To think SIL and BIL have plenty of money and are cheeky fuckers

[PansyTea]

Yet another begging message from SIL this morning asking "for a lend". I'm absolutely sick of it. DH gave in a few times and now it's constant.

We have recently bought a fixer upper house, our first, and now they think we're loaded. We live in a fairly cheap area and work average jobs. One child. SIL and BIL work 30-40 hours each, but less than half those hours are through the books, so they get plenty of tax credits. They have boasted of this in the past. They have two DC. They also live in a property owned by BIL's parents, however they have lied about that and fudged it in such a way that they get some housing benefit too. Both smoke heavily and BIL has an expensive hobby. Both have qualifications and are able bodied. They have no commute so no heavy car/petrol prices.

DH is soft, and feels guilty about the money, so I have sat him down with a benefits calculator to point out just how much disposable income they have, based on what they themselves have said. Smoking alone is more than DH's weekly spend on petrol.

I'm utterly sick of it. This isn't a benefits bashing thread, I've had to use them myself during a period of unemployment, but these two are cheeky fuckers of the first water and I'm sick of them. They used to try and dump their kids on us too - three weeks after my csection SIL was wailing down the phone at 7.30am, wanting DH to go round and look after her kids, seeing as he was on paternity leave and all. She wanted to go to Tesco

Tot up approximately what you have lent them over the years and tell them that you are unable to even consider lending them any more until they've paid you back so far.

I would reply saying it was a coincidence as you were about to ask them to repay what you had previously lent to them as you're skint at the moment.

@SaraNade I think it was your supercilious manner tbh

CFs to smoke anyway and ask for money to pay for their lung cancer sticks. 🤔

They absolutely are cheeky fuckers and you know this. As pointed out by others your problem is your husband. I’d hit the roof personally and go mental with all three of them but am not shy when it comes to things like this. I'm not always so forthcoming but this is so blatant and obvious I couldn’t not be.

You absolutely can get housing benefit if a family member owns the property, as long as you can show your tenancy agreement which ideally began way before the housing benefit.

I believe they may also ask you to show the corresponding payments coming out of your bank account over a period of time.

I did mean of the first water, does nobody read Georgette Heyer?

I did mean of the first water, does nobody read Georgette Heyer?

Or PG Wodehouse?

Wonderful to meet someone else who says "of the first water".

And they are CFs, OP.

I live in a coastal region and say it quite a bit. I wonder who I have confused the fuck out of?

I just assumed it was one of those expressions everybody used.

I have had my eyes opened.

Good idea about asking for money every time you see them!

@TheBitchOfTheVicar "I think OP made a typo, and meant "of the first order". Never heard 'water before. It is 'of the highest order', or 'of the first order'."

That..... is supercilious? But this.....

"you've never heard it before? God forbid you be wrong. A simple Google search could've sorted that out for you "

isn't?

Do you normally gaslight and accuse others of your own supercilious, troll-like nasty behaviour?