating disorders aside, do you think there's a difference between a "thin mind" and a "fat mind", to express it crudely. And if you have a thin mind and used to have a fat mind, can you share with me how you flicked that switch?

@IceniSky I agree so much. I think we've lost our perspective of what food should be

well I'm between a 6 and 8 size, but I don't think like a lot of the slim people on here.

I love crappy food. I love chocolate, and crisps, and chips, and curry, and I could easily trough a whole family sized chocolate fudge cake without being sick.

However, I like being thin, so I don't eat them.

My colleagues think I don't like cake or donuts as I always say "no thank you" at work. It is now 2 years since I last had chocolate fudge cake. I just cant be arsed doing the amount of exercise I'd need to get rid of the damage.

Rather than 'dieting' for a few weeks several times a year, I 'let go' for a few weeks several times a year and then strictly deprive myself the rest of the time - I treat the non-eating of fun food as 'normal' and go on a reverse diet for a couple of sheduled weeks through the year - last was holiday and the couple of weeks after, next will be Christmas, then sensible until Easter. (Pregnancy was amazing , I let myself eat the way I want to the rest of the time from the first positive test to birth)

It's bloody hard work to constantly live in self denial and nothing to do with wanting to be 'healthy' and everything to do with wanting a flat-ish stomach. I do not think this is a morally superior way to live, it's not disgusting to make different choices. If I was less vain I would be several sizes larger.

I’m mega thin and love food but tend not to eat my first meal til after midday. I eat when I’m hungry rather than at “normal” mealtimes. So sometimes it can be as late as 4pm by the time I get around to eating.
I’m also small boned and have a very fast metabolism and according to my Fitbit, walk around 15k steps per day.
I would think that portion control and regular exercise would help you lose weight, assuming that’s what you’re looking to do? Don’t keep junk food in the house. Brush your teeth after dinner. Get a fit bit and could your steps. That’s what I’d do if I were you anyway.

I agree about less sleep making you think of food more, if I don’t get enough sleep then I get a strange taste in my mouth all day which tells my brain I’m hungry and I wont stop eating, it’s very odd, does anyone else feel this way?

I barely sleep yet I'm slim. I thought some of my slimness could be down to my body having to burn more energy more hours of the day than most people. Maybe not! It could be like breastfeeding - some women lose weight quickly while BF whereas others gain. All a mystery.

My friend and her adult daughter who have always been slim normally share a portion of anything they buy between 2. If there is nobody to share with they will say order just a starter and maybe a pudding at a restaurant.

They do however eat a lot of crappy snacks - chocolate bars, cakes, crisps and sweets every day.

@VisibleShantiLine yy my slim friends only sleep 5 hours a night.

Most obese people that I know are in denial about their eating habits and amounts something that I have seen pp agreeing with in previous threads. At least you OP are not which is great.

For years I was a size ten. During that time, I was always busy and forgot either breakfast/lunch (sometimes both). Last year I piled on 4 stone. I realised now I'm a sahm, (with both children now in full tine school) I'm constantly bored and thinking about my next meal! I found fasting really helps to control the greedy thoughts over food. Now when I wake up, I dont think of breakfast anymore. I grab a couple of drinks and keep myself busy until dinner time.

This may not help you but now I'm in my 40s I find I lose weight and feel less hungry if I get plenty of sleep. Particularly the chance to nap.

If I'm tired and awake for excessive hours I'll eat excessive food. And not have the energy to exercise.

At 5ft10" and I'm at my heaviest non pregnancy weight, 11st 4lb, but my BMI is still very much in the healthy weight range. I went up to 13st when pregnant, but this came off with no real diet needed.

I have noticed in the last two years, that the weight is creeping up - I'm in my 40's now. During most of my 20's and 30's I could eat anything and not put on weight. I had a real rough patch in my twenties and went down to a tiny size 8 - not a good look for my height. I looked dreadfully ill.

I think about food a lot, I enjoy eating and get great satisfaction from tasty quality food. I'm slowly starting to loose my sweet tooth as I get older, but struggle to turn down a chocolate bar or piece of cake. I eat it, but don't really enjoy it. I'm working on this. I also enjoy cooking and don't see either as a chore.

Reading some of these threads where people find eating in public or get no satisfaction seem's terribly sad to me and those people who are on the super slim side all admit, for the most part to limiting food intake in one way or another.

I can't miss a meal as I feel sick and get super hangry - its a blood sugar thing, my daughter is exactly the same.

Pregnancy/ postnatal excepted, I've always been a healthy weight. It was pretty easy through my teens/ twenties, but as my 30s draw to an end, I am no longer "naturally slim" as in doing whatever I like with no consequence to my waistline.

I exercise a lot. I need a lot of exercise, and if I don't get it I get sluggish and listless, after 4-5 days, insomnia kicks in and my body jitters to move at night. I'm short so I need exercise to keep my metabolism up.

I don't diet... possibly... I actually 5:2 / 16:8 somewhat badly, without analysing everything. I'm aware of what I eat but not obsessive. I stop when I'm comfortably full (except for a rare curry or thai). I try not to snack too much, and try to keep to food with a nutritional purpose. Something like Jaffa Cakes that I can inhale effortlessly are rarely bought into the house. I avoid certain aisles of the supermarket. I also drink very little alcohol which I suspect is why I am the second slimmest person in the family by a significant margin (the prize going to the person with an exercise addiction who lives only on crisps, not so healthy) I also have to be careful about certain ingredients and IBS/ low tolerance (including milk, soya, alcohol, excess sugar, sweetners). I eat to feel good and don't restrict for arbitary reasons.

I love food, but my joints hated the weight of pregnancy and having a small build, I go lumpy not curvy.

Forgot to say, I've lost 3 stone this year, just 1 more to go

I’m moderately slim hovering on the brink of mildly podgy- bmi around 22.5, so the top end of healthy. I love food, and I have a big appetite, and although I’ve never been overweight, I’m pretty sure there’s a fat person in me doing her best to get out. I do a cut-down version of 5:2- around 800 calories a day, twice a week- and have done for years. I don’t generally snack between meals, although I do like to finish off with something sweet, but it can be a very small thing. But I think the main thing I manage is I don’t eat crap. I don’t “waste” calories on cheap nasty shit that makes you feel dirty. No fizzy drinks. No donuts, mince pies, or other rubbish people bring into work. No McDonalds. I do think eating synthetic, empty calories creates a cycle where you eat more of it because it isn’t doing you any good.
Also though, if my jeans get tight (which they quite often do) I reign it in and get more strict with myself until they’re comfortable again. I never accept defeat and buy bigger ones. It’s much, much easier to nip a small problem in the bud and lose 1/4 of a dress size than it is to lose a whole one.

I’m quite slim, although I can feel my metabolism slowing as I age- that’s depressing.

I do like crap food but also feel a bit guilty if I eat it too much. I would have one or two chocolate digestives but would balk at the idea of eating the whole packet because it’s just greedy. I would never eat a whole cake or a whole pizza or a whole big packet of crisps because I would just feel guilty and greedy. However, if I eke the packet of biscuits out for a week, I feel leas guilty.

When I was a child, my mum instilled in us the following:

You have either crisps or chips; never both in one day.

No chocolate or sweets before 11am

If you have pudding at lunch, then none at tea- or vice versa.

So that’s I how I think. I’m an 8-10.

I'm a size 8 and love food/eating, want to eat crap and have to think about my weight a lot.

I basically try not to eat too much and I weigh myself a few times a week and cut back whenever I hit 9 stone.

I really wish I was one of those slim people who either didn't care much about food, or could eat what they like and don't gain weight. Whenever I have relaxed about food intake (eg pregnancy) I put on 2-3 stone

However, I like being thin, so I don't eat them.

My colleagues think I don't like cake or donuts as I always say "no thank you" at work.

This sounds like me. I relax a bit at the weekend so I don't find it so hard. I do do a ton of exercise though. Not to burn calories, but because I like being fit.

Irks me a bit when people comment that I'm so lucky to be slim. It isn't luck.

I'm mid 40s and have always been slim (approx 56kg and 5'6"). Like previous posters have mentioned I don't find food a comfort. If I'm stressed I can't eat. If I'm busy I can't be bothered to think about food. Cooking and eating are pretty much an inconvenience, and I am tempted to get myself some Huel just to cover the bases nutritionally.

I exercise quite a lot as well (and find this enjoyable and relaxing). I'm also vegetarian, and I have Crohn's disease, so these factors also contribute to me being a bit scrawny.

Can I ask a genuine question as I've always struggled to understand this area of things -

Some people always talk about "genetics" being a huge factor in staying slim, especially height. That because of their genetics, they are predisposed at a young age to be obese.

Yet the NHS publish a BMI guide for height and weight, which seems to indicate that if you're somewhere in this green spectrum, you are considered healthy.

So if I was 5'1", female, etc, and met my "target weight" - then surely I would be healthy in some way, and being the best shape for my body type?

Doesn't everyone have a target weight/look that makes the best of their body shape, or am I being woefully U and grossly naive?

My fear is that "slim" is sometimes being used on this thread as a synonym for "straight up and down, tall, slender gamine look" rather than "at the very best weight for my height and body type".

Please don't me either it's a genuine question.

There was a channel 4 programme called something like “secrets of slim people”. I think it’s available on catch-up. Iirc basically they often missed meals as they forgot to eat/it wasn’t a priority for them.

DH is very slim, he doesn't seem to get hungry and will regularly have nothing for breakfast and lunch, but then have a chocolate bar pretty much every day. Dinner is healthy because he eats with me. He doesn't get much enjoyment from food either. We argue about food quite regularly, he gets annoyed that I need to eat regularly and doesn't think it's an issue if he e.g. burns a meal (it's still fuel). I don't actually think his attitude to food is particularly healthy.

I am probably the other way, I am from a very foodie family (farming family with pro cooks in the family as well) and need to eat regular healthy meals. In my family there are a mix of overweight and slim people but we are all obsessed with food.

GinDaddy, There are two kinds of slim

Medically healthy weight slim, can mean some live handles but a healthy weight

Fashion /Vanity slim is the kind of slim is whjch most normal people here call slim, a size 8 or 6, low body fat etc. Usually nott much muscle either, no muffin tops or fat bums

Also i love healthy food.

I don't eat much now. After the age of 35, I just don't need many calories.

Yeah, I'm a size 8 but only because of vanity sizing. 30 years ago when I weighed exactly the same I was a size 12. I still have a couple of items of clothing from back then, still fit, say 12 on the label.

I absolutely adore food and fantasise most days about what I will cook that evening. My partner and I love watching programmes about food and are planning some European city breaks to literally go and eat! (as well as seeing the sights etc.).

I am slim but always on the verge of putting on weight, and the window of difference between my feeling slim and sexy and fat and frumpy is only about 4lbs or 2 kg.....

It is a constant battle to deny myself what I want, i.e lots of red wine and chips and mayonnaise and I try to go to the gym to burn these off and keep my metabolism high. A couple of years ago I had some serious weight training for around 2 months by a Personal Trainer at the gym, and this reshaped my body and gave me definition which I seem to have retained...but I do understand how hard it can be. Getting your mind in regular gym mode can be addictive and hugely beneficial - have you thought about getting a PT? They are brilliant at motivating you and will not judge you, whatever your size.

If I do edge up by the 4lb then I tend to fast for a couple of days, literally not eat for 48 hours, or fast from 10pm to 3pm the following day, this seems to work. Fortunately I do adore salads and loads of healthy stuff (apart from wine and chips with mayonnaise!) so tend to eat these predominantly. It never ceases to amaze me how much people can eat compared to me, and how regularly. Maybe it really is down to portion control and leaving long gaps between eating. In what you're saying about a 'thin mind' and 'fat mind', you're probably right. I know that I'm much, much happier thin and so train myself to enjoy feeling hungry for that benefit. I get positive comments and feel energetic and motivated so it's a win-win situation, whereas when I'm over 10 stone I'm miserable, nothing fits and I just don't feel as attractive.

I hope you manage to get control. Good luck :)

I don't eat much now.

What do you mean by “not much”? I’m late thirties and probably eat more food than ever. It’s mostly good food though which is what’s made the difference to my weight.