Bit of an odd one.. I am pretty house proud. It’s by no means a show home. But the dishes are usually done and put away, it’s nearly always vacuumed (I have a cordless takes me no time at all), floor mopped, bathroom cleaned there’s no laundry lying around and it’s tidy as it can be with kids etc etc. I have ocd, anxiety and depression. I wish I could relax more around mess but I cannot and I would never judge anybody else’s home though.
I am fortunate enough to be a SAHM so I generally clean when DC are at school so the weekends with DC are for fun things as a family. I do plan to go back to work but both Dc have additional needs, DD only started school last month so I’m having some me time for now as I have raised them with very little support or help from family and Oh is always at work.
Anyway, every time mil comes over she comments on my clean home. Not in a well done, nice house house kind of way but a way she’s either jealous or making a dig because I have more time on my hands than her and I’m sick of it.
Things like ‘oh your house is so clean, but you have all the time in the world don’t you’ ‘my house is never clean because we both work’ ‘come clean my house because you have more time than me’ ‘you need to spend more time with the children rather than cleaning’ (again bullshit I clean when they are at school and don’t clean constantly) ‘must be so nice to have all the time in the world’. She says it all in such a bitchy way.
I just think you’re either house proud or your not. I’m aware if I worked I’d have less time but I would still want a clean house. I would never go over there and judge her house and truthfully it’s not be cleanest.
Every single time she comes over... But yet there’s been the odd time she’s turned up, usually unannounced and it’s been a mess and she’s judging me that way. I can’t bloody win!!
She’s also very intrusive. Looking through my stuff. Looking in a box (a parcel I had delivered yesterday), telling me how to re arrange my house. Telling me this and that, I should stop using my tumble dryer so much.
It’s just constant digs that I don’t work. Me and Oh agreed I’d have some time at home before finding a job. It’s hard. Both Dc have additional needs, we’ve had no family support raising them (literally didn’t have any time to myself before DC were both at school). I could be needed to pick them up at any time, school meetings, hospital appointments.
My life isn’t as easy as she thinks it is being a stay at home mum!
OH tells me to ignore her but he doesn’t stick up me for it all!!
Aibu to expect him to say something to her? I dread her visits! I feel like a failure most days as it is and she just tops it off!