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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU over car DP got us?

289 replies

DrivingTat · 23/09/2019 11:30

Hi, all

I need to know how U you think I am over this.

So this Saturday my DP went to get us a new car (secondhand), I did not go with him as I had plans and was not that interested tbh. He sorted our last one out, which we scrapped last week as was too much to repair (head gasket)... It was a fiesta 54 plate.

So Saturday I went shopping with my friend, which was lovely! Had such a nice day as I had not seen her for awhile. Anyway half way through the day (about 1pm) I get a text from DP. "Got us a car sorted". I texted back without a thought to ask which one. I said "fab babe, we were just talking about you lol". That was it.

I get home about 8pm, feeling v relaxed and happy. So there I am telling DP about my day and he tells me about his. Yes the car I say let's see it!!

I go outside with DP and he points to it! I laughed my head off thinking he was taking the piss. He wasn't.

It's a blue 1989 escort, with one wheel trim and cassette radio. Why?! Just why?!

I don't like it, don't want it. It's my own fault for being so relaxed about buying a car and leaving it up to him, I know that but AIBU to be annoyed?

I have not said anything to him, because I don't know what to say. It's bought, taxed, insured. WWUD? Do I throw a fit and say take it back? Do I yell at him for not first asking to buy such a old car? Do I just live with it and get over it. It's been two days and I still feel so pissed off at him!! And myself.

We share one car, paid for out a joint account. We agreed on a budget, and yes he stuck to it. I really am not a car snob, I really did not think I cared as long as it got me from a-b but clearly I do. I just don't understand why that one. It's a tatty mess. How is it even still running!!!

OP posts:
steff13 · 23/09/2019 11:34

A 30 year old car?! What was your budget? Even with low miles, how much longer could it run?

SunnySideDownBriefly · 23/09/2019 11:34

Ohhhh gosh!

What was your budget? I don't think you have a leg to stand on as you left it completely up to him. Is he good with cars? Can he tinker and sort out problems?

dollydaydream114 · 23/09/2019 11:36

YANBU to think it's an odd choice of car, if you could afford something better. But YABU to be cross with him about it given that you showed no interest, didn't discuss it and didn't go to look at cars with him. Your lack of interest would have given the strong impression that you didn't care what car he chose and that he could therefore just pick whatever he fancied.

Shesellsseashellsontheseashore · 23/09/2019 11:37

Where did he even find it??

steff13 · 23/09/2019 11:40

It's a fair point that you didn't show any interest and therefore can't complain. But, in your defense, who would ever think that a 30 year old Ford Escort was an option?

Shesellsseashellsontheseashore · 23/09/2019 11:40

I agree you should have has some discussion with him. But I dont think it's unreasonable to think that he would buy something similar or slightly newer than the 54 reg one you have just scrapped.

What was your budget for him to get that?

Only thing that I can think is that he's been sold by the idea of getting a ford to do up? Is he into that sort of thing? There are many ford enthusiasts out there with old cars that they do up and take to car meets etc.

I wouldn't be happy either but then I love my cars so I have full say over what we have Grin

Blueoasis · 23/09/2019 11:40

Oh wow...

No point trying to take it back. I'd be shocked if that came from a dealer, it will be private seller. You've got no choice now, you're stuck with it.

I would yabu to not have gone, but he is an adult. Surely he can make informed decisions by himself and doesn't need his hand held by his mother or his partner? I'd blame him everytime it breaks down, which will be frequently.

Drogosnextwife · 23/09/2019 11:42

I think you can definitely go mad at him. Who goes to upgrade their car and seriously down grades. What exactly did he spend on it?

Drogosnextwife · 23/09/2019 11:44

I don't even think it's a discussion you would consider having tbh. It wouldn't even cross my mind to think to tell dp not to go and buy a 30 year old car Confused

SmellbowSmellbow123 · 23/09/2019 11:44

It's a blue 1989 escort, with one wheel trim and cassette radio - aka, VINTAGE!

😂😂😂

Oysterbabe · 23/09/2019 11:46

It must have cost a couple of hundred. What was your budget?!

PrincessConsuelaBananahamm0ck · 23/09/2019 11:48

It's an investment - a 1989 Ford Escort is a classic, I'd love it Grin. Not as my main family car though.....

NewStart571 · 23/09/2019 11:50

😂 I’m sorry but this can’t be real?! Did he pay extra because it’s ‘vintage’?

You really don’t have a leg to stand on here because you have him full control.

I’d be raging!

ElizaDee · 23/09/2019 11:50

How much did he spend on it?

cookiemonster5 · 23/09/2019 11:51

It's not a cosworth is it? They are pretty expensive, hold value well and and are good runners.

SunshineAngel · 23/09/2019 11:51

To be fair, I bet it'll be more reliable than newer cars. My grandparents always say the cars they had 30-40 years ago are miles better than they are today.

In your shoes, I would be gutted though.

bobstersmum · 23/09/2019 11:51

Yeah course

WarshipWarrior · 23/09/2019 11:52

Spill then! How much was it!

GinDaddy · 23/09/2019 11:53

Even as a car nut I just think that's a little silly - in the sense that unless it's one of the coveted Fords (cosworth, XR3i etc) then it's just an old car that will rust and need maintenance

YANBU

Bluntness100 · 23/09/2019 11:54

What was the budget op? And I'm assuming a typo as fiestas weren't around in the fifties.

Troels · 23/09/2019 11:54

Wow an original FORD pos. I'd make him get rid of it and be sensible about what you need as a family car, what a complete nutter.

ScreamingValenta · 23/09/2019 11:54

cassette radio

Cassette radios were great! I miss them.

iklboo · 23/09/2019 11:56

OP didn't mean the fiesta was from 1954 - she means a UK 54 registration plate - 2004/2005.

BanKittenHeels · 23/09/2019 11:57

Come on how much did he pay? £3 and a couple of those Monopoly vouchers from McDonalds?

familycourtq · 23/09/2019 11:57

YABVU - you said you didn't care what car but now you.

A lot of uninformed bollocks upthread about cars and age. There is no reason at all why it shouldn't be as reliable and last as well as 54 reg car - old doesn't automatically mean knackered.

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