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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Is this CF or AIBU

99 replies

Auntmnrain · 15/10/2019 14:26

Posting here as everyone I've told finds this hilarious ( except me)

Every 8 weeks i go out with my DH DB and SIL. It is this weekend every 8 weeks that i don't have DSS's so i do look forward to this particular weekend a lot.

So Saturday night we all went out to an Indian restaurant which is lovely and you take your own alcohol. Last time we went out i took the alcohol (prosecco) this time SIL said she'd get it so all good.

We were having a nice night but something was missing i don't drink very often but when i do i enjoy the tipsy feeling but this night it just wasn't happening. There weren't as many laughs or funny conversations i thought maybe it was me. It was still a nice night just not as fun as normal.

Anyway as we were parting ways SIL said did you enjoy the prosecco i said yes thanks it was nice she then said it was alcohol free and said that i could thank her in the morning winked and walked off!!

Thing is I'd planned the Sunday to be a lazy day with Netflix and a thick head so i didn't want to thank her.

I told a few of my friends in group chat they think it was extremely funny as they know how much i look forward to this particular night out and enjoy my rare chance to drink.

I never drink at home or out with DSS's as DSS's DM is alcoholic, they don't like alcohol infact can't stand it so we never drink around them hence why i look forward to the weekend every 2 months the boys stay with their nana.

To be honestly part of me finds it bloody hilarious to but the other part of me thinks what a cow doing that 😂

P.S i didn't thank her the next morning

OP posts:

HEMammajamma · 15/10/2019 16:10

That might be it then, as I said you know her more than us so you would know better what her intentions could be

RoyalCorgi · 15/10/2019 16:13

I don't like playing tricks on people, so I don't think it's funny - though better than doing it the other way round.

The mystery is why she did it - saving money? dropping you a hint that you drink too much? trying to give up alcohol herself so deciding one bottle is easier than two?

LittleAndOften · 15/10/2019 16:14

If you liked the taste and enjoyed it, I don't see the problem

museumum · 15/10/2019 16:15

It sounds like you were actually looking forward to being hungover?!?
Surely it was nice to feel good in the morning?
(Though agree it’s weird not to tell you - but surely you saw the bottle?)

GrimDamnFanjo · 15/10/2019 16:19

Well maybe she is the one with the drinking problem?
You've said she gets drunker than you do. She may be going sober and find it too difficult to tell you?

Rafflesway · 15/10/2019 16:24

As pp's have already stated, I'm amazed you couldn't tell the difference.

A well meaning friend once invited us over for lunch and served this as we were driving. OMG, it was awful!

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 15/10/2019 16:24

When you said that she was the one who normally gets drunk, I thought maybe she is the one trying to reduce her alcohol intake, and rather cheekily didn’t fancy being the only sober one.

It would irritate me because I’m a big girl and it’s up to me if I drink or not, not for another adult to make the decision for me.

I’d just take my own the next time and tell her to feck off with the na Prosecco (and not share mine 😉)

diddl · 15/10/2019 16:27

Were you all drinking it?

Was the Netflix better or worse without the "thick head"?

monkeymonkey2010 · 15/10/2019 16:28

It's usually her that gets a bit to sozzled where as i stop at tipsy
She's a passive aggressive bitch and projecting her own issues on to you to make it look like YOU have a 'problem'.

For whatever reason, SHE did not want to drink alcohol that night - and just like a bitch she decided that YOU were not 'allowed' to have alcohol either so she deliberately deceived you....and let you think you were drinking alcohol when you weren't.

How easy was it for her to mess with your head OP?
YOU knew something was 'off' and because she didn't tell you the truth about the alcohol content of your drink, YOU ended up doubting your own judgement and blaming it on yourself.
The atmosphere was probably even worse due to HER attitude.

There was nothing nice about what she did OP. and you'd be a fool to let her off with it.
In future, make a point of taking your own alcoholic drinks only - leave her to play her games with herself.

I bet she didn't try fooling the 'men' like that did she?
Arsehole!

DancingWithDogs · 15/10/2019 16:31

@Auntmnrain could be totally going the wrong way with this.. but it made me question if she's pregnant?

Jesse70 · 15/10/2019 16:32

I don't think she was trying to be funny she maybe just wanted to see if she could have a good night without it
And see if anyone noticed
It is stoptober after all

AryaStarkWolf · 15/10/2019 16:34

I bet she didn't try fooling the 'men' like that did she?
Arsehole!

Yes good point, was it just you and her drinking the non alcoholic shite OP?

enjoyingscience · 15/10/2019 16:44

I think it’s a massive dick move. She’s set out to catch you out and embarrass you, and I think others are right that it’s because she’s worried about her own drinking so is projecting on you.

I’d be cross with her.

Original poster

Auntmnrain · 15/10/2019 16:50

My DB brought ale he makes at home and some sloe gin.

As stated i have tried alcohol free red wine and it was awful i would definitely know if i was drinking that but this prosecco looked just like normal prosecco in a normal prosecco bottle and tasted the same.

If she was doing it to help me out with the dieting I've since found out it is the same amount of calories as normal prosecco

I very rarely have a lazy day only when I'm a little hungover and can't be bothered to do anything which i was looking forward to Sunday because it was raining all day. I got all my jobs done Friday/Saturday uniforms were hung and ready housework washing done ect so yeah weirdly i was looking forward to a hangover instead i ended up sanding a table

OP posts:

breakfastpizza · 15/10/2019 16:56

YANBU. It's incredibly rude and controlling to do this to another adult.

FloatingObject · 15/10/2019 16:56

I wouldn't like this. It's someone controlling my night. She basically decided what condition you would be in. Maybe that sounds a bit abstract but that's what it is. I dunno. I wouldn't actually see this as funny. Just a bit weird and controlling.

Samosaurus · 15/10/2019 17:05

extremely doubtful she's 42 almost 43
My friend is a midwife and says there are a lot of early 40s women with surprise babies - even those that have previously had IVF - as as one gets close to the end of their fertile years the ovaries can go a bit crazy releasing eggs! I guess time will tell if she is or isn't pregnant!

AcrobaticCardigan · 15/10/2019 17:15

Did she perhaps buy it by accident and only realise after? Or she could be pregnant! Otherwise bit of a weird thing to do.

timshelthechoice · 15/10/2019 17:23

Alcohol is not fattening. It is empty calories, though.

There’s no way I wouldn’t notice I was drinking NA wine.

This I'm still puzzled about. It's usually sickeningly sweet or overwhelmingly flavoured.

bloodywhitecat · 15/10/2019 17:28

I don't see the problem, you enjoyed the drink didn't you?

flowery · 15/10/2019 17:28

” done Friday/Saturday uniforms were hung and ready housework washing done ect so yeah weirdly i was looking forward to a hangover instead i ended up sanding a table”

She is not responsible for your decision to sand a table instead of watching Netflix!

I’d be cross at being deceived but that is a bonkers reason to be cross!

I’ve tried Nosecco. It tastes nothing like the real thing at all imo. Perhaps your taste buds were affected by the curry or something?

Catsandchardonnay · 15/10/2019 17:29

YANBU OP and you sound like a fab stepmum to be so considerate of your DSSs that you don’t drink at home. You deserve to let your hair down on a boozy night out, and she was mean to deprive you of it.

TheSunAlsoRises · 15/10/2019 18:53

I don't think she approves of your 'getting tipsy'.

INeedNewShoes · 15/10/2019 20:31

‘Were you trying to tell me something with the Nosecco? '

I'd send her a text similar to this. Opens the conversation. If there's a hidden meaning she can tell you and if there isn't it will give you the opportunity to tell her that you missed your 2 monthly drinking night!

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