I started a new job 4 years ago as a lecturer at a local university. I was employed with 3 other new members of staff (M1, M2 and F1). We all got on really well and spent a lot of time outside of work socialising with each other and our respective partners. Friday night post work drinks and food were a weekly occurrence and we also start a wine and nibbles rotation at each other’s houses every few months. Fast forward a few years and we still do our bi-monthly evenings but I am less able to get out for the post-work drinks every week since having DS1. M1 and M2 are openly are not very keen on being around children so that limits things although I do try to go out with them when I can. M1 has recently gotten engaged and brought the save the dates into work, it’s for next summer. F1 and M2 were invited but I was not, which was slightly awkward as it’s a 300 person venue but of course it’s their wedding and they are welcome to invite whoever they like. Now this is where I am trying to work out if I am being unreasonable. It’s my turn to host the next wine and nibbles evening- and it falls on my birthday next month which is great as I will get to celebrate with everyone and won’t need to find a babysitter as DS will be asleep upstairs. I’ve spoken to everyone (friends both from work and outside work) and it’s all been organised. Yesterday we received a message from M1s partner saying “as it’s our legal wedding next month we will host the wine and nibbles evening and it can be a mini hen/stag wedding appreciation event”. AIBU to be feeling a bit annoyed that they’ve decided to turn my birthday into a celebration for a wedding that they aren’t inviting me to? Do I just go along with it or say “sorry but we’ve arranged to be celebrating my birthday then?”