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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not want to pay £5k for a school trip?

455 replies

Lincspeeps · 08/10/2019 14:54

In short, DD's school are running a trip to South Africa in 2021 - safari, time in Madagascar, trekking, social responsibility work etc.

Problem is, its £4.5k plus spends and optional extras - the safari being one. So, with insurance, visas, inoculations etc it'll be five grand and more.

DD's three best friends are all going and we, at a massive stretch, could probably afford it BUT in reading where they stay etc it just seems like such a rip off. I want her to do something exciting but £5k just seems a ridiculous amount.

She's not spoiled and completely understands the value of money but she'll be devastated if she can't go and I'll feel like a demon by preventing her (she's 15 now, will be almost 17 when trip takes place). I just feel that £5k could be spent in a much better way where travel is concerned - I'm sure you can buy a round the world plane tickets for a couple of grand, for example!!

Help...…..

OP posts:
CatkinToadflax · 11/10/2019 16:19

Before you get so het up with the phrase I used, drspouse and puzzledandpissedoff, this was over twenty years ago. The phrase ‘volunteerism’ didn’t exist then and neither did the concept.

longwayoff · 11/10/2019 16:26

A lifetime of memories? Conversation with friend recently "Do you remember how I made sure we took the kids to different countries every year and how I thought it was a great educational experience as well as a fab holiday? Ask either of them now (mid thirties) what their memories are and most of what they recall is whether the Water Park, or whatever attraction, was any good. We may as well have stayed here and gone to Alton Towers or Thorpe Park".Smile

CatkinToadflax · 11/10/2019 16:58

*sorry, I meant ‘voluntourism’ in my comment above. I wouldn’t do the trip nowadays but at that time it was seen as a positive thing.

drspouse · 11/10/2019 17:04

this was over twenty years ago. The phrase ‘volunteerism’ didn’t exist then and neither did the concept.
And yet I was a volunteer science teacher over 20 years ago and was firmly told that people with skills that were readily available would not be taken on (e.g. nurses would be training other nurses, not taking a job from a nurse, English teachers were ten a penny). The concept is NOT new.

CAG12 · 11/10/2019 17:07

I went to kenya when I was 18, that was a school trip that I seem to remember cost roughly the same amount.

I paid for it myself though....

CatkinToadflax · 11/10/2019 17:10

Goodness me drspouse. I am clearly very wrong. At least I’ve caught up with what’s acceptable now. Hmm

Puzzledandpissedoff · 11/10/2019 17:33

Apart from the problem of taking work from others, isn't there also an issue around what £5000 could buy at local rates, rather than being spent on some "character building exercise"?

If folk are so bothered about the orphange / animal sanctuary / clinic / whatever, why not just send them the money - or even half of it - and use the rest on a normal holiday elsewhere?

ExecutiveFiat · 11/10/2019 17:54

Did the OP ever come back to the thread?

mencken · 11/10/2019 18:28

If folk are so bothered about the orphange / animal sanctuary / clinic / whatever, why not just send them the money - or even half of it - and use the rest on a normal holiday elsewhere?

because you don't get a tan and insta-likes by doing that.

Willow2017 · 11/10/2019 18:49

Because you don't get a tan and insta-likes by doing that.
😂😂😂

Thesuzle · 11/10/2019 18:56

You do realise that the price of the trip is paying for the teachers to go. Or at least ask this question of the head.,

Skinnychip · 11/10/2019 18:58

You do realise that the price of the trip is paying for the teachers to go. Or at least ask this question of the head.,

This has already been discussed.
You do realise this is not "a holiday" or teachers?

Skinnychip · 11/10/2019 18:58

For not or

flowery · 11/10/2019 19:20

” You do realise that the price of the trip is paying for the teachers to go. Or at least ask this question of the head.”

Do you think the teachers should pay to go?

Boshmama · 11/10/2019 22:36

I don't understand posters saying 'if you're that bothered why not just send the money to the school/orphanage etc.'

The 'volunteering' aspect of these trips is less than 5 days out of the month they are away, so is not the primary reason for people going on then. It's also not solely the responsibility of people who want to do expeditions like this to fund different projects- anyone could donate money, not just teenagers contemplating a memorable month abroad. They at least are putting money into the local economy by hiring local guides/security, spending money in shops and restaurants, often visiting difficult to travel to places that receive very few visitors. If posters here are so concerned they could send money any time they like!

My experience set me up with a lifetime love of travel and a huge respect for the countries I visit.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 11/10/2019 22:41

because you don't get a tan and insta-likes by doing that

True enough, mencken, true enough ... Wink

Puzzledandpissedoff · 11/10/2019 22:52

A useful read below for anyone who still believes voluntourism to be worthwhile. The site's a pretty silly one, but the points - no doubt written by someone else - are illuminating:

www.lifeasabutterfly.com/negative-impacts-volunteer-tourism/

Willow2017 · 11/10/2019 23:35

The 'volunteering' aspect of these trips is less than 5 days out of the month they are away, so is not the primary reason for people going on then.
Exactly!
Its an expensive holiiday dressed up in a 'helping the poor folks' garb to make it seem worthwhile. So it's a con.
I am sure the people's lives must be changed completely for the better by a bunch of unqualified teenagers playing at building or being teachers for a week. Maybe just use the money to pay the actual tradesmenand women who live there and provide all the materials they need instead?

00100001 · 12/10/2019 08:30

@Thesuzle

"You do realise that the price of the trip is paying for the teachers to go. Or at least ask this question of the head."

You do realise that the price of EVERY school trip is paying for the teachers to go?

Do you really think teacher's pay to take your child on trips?? Confused

angell84 · 12/10/2019 18:14

It is so stupid, but then I also think that fee paying, private schools are an incredibly stupid idea.

I got talking to a man last night, who droned on and on about which school he went to , and about how important it was to get into Cambridge or Oxford.

I said "important to who? I don't care which University, you, or anyone went to"

Who cares?

Jeeves93 · 16/10/2019 15:04

Tell her you will buy her a car instead. That will make her care less about it. Spend £1000 on the car and you've saved £4000. Easy.

Beccy82 · 16/10/2019 15:34

If my kids had a letter about a trip costing that much they wouldn't even bother bringing it home. They know the answer would be a big fat no.
I think it's very cheeky of a school to ask that amount. It's not fair on the kids that cant afford it then their parents feel like shit because they are not financially stable enough. I'm one of those parents and if mine did ask i'd feel like a horrible bitch telling them no, then i'd feel so bad about saying no that i'd figure out how to do it over the 2yrs. But then, i'd have to consider my other children may be offered a trip for the same price. Easier to say no to them all in the long run.
Personally I wouldn't even let my kids go anywhere for a month without me (my opinion though).
We did a wk holiday all inclusive to tunisia for 2.6k for a family of 5. So when I see one holiday for one person is 5k plus you'd have to spend extra on two other things which could put it anywhere up to 6.5k it instantly makes me think that's two family holidays abroad somewhere
My answer to u is simply to say no.

doginthekitchen · 16/10/2019 15:40

I think with these things they suggest fund raising so that it doesn't end up costing the family £5k. The fund raising is morally dubious (I'm being generous) because it plays on the volunteerism which as best achieves very little. Who fund raises for a school trip - I'm amazed they are still getting away with it - I'm amazed anyone gives them anything.

BeyondMyWits · 17/10/2019 07:23

They do suggest fundraising, but... they give strict deadlines - so much by this date etc...

they generally give around 18 months at most to complete the payment. £5000 pounds means fundraising £277 a month EVERY month for 18 months whilst studying for GCSEs

bank of mum and dad...

doginthekitchen · 17/10/2019 07:29

bank of mum and dad... I've heard of people being taken in by the fundraising option. Enthusiasm from their dc is high to begin with and then quickly tapers off - and by that stage non refundable money has paid and parents either feel forced to either pay themselves or continue to do the lion's share of the fundraising while the dcs make a token appearance at the events the combo of GCSE exams do not help.

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