Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to move desperately now

68 replies

HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:24

Hi all ☺️

I am just wanting some advice really on whether I am being IABU. We bought a 4 bed house last year after finding out we were expecting our DD, we were first time buyers so we found a house that we love and had lots of potential! The house has an annexe as well as 4 bedrooms and it has building permission for an extension between the house and the annexe so we would be set for life with space needs.

The issue is the back of the house is rough but the front of the house is lovely (DP and I absolutely adore our neighbours) The back of the house constantly has people smoking and drinking outside of it, there is a constant smell of weed coming from the properties and there are children running amock till after midnight! They climb on our 6 foot fence all the time as there is a path blocked off by our garden fence that leads to the local park! We constantly tell them to get down but we get told to f* off! 😕 we are parents so we always show concern for the children and tell them to get down so they don’t hurt themselves but they just laugh. The last straw was that yesterday when I was trying to put DP down for a nap there was a knock on the door, it was the police! They started looking round the whole house, I could tell they felt bad when they saw me with my baby bump holding my DD (I am currently 21 weeks pregnant) they said they had an anonymous report of a smell of cannabis coming from the property.. I was shocked & now I don’t want to live here as I believe it was malicious as we keep ourselves to ourselves (both sides of the house are council owned.. front is elderly bungalows and the back are terraced houses)

We would struggle to get a higher mortgage in a nicer area or we could if we were to give up the size of our property and move somewhere a lot lot smaller.

So my AIBU is should DP and I stay in our current property or sell it and financially strain ourselves to move into a nicer area so that our children can grow up in a safer area where the police don’t come knocking?

OP posts:
bluebell34567 · 07/10/2019 09:29

moving is a good idea. you cant settle there with such environment.

Finfintytint · 07/10/2019 09:30

I’m surprised a search warrant was raised just because an anonymous person caught a whiff of cannabis.

zafferana · 07/10/2019 09:33

Nothin on earth would make me stay where you are. A house is a house. I'd find another one that I loved, one that wasn't surrounded by people smoking weed, kids climbing over the back fence and people making malicious complaints. You really want to raise your DC in an area like that?

Oysterbabe · 07/10/2019 09:33

Move. Location wins everytime. It's all well and good having a big house but it won't make you happy if you don't want to leave it. The local kids will be your kids' playmates later down the line.

Acciocats · 07/10/2019 09:35

Can’t you move to a better area but a smaller property so that you’re not stretching yourselves too much?
You’ll be a family of 4 so you don’t need a house with 4 bedrooms plus annexe and even more space to extend. A 3 bed will be perfectly fine and if you really want more space you could plan to move again once the children are older and childcare costs reduce.

I honestly would not relax living somewhere like you describe. No matter how spacious the house, the constant noise, interruptions, kids on your wall and smoking weed would just depress me. I would far rather have a bit less space but peace of mind

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:36

Thank you for your responses! The police came and knocked on the door and they literally checked everywhere including my babies bedroom, which me and her were in the room at the time. He pointed out that the black out blind in the nursery could have been the reason they reported it as it might look alarming! What to the back of the house were everyone smokes weed!

They checked all the cupboards and the annexe so they must have had a warrant.. plus my partner and I are very law abiding so we had no problem with it at all but I just feel like I don’t want to live here now.

We just don’t want to live here now but we’ve got so much for our money in this property Sad

OP posts:
TroysMammy · 07/10/2019 09:40

Didn't you tell them the strong smell of weed comes from next door?

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:40

We will definitely need a three bed regardless of our DC’s ages as we know this little one is a little boy so three bedrooms is the minimum! Plus my partner has a hobby which takes up so much room that we would need either another bedroom or another reception room... I really don’t want to not let him have that as he does so much for us and he has given up doing his hobby out of the house altogether 😕

OP posts:
HisBetterHalf · 07/10/2019 09:43

Why the reference to the neighbouring properties being council owned? Are you insinuating only council tenants smoke weed?

Finfintytint · 07/10/2019 09:44

Did they leave you a copy of their powers to search?

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:44

@TroysMammy the houses at the back are all terraced so we wouldn’t know which one it comes from.. plus they all know each other on the street so we don’t want to cause any trouble with council tenants especially since we are both out at work all day.. I work for a housing association so I know how bad it can get for homeowners who own one of the only houses on the street. It makes it harder with it being the biggest house on the street.. semi detached, annexe, front and back garden and 6 foot high fence

I just hope it wasn’t malicious as a result of us putting out the impression that we are so much better than them. We have never purposefully put out that impression but we have a 6 foot fence and we keep our heads down. We get along with our elderly neighbours and we cut their lawn for them when we do our own

OP posts:
GingersAreLush · 07/10/2019 09:46

Did they not tell you whether they had a warrant or not? I thought they were meant to? I’m a tad surprised they bothered searching your house over a smell of weed and also surprised they didn’t notice the smell of it coming from the back of the house if it really is that strong. I guess they popped round there too coz they might as well.

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:47

@HisBetterHalf.. no no not at all! I was just saying both sides of the property are council owned.. my neighbour and I in our semi detached properties own them so we do get a lot of dirty looks and comments. They are the only 2 4 bed properties so a lot of people want them.

I work for a housing association and I have absolutely no problem with council tenants at all

I honestly didn’t mean for it too come across like that 😕

OP posts:
OneThreadOnly0101 · 07/10/2019 09:49

Why did you let someone enter and search your house without clarifying if they were entitled to do so? Police don't generally give a shite about weed stink.

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:49

@GingersAreLush- they said they had a report to come to our property from an anonymous caller.. they drove off in their car after they finished the search of the annexe 😕

OP posts:
Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:50

My DP let them in.. I was upstairs putting the baby down for her morning nap

OP posts:
ThreeLittleDots · 07/10/2019 09:52

Did they show you the paperwork? Did they show you their ID?!

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:52

Should we generally have asked for a search warrant but I guess my DP didn’t want to make them suspicious of us.. and I’m pregnant so DP probably didn’t want to stress me out too much

OP posts:
MatildaTheCat · 07/10/2019 09:52

Location location location.

Consider a smaller property with potential for a garden room for the mystery hobby or a loft room?

You got all that space at the price for a reason. Now you know the reason unfortunately.

TheSunAlsoRises · 07/10/2019 09:53

Did you check police IDs etc?

ThreeLittleDots · 07/10/2019 09:53

Contact the station for the paperwork as any official trouble with neighbours has to be reported when you sell the property

ListenLinda · 07/10/2019 09:53

Christ the police would forever be searching houses near where I live. There is a permanent stink of it and I am also desperate to move away.

Feel for you OP, malicious and absolute waste of police time.

Original poster
HKM94 · 07/10/2019 09:54

Yeah I guess we could look at a place with space in the the loft for his hobby.. it takes up a lot of room as it is figure painting (warhammer).. I don’t know if anyone has heard of it 😅 when we first started dating it looked like a small hobby than we moved and it spread into a full dining room with a 6 by 4 table

OP posts:
PancakeAndKeith · 07/10/2019 10:02

Am I understanding correctly that the problem is not your street but the houses you back on to?

I’m also surprised at the police coming out for the smell of weed.

ittooshallpass · 07/10/2019 10:04

Why didn’t you tell the police about all your concerns and the issues you have with neighbours at the back of your property while they were there?

This was a perfect opportunity to stamp out the problems you’re having Confused

Swipe left for the next trending thread