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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who IBU - DH vs Dishwasher!

76 replies

DisneyMadeMeDoIt · 20/10/2019 12:08

Hopefully a quick one but just want to assess whether IABU or not.

Happy to be told I am. (For anyone who hasn’t seen my other posts I’m suffering BAD HG- currently 16+5 and for numerous reasons tensions between DH and I are a little high)

DH isn’t around a lot to help a lot but will occasionally load the dishwasher. We have had numerous conversations about DH not using the ‘eco’ setting as it’s takes almost 3 hours (I use this in evening/overnight).

He’s loaded it an hour ago, with ALL of the knives inside and set it off on a 3 hour ‘eco’ cycle. Every single knife in the house - plus several other items I use regularly through the day as very limited in what I can eat and urgency in needing to eat FAST.

I pointed it out to him, he made out I was wrong and went to find a knife- obviously couldn’t! Then skulked away with the ‘well serves me right for trying to help’ look on his face.

I know it’s not a ‘big deal’ but eating/mealtimes are hard enough for me atm without trying to tear apart loaves of bread with my hands and buttering with a spoon 😂 I have specifically asked numerous times for him not to do it and he just ‘ignores me’/forgets.

AIBU?

Will totally accept if so! - He’s currently sulking like I’m a nightmare and he’s a dream domestic house husband 🙄

OP posts:
FishFunk · 20/10/2019 12:10

Why were all the knives dirty?

Original poster
DisneyMadeMeDoIt · 20/10/2019 12:10

The quick setting it 90 mins (or is have been happy to just leave out a knife to hand wash!)

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 20/10/2019 12:10

Open the dishwasher and take a knife out then shut it again to continue the cycle. Not worth falling out about

LIZS · 20/10/2019 12:10

You can't open it , remove a knife and wipe it clean?

JesusHRooseveltChristAgain · 20/10/2019 12:11

Open the dishwasher and take out a knife, I do it all the time. Not a big deal, and certainly not something to argue about.

Original poster
DisneyMadeMeDoIt · 20/10/2019 12:11

@FishFunk

We have ample knives (8-10 between 2 of us) there were 3 clean this morning ... but then DH made himself bacon sandwiches 🙄

OP posts:
Lipz · 20/10/2019 12:12

Open the door take one out, close the door and dishwasher re starts.

Original poster
DisneyMadeMeDoIt · 20/10/2019 12:12

I suggested opening the dishwasher to which DH huffed as it wouldn’t ‘finish the cycle’ - it’s half way through

He clearly thought IWBU to want to open it

OP posts:
FishFunk · 20/10/2019 12:12

He’s being unreasonable for using three knives to make bacon sarnies when one would have done the job fine.

YABU a bit about the dishwasher.

xyzandabc · 20/10/2019 12:13

Just open the dishwasher, take a knife out, close dishwasher again. If knife is still slightly dirty (unlikely) give it a little wash by hand.

Really no different to getting a knife from the drawer.

xyzandabc · 20/10/2019 12:14

Just seen your reply. Does your dishwasher definitely not finish the cycle if the door gets opened?

Everyone I've ever used just keeps going when you shut the door again.

LucileDuplessis · 20/10/2019 12:15

Just take a knife out, wipe it and let dishwasher continue. Not a big deal.

Countrylifeornot · 20/10/2019 12:16

YABVU, just open the dishwasher and get a knife out.
Haven't read your other threads but is there any chance you're being slightly "only woman to have ever been pregnant"?

Cherrysoup · 20/10/2019 12:16

I think you can open most dishwashers and when you close them again, they just carry on. YABU. Bit pointless falling out over something so minor.

Lipz · 20/10/2019 12:17

All dishwashers continue with the cycle. Unless you stop it completely and turn it off. Just take one out, why are you making suggestions? In the time you both had an argument over this, you would have had the whole dishwasher emptied, hand washed, dried and put away.

AdaColeman · 20/10/2019 12:22

Just open the dishwasher and get yourself a knife, no need to consult him about doing that, surely?

SkaraBrae · 20/10/2019 12:26

Cherrysoup OP wanted to do precisely that but it sounds like her DH didn't let her?

foodname · 20/10/2019 12:27

I know I will sound patronising, but assuming this is your first child you're about to have much bigger issues and you really have to learn to let this stuff slide, or married life just becomes a constant battle.

EatsFartsAndLeaves · 20/10/2019 12:28

Three hours?! Mine does a 30 minute speed cycle, it is a tabletop one but still.

PenelopeFlintstone · 20/10/2019 12:28

Yep, open it. It’ll be fine.

foodname · 20/10/2019 12:28

(Both of you I mean, not just you specifically)

Fairylea · 20/10/2019 12:29

Open it and take the knife out and then continue the cycle... surely!

OneTerrificMouse · 20/10/2019 12:30

If this is a regular problem, just buy more knives.

but yes, just open the dishwasher, grab a knife, handwash it and use it.

OneTerrificMouse · 20/10/2019 12:31

Also, don't keep butter in the fridge. Then you can spread it with any piece of cutlery.

thecatsthecats · 20/10/2019 12:31

I do get your annoyance OP, as people do this at work first thing if the dishwasher wasn't set the day before. Trapping everyone's mugs in for 2h when you want a morning tea!

(and no, the stupid machine won't allow us to stop and start...)