To think it isn’t ok for a man to call you a little bitch just because he’s gay?

[Rapidmama]

We’ve reclaimed that for our own no? If a woman refers to another women as a biatch or jokes oh you little bitch it does not carry the same weight as a man using that word?

I was called a little bitch yesterday but a man at WORK of all places. According to other office staff it’s ok because he’s gay and quite camp and that’s just who he is. I object to being called a bitch by anyone with a cock regardless of where they like to put it.

AIBU?

Not acceptable at all. It’s fine for him to call himself a bitch but not anyone else.

Not OK. I don't feel it's been reclaimed either.

Not appropriate language from ANYONE at work, IMO.

That's a good riposte from the PP ''hey, speak for yourself!'' or ''call yourself a little bitch'' !

omg,this is at WORK!>

I object to being called a bitch by anyone with a cock

I object to being called a bitch by anyone whether they have a cock or not. YANBU.

It’s not ok for anyone to say it IMO!

Yanbu. In my experience, generally gay men are must as misogynistic as straight men but for some unknown reason they're excused.

Anyone being called a bitch by anyone is highly unpleasant.

If a work colleague walks in and says “alright bitch” I wouldn’t bat an eyelid (it’s that kind of workplace and I’m talking about close colleagues.

If a straight man walked in and said alright bitch all hell would break loose.

He doesn’t get a pass just because he’s camp!

Yanbu

I have the exact same issue with a male work colleague who is also gay. I've been biting my tongue because I can't muster the energy to tell him to stop it. I will very soon

I agree with @shakirasma, I used to work with a gay man who used to consider himself so right on. ALways championing the rights of various groups but never the women within those groups. He was retelling a story about a woman who'd dropped her mobile phone down a drain and if he called her a 'bint' once he said he forty times. I was furious. It was unnecessary to call her a bint. I complained, not formally, I just, around the table at lunch, called him on it. He didn't back down. I said if I randomly called a man a fag or a dick with no information about them whatsoever, he'd call me out on that. I was right. I know I was. But from that moment on he was a spiteful little brat to me.

There was another gay man working there but he was a healthy personal, emotionally, with a good sense of himself, happy in himself and in his relationship and interestingly he couldn't bear the 'bint' man.

My mum calls me a bitch. As in “you lazy bitch” or “you cheeky bitch”, or “stop being a nosey bitch” . But never in an aggressive way; more as a joke. We’re from Glasgow.

But no man has ever said it to me

If a work colleague walks in and says “alright bitch” I wouldn’t bat an eyelid (it’s that kind of workplace and I’m talking about close colleagues).

I understand what you mean, but the problem is if you're allowing that sort of language in the workplace from certain colleagues, you're sending out the message that it's acceptable. You can't really complain about being called a bitch on the grounds of who said it - either it is acceptable in the workplace or it isn't.

It's not OK and being gay doesn't give him a free misogyny pass. I find bitch highly offensive, designed to keep women in their place.

No it's not okay.

Gay men are just as misogynistic as straight men, but they often get away with it and so can be more open. Being gay doesn't change the fact you are a man

I actually think YABU that you think its acceptable for a woman to say it but not a man. I think its weird to refer to other women as bitches and its not a term of endearment from anyone. I think if you talk to each other like that as a team in general you cant suddenly get offended when a man says it. Do the men know these imaginary rules you have of what each gender is allowed to say.
In my opinion its either an offensive term or it isnt, language isnt gendered.

Not ok for anyone.

Even in “that type” of workplace ( whatever that means) somewhere there is a complaint waiting to happen

If a work colleague walks in and says “alright bitch” I wouldn’t bat an eyelid (it’s that kind of workplace

Hohoho hehehe, just wiping the tears from my eyes. Sounds like a right laugh your workplace.

I don’t think men need it spelling out that bitch carries more weight when it’s said by a man than when it’s said by a woman.

It’s not the same thing at all but along similar lines, white people understand they can’t use the N word even if black people around them are using it amongst themselves. It doesn’t need explaining to you, you just know!

Not ok for anyone. I've never worked anywhere where close female colleagues would call each other bitches!

@lazylinguist, but you understand that some women do?

I actually think YABU that you think its acceptable for a woman to say it but not a man. I think its weird to refer to other women as bitches and its not a term of endearment from anyone. I think if you talk to each other like that as a team in general you cant suddenly get offended when a man says it. Do the men know these imaginary rules you have of what each gender is allowed to say.
In my opinion its either an offensive term or it isnt, language isnt gendered.

Agreed. YABVU to allow some people to use offensive language but not others based on what genitalia they have.