To think don't keep taking my drink at work?

[openitsoicanseeyousmile]

I'm known to bring a can of drink in everyday for lunch. It's kept in the shared fridge at work - Everyone knowns it's mine as there's a little section box for each person with their name on.

A colleague of mine is pregnant and for the third time has taken my drink and not bothered replacing it. When questioned, she says something along the lines of "Sorry! Bad sickness. This helps. I'll get a new one for you tomorrow".

She always does, it's there the following day. But it means having to go out at lunchtime to get another one. The local shop is only 2 minutes away but it means eating up time I don't have since I have 30 minutes lunch.

I'm really not sure how to go about it. If it was the usual person, I'd tell them to stop the cheek and buy their own to bring in! But she's pregnant and suffering from sickness. I had HG with my son so I feel awful at the thought of telling her she can most certainly never take from me again without asking

I remember the horrendous feeling of needing something sweet and fizzy to curve the sickness and it did often help, so I imagine it's very helpful to her.

Perhaps I should buy a multipack and suggest she goes half's so we can both enjoy them during the week? Or is this too doormat like?

I'm really not sure how to go about it. I don't think she thinks she's being cheeky in the slightest, and is an otherwise lovely colleague.

What would you do? I usually have no issues being assertive but I feel as if the lines have been blurred.

Hmmm there seems to be a theme with these cheeky fucker threads. Once called out the CF is indignant and delivers a very measured response, wilfully falling just short of a proper apology or reparation.

Here - drink replaced but wrong flavour
Ticket thread - paid 1p short and via a third party
Lunch thread - paid part of debt only

It's all a bit "fuck you, won't do what you tell me" ...

Sorry for TAAT.

Why the fuck would she buy a different bloody flavour when she likes the same one as you.

No way I'd trust that can.

I'm sorry but you can't let that go. You need to say her that it isn't acceptable! Her passive aggressiveness continues!

As an aside, is aqua natal something you can legitimately get paid time off for? I thought it was only for actual ante natal classes.

As an aside, is aqua natal something you can legitimately get paid time off for? I thought it was only for actual ante natal classes.

Yes you can, anything approved/suggested by your midwife

I agree that it's time to report her - this is bullying behaviour. She's been taking your lunch and now started swapping it with other items which is wholly unacceptable conduct. Don't get into tit for tat stuff - you've tried being accommodating and she's chosen to escalate it instead of just doing the right thing. At least your boss knows the situation, so when you explain what has happened today it is clear that you were happy to have things rectified informally, but she is ramping up the aggression and unpleasantness. What a cow!

If she was taking my drink every day, I would keep an eye out for every time she goes near the fridge, follow her & when I caught her with her fingers near my drinK, give her the loudest bollocking she has ever heard, call her what she is, a thief. Could you report her to HR & also ask for a notice to be put on the fridge door stating please do not take anything that does not belong to you.

I sent a text similar to the one advised by the poster upthread

It says "Hi Sharon, I'm tired of having no drink for lunch, or a drink that isn't even mine if that's what you were doing by leaving yours in my fridge tray. Please bring in the missing drink tomorrow, the ones I drink and nothing else. I will also replace your drink that I had with my lunch today, since you took mine earlier on. I hope you enjoyed your class, hopefully they have lots of vending machines to keep that awful sickness at bay for you! Enjoy your evening"

She replied with

"I won't be anything since you drunk my drink today! I didn't take your drink, you must be mistaken. I actually feel very very attacked by your last message. Please remember the state I'm in at the moment, is it kind?"

I haven't replied, she sent that an hour ago. I don't know what to say. But I will be going to my boss (no HR department)

Management again. Show them the messages and get it reported officially. There’s fuck all wrong with her that remotely gives her an excuse to be like she is, she’s just trying to bully and make you look the bad guy for calling her CFery out.

What a bitch.

Go to HR, especially after her comments in front of everyone else. She's using her pregnancy to bully. If she's that sick she needs to see HR about having an OT assessment.

Get a coolbag.

I just summarized everything to DH and read out your last post. He is now ranting about entitled twats.

Time for management to be involved

Christ, she’s a twat! She’s only bloody pregnant. Thousands of women are currently pregnant and are not helping themselves to things and being total bitches about it. In fact, I’m bloody pregnant, I’ve had severe HG since week 6-7 and am still vomiting daily at 33 weeks. I’m not running about pinching things!
Take your drink tomorrow. In the morning say rather loudly “Pregnant, I’ve put a can in my tray for lunch. It’s pepsi. Please do not touch it today”.
Also, it is worth mentioning to your manager that you’re starting to feel victimised in a way that is actually quite hard to fathom. She has singled you out for poor treatment and catty comments because you don’t want to provide her with soft drinks?! That’s actual playground bullying. Lunch money or else style.

Hang on, she left a drink in your tray and is now saying you TOOK it? Wow. Vindictive little game she's playing there. Go and talk to Management and get in first or heaven knows what nonsense she'll spout.

God she's vile. She really thinks being pregnant is an achievement or something, yes well done for getting jizzed in, have a can!

I bet she will say that someone else took it and she is being wrongly accused.

What a cow!! Now she's setting up to make some sort of complaint about your behaviour. You have to get in there first!

Has she always been like this??

Get a copy of that email and a complaint into HR now, before she can beat you to it
Cos that's what will happen next,

So she’s saying that she didn’t have a drink because you drank hers.
But you said that by the time you realised your drink was missing and her drink was there she had left for the day, so how did she know?

Yeah she took it and she's going to war with you. Get to hr, she's going to complain you're attacking her.

Seriously hr folks must be thinking what the fuck.

"I won't be anything since you drunk my drink today! I didn't take your drink, you must be mistaken. I actually feel very very attacked by your last message. Please remember the state I'm in at the moment, is it kind?"

What condition, she pregnant like 1000's of other women every day. It's not condition for fucks sake.

On the hand perhaps her condition is being a bitch.

Yes speak to your manager in the morning, she clearly thinks that because she pregnant she deserves special treatment. God help her partner/husband who has to live with her.

Definitely officially complain. And stop using words like 'take' or 'took' and use 'steal'/'stole'/'stealing' as that is what she is doing. She's a thief and needs to be correctly identified as such in any communication.

Oh dear, you should have just left it, not texted that. This is the sort of thing you should talk about face to face, not send petty little messages to each other - it's now escalating into something ridiculous. Be careful not to get riled up by the backing you've received here into further antagonism.

Unless you actually saw her drink that drink, she's going to claim it was someone else. And if I was the employer, my eyes would be rolling up in my head so far.

You shouldn't have drunk her drink today, on principal you should gave just returned it to her shelf.

I'd stick a sticky label with your name on your tin.

Obviously pregnancy is affecting her sight too, if she can't tell the difference between the two cans, as well as her sense of right and wrong.
What a cheeky bitch.....