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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Teenage boys, automatically up to no good

81 replies

gabsdot · 18/09/2019 19:32

My neighbour went into hospital on Monday do myself and my kids have been taking care of her dog. We've been going in several times a day to feed him and play with him and we've been taking him out for walks
This afternoon my 15 year old son went over with 4 friends to play with the dog. He let himself in and they all went inside for about 10 minutes.
When they came out a man from the house across the road started giving out and told them that if he saw them again he'd call the police.
I went round to have a word with him and explain that they had my permission and he said it didn't look good for the area to have teens going in and out of houses. I got the sense that the fact that 3 of them are black didn't help.
I keep thinking of what I should have said to him. I was way too nice to him.
So when you see a group of teenage boys do you assume they're up to no good.

OP posts:
chickenyhead · 19/09/2019 13:26

Yeah I was a bit hmmm about the skin colour connotations

But that may be because I live in an area where seeing black people is no more of an event than seeing white people. Teens usually in mixed groups and nobody really feels threatened by them (aside from other teens).

Yadid · 19/09/2019 13:27

I voted YANBU for the neighbour being suspicious, but at the same time YAB a little bit U to have allowed all the boys to go over unaccompanied to your neighbour's house.

I'm not sure how it came about. Maybe your son had his friend's visiting and you asked him to check on the dog and he said 'can I bring xy&z' and you said 'ye that's fine'. I could see that happening. But in hindsight, you should probably have thought it through a little bit.

gabsdot45 · 19/09/2019 15:16

Thank you for all your responses.
I'm sorry I didn't word the question properly I was just interested in seeing if people automatically assume teenage boys are causing trouble when they see them like the guy in question did.
My neighbour who is in hospital knows my son and his friends very well. In fact it was him she asked to look after the dog specifically because he's done it before.
The other neighbour doesn't know her at all and when she's feeling better I will tell her what happened. I'm sure the other neighbour will tell her too.

chickenyhead · 19/09/2019 15:23

In that case YANBU at all.

manicmij · 20/09/2019 13:54

Why couldn't the group just wait until your son came out with the dog and all take it fir a walk. Allowing all the friends into the house wasn't the best of ideas. The neighbour was right to be concerned. Just hope he didn't use abusive language towards the teenagers.

HeadintheiClouds · 20/09/2019 14:38

How could the man living across the road not know her at all? What a load of 🎱 🎾 🏀’s.
And there is no way she gave express permission for the whole gang to go into her house, that didn’t happen. Nice try.

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