AIBU not to sell her the clothes?

[MaggieMagpie357]

A fellow school mum has set up an online clothing company selling second hand clothes, nothing big, think more local and social media based than large online trading company.

I recently posted quite a lot of bundles of clothes for sale on FB Marketplace after an unsuccessful car boot sale, all really good quality stuff, in great condition. She has now approached me twice about buying some of these clothes.

The first time it was a dressing up costume, she didn't specify it was to sell on although I suspected that's what she might do. I joked that it wouldn't fit her daughter to give her the chance to own up and say, actually it's for my online store, but she just kept asking when she could pick it up. In the end I relented just to get rid of it, as it was a bit marked and no one else was interested in buying it.

Now she has messaged me about buying 4 more items. Part of me wants to message back and say, actually I'm not very comfortable with you buying these to sell on for your own profit. AIBU?

Bit of background - I have known this woman for 7 years, I really do not like her (which may be colouring my judgement!!!) but our daughters are friends and in the same class. I don't really see her any more as our kids are old enough to walk to school alone so no awkward school runs to worry about, but she does live nearby.

I'm torn between wanting to get rid of these clothes and definitely not wanting her to profit from my stuff - especially as she hasn't been honest about it!

so you wouldn't mind someone you know profiting from your stuff?

MN is UK based. Capitalism is a fundamental feature of our society.

May I ask what culture you come from, where making a profit is so taboo?

@Aprillygirl that's a bit low! She's not a charity, far from it. If she had approached me honestly and said, I'd like to buy them to sell on, I'd have less of a problem with it. But she hasn't done that. So I feel like she's been dishonest.

@donquixotedelamancha the important part of that quote was "someone you know"......

Why don't you just donate them to a charity shop and feel good about yourself instead of resentful that someone you don't like might make more money from them than you managed to.

@DontDribbleOnTheCarpet thanks for understanding where I'm coming from!

so you wouldn't mind someone you know profiting from your stuff?

Once they’re sold, they’re no longer ‘your stuff’.

Yes I'm being petty

Very much so.

Anyone who buys the things you’re selling could sell them on for more.

If you don’t like her then don’t sell to her. No big deal.

You're being ridiculous. She doesn't need to declare her intentions when buying clothes off Facebook. I wouldn't give a shit if someone made a profit from clothes they bought from me, good for them.

Name your Price OP .. she's doing you a favour by taking them too ..
saves you the hassle

the important part of that quote was "someone you know"

Ah, thank you. Do you live somewhere that it's not normal for people to have small businesses?

In the UK knowing people who buy and sell things for profit is very common. We have large buildings just for this purpose.

You didn't mention where you are from OP. It must be a fascinating culture to have such fundamentally different mores.

If I got rid of some of the junk in my house and made a little money, I couldn't possibly care less what the person did with the stuff.

@donquixotedelamancha oh dear, are you having a bad day?

You don’t like her very much? Read the post from Timeless again. She’s going to make diddly squat from your clothes. Let her waste her time and energy for peanuts.

@Aprillygirl that's a bit low! She's not a charity, far from it. If she had approached me honestly and said, I'd like to buy them to sell on, I'd have less of a problem with it. But she hasn't done that. So I feel like she's been dishonest.

No, she's a woman who's used her intuitive to set up her own little business. What's wrong with that? Are you bitter because you didn't think of it first? Perhaps she was not upfront with you because she knows what a mean spirited person you are.

You're being so weird about this.

Oh my god why do you care

You’re being totally ridiculous

Can’t see the problem. YABU.

Have you tried advertising on a specific brand selling page. For example if you have jojo maman bebe, boden, hatley, frugi... all those brands have selling groups on fb where clothes are sold for more than just basic fb marketplace

@BeanBag7 great tip, thanks! Had no idea there were specific groups for clothing brands

So you have already advertised some of the items on Facebook at a certain price but had no takers? But you would rather not sell them at all than sell them to her?

@MrsFezziwig no that's not the case. I've had other interest but she happened to comment first.

Must be a load of tat if you can't sell it at a car boot.

@ElevenSmiles not the case at all, we didn't sell much of anything at the car boot. Not enough footfall.

If you think it is worth more then sell it for more. If you think it is worth what you are asking for it then what happens to it after that. If I sold something for what I thought it was worth they could use it to line their dog bed for all I care. If I felt sentimental about something I would give it away to someone I hoped would appreciate it (or keep it).

What about agreeing to sell to her, but only if she buys the whole lot in one go, no cherry picking. You get a very easy sale, can throw in some 'less likely to be attractive items' and you get your money straight away. Job done.

YABVU