To be comforted by finding a white feather?

[Whattsoccurring]

Does anyone believe that white feathers (especially in unusual places) are a sign that someone is looking after you? I got into my car today and there was one on the centre console between the drivers seat and passenger seat. I've been worrying about lots of different things lately and feeling very down, and I'd like to think it was a sign from my Grandma telling me that everything is going to be ok.

Also butterflies. My mum died earlier this year and I had a day off work in the summer as I was feeling really down.
I was sitting in the garden feeling sad when a butterly landed on my arm and just sat there for about 2 or 3 minutes
As I watched it fly away, I spotted a robin in the tree just staring at me. I don't care if it's nonsense- it brought me some peace

That's the thing, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks, it really boils down to what these signs mean for you.

Sorry for all your losses. It is awful. But it is really not spoken about, in true British upper lip fashion. Hide it all away, we will cope.

That has to change someday soon I think. We are humans with feelings and love. And grief.

We have 4 white runner ducks. Im forever finding white feathers blowing across the garden and drive.

Im with you op...it's what they represent...freedom. very comforting.

I don't think they represent freedom. To me they represent mums still here, somewhere, and I haven't lost her forever.

IN the early days/weeks months after dh died I saw feathers and they meant a lot

Now almost 9yrs on I still see a feather and think oh wow. ANs smile

It’s happy memories
AND if makes you happy then no one has the right to say it’s wrong

After mum died it took me 2 years to be able to listen to the cassette tape given to me by the undertakers from her funeral. I didn't realise the tape was only the music played at the funeral and not the actual words.
Anyway I had to play it in my car as it was the only place o could play a cassette tape. So this day I played it, cried buckets then went in the house. I didn't tell anyone I'd played it. That evening I went in my bedroom and found a small white feather beside my bed. Window was only opened a crack.

There was a white feather on the path when I opened my front door today and it really stood out. All I could think of was WW1 conscientious objectors (currently rewatching Downton Abbey 😆). Love the idea someone is watching over me but worried about the poster who said it appears when someone has died. Think I'll stick with the OPs interpretation.

I'm a believer. I lost two very dear people over the past couple of years and each time a white feather turned up in a very unexpected place within a couple of days. I completely understand why others are cynical but it makes me happy to think that it was a sign 😊

Thank you all for your replies. It's really lovely to hear your stories. As many of you say, it's what brings each of us comfort that matters, no matter what anyone else thinks. Thanks also for your opinions to those who have scoffed at what I think, but it really won't change my belief, it's really very sad to try to make someone feel bad who is taking comfort from something on a dark day.

Absolutely. If it comforts you, why on earth would anyone pour scorn on that?

53Claphands, that's interesting you said that, after mum died I found a white feather on my doorstep then 2 years later I found one in my room as described above.

I love this! I’ll lookout for white feathers now

“Thanks also for your opinions to those who have scoffed at what I think”

It may have been unwise to post in AIBU......

“I love this! I’ll lookout for white feathers now”

I promise you will see plenty.

A ground floor neighbour in my old flat had severe mental health issues and an alcoholic boyfriend. He died aged 43 and one day, when she was obviously in a bad way, she delightedly informed me that the angels had sent her tons of messages from him, as she'd been sitting outside, asking for a sign he was in Heaven and in response, she'd been showered in white feathers.

I didn't have the heart to mention that I'd been watching a Sparrowhawk dealing with an unfortunate dove/pigeon hybrid beside my chimney stack at exactly that time.

Robins love being near when soil is being turned - such as when digging large holes - along with the ideal environment a churchyard provides for them, their sheer visibility and noise of their song in winter, which I think accounts for their association with the dead.

And butterflies transform/metamorphose (as do dragonflies) and prefer to be out in good weather.

Even knowing those things, if it gives somebody comfort, fine. I feel better seeing birds and insects in any case. There's no harm in taking comfort wherever you can find it.

Maybe the angels were working with the sparrow Hawk??

I don't believe in that sort of thing at all. There is no need to be rude to the OP, but on the other hand tbh why start a thread on AIBU about this unless you are happy for people to come along and tell you that you are being unreasonable?

I take comfort it them, I always have. When my aunty died I had one of those free magazines put through the letterbox, she had only been dead 4 hours and I opened a random page, the first word I looked at was the name of her house. It is an unusual word and I’ve never seen it written anywhere before or since. It may be coincidence but to me that was her telling me she was still here.

I am a very rational person and know that the white feathers are probably from my pillow or from a bird but when I see a lone fluffy white feather I do always say hello to Dad.
Me and mum have seen white feathers in odd places and it makes us smile and gives us comfort, no harm in that.
Whatever helps you get through.

I’ve always thought it a right load of bollocks and rolled my eyes at a friend who believes this stuff. But then last year I took my dc blackberrying, and was thinking about my late Mum who was a great blackberrier, when a white feather floated down right in front of my nose. I became unaccountably choked up. God I miss her.

I would never tell anyone this in real life as they would either think I was a woo nutter or start going on about spirits and signs etc in a way that would just make me laugh.

Not long after we first moved into our house, I walked back into the living room to see a smallish white feather on the floor which hadn’t been there when I left the room. The patio door was open a crack for fresh air but if a feather had floated in it would have been a one in a million movement to get through that crack and land where it did.

Sometimes I like to think it was someone telling us we were going to be happy in our new home. Other times I just think, well, yeah, it was an unlikely thing to have happened but it MUST have floated through the tiny gap as that’s the only explanation.

My mum used to rip the piss by going 'Oh look, an ANGEL' whenever she saw a white feather. She died in 2010 and whenever I see one now I chuckle. I don't think she sent it to me though. How would she do that? Is she sitting in a cloud somewhere plucking a dove?

I may adopt ‘plucking a dove’ as a euphemism