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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Waitrose Mum & Baby carpark - parking without child!

306 replies

NZMummy15 · 12/09/2019 15:07

So today I parked at Waitrose (in a normal car park as didn't have the kids) and noticed a middle aged woman had parked in the mum and baby carpark (with no kids).

I went up to her in Waitrose and said you've just parked in a m&b carpark but you don't have any children with you. To which she replied I have a baby it's just not with me and I'm in a hurry, anyway who are you the police? Long story short I said she shouldn't be there and also mentioned this to the customer service desk who didn't care.

When I was putting my groceries in to the car she came over to me and said I shouldn't judge without knowing the full story and she actually has medical problems. I said she should be parking in the disabled car park then if that's the case, but of course did feel a little bit bad about whether I handled it right and if she was telling the truth as she didn't mention any of that earlier?

What would you have done it that situation? It's making me feel really awful now, but on the flip side I know how awful it is when you can't get a car park and you have a small baby/child so it always gets my back up!

OP posts:

OtraCosaMariposa · 12/09/2019 15:55

My local Asda allows people with kids up to 12 to park in parent and child. My youngest is 11 and I haven't used it in years.

Might start again to wind up people like the OP who think they are the self-proclaimed parking police.

AlexaAmbidextra · 12/09/2019 15:56

I know how awful it is when you can't get a car park and you have a small baby/child

Awful? Oh do get a grip. How do you think people managed before p&c spaces?

scarbados · 12/09/2019 15:57

I have mobility issues which vary depending on weather and general health. We don't have a car so sometimes I get a lift to a 'further away' supermarket with a friend. So there's no blue badge to display but a real need for accessible parking. I'm not the only one who needs to park nearby and can't use disabled spaces.

I suggest you MYOBB in future and stop acting like you own the car park.

mumtooneyr · 12/09/2019 15:58

Awful? Oh do get a grip. How do you think people managed before p&c spaces?
But someone could say the same for the disabled 🤷🏻‍♀️ how did they manage?

theendoftheendoftheend · 12/09/2019 15:59

There's a very obvious reason why P&C spaces are placed so that young children aren't walking across the car park... think about it, it's not too hard to work it out.

Birdsfoottrefoil · 12/09/2019 15:59

Awful? Oh do get a grip. How do you think people managed before p&c spaces?

They didn’t use car seats. Awful selfish people putting their children in car seats cause this problem. How dare they worry about children’s safety!

LenoVintura · 12/09/2019 15:59

I often tell this story on these threads to illustrate just how batshit some people get about parent and child spaces: I went along to Tesco one evening around 9:30 to get a newspaper. I knew I was just going to nip to the kiosk, the car park had no more than half a dozen cars in it, one of which was in a parent space. The driver was busy putting her shopping into the boot while holding a biggish baby / toddler in her arms.

I pulled in to the space nearest the door, which was also a parent space, zoomed in to the kiosk (just inside the main entrance) got the paper and came out no more than a minute or two later. The woman with the baby was shrieking "help me, someone, help me". Naturally I was very concerned so started towards her. She continued to shriek "Somebody, somebody do something about this woman". At that point, to my horror, it dawned on me that she was shrieking about me. She went on to shout for security and shouted at me "what do you think you're doing, that space is for people with children". That was all bad enough and maybe if she'd sounded angry, then I would have thought well, batshit, but hey ho. However it was that she was more shrieking in a crying sort of way, like she was being attacked or something.

Luckily nobody came out of the shop and I drove away without engaging but wow, really? Stark raving bonkers. That's how people feel about parent spaces. I've never used one since, even at the dead of night in a petrol station. Nope. Too many weirdos about .

Venger · 12/09/2019 16:00

she came over to me and said I shouldn't judge without knowing the full story and she actually has medical problems. I said she should be parking in the disabled car park then if that's the case, but of course did feel a little bit bad about whether I handled it right and if she was telling the truth as she didn't mention any of that earlier?

She didn't mention it because it's none of your business. Unless you are employed by Waitrose as a carpark attendant then you've no right to question people about their parking.

BiologyIsReal · 12/09/2019 16:01

I know how awful it is when you can't get a car park and you have a small baby/child

I'm wondering how us older people with our kids ever managed to survive, what with having no parent and child spaces. Yet we did and the world kept turning.

It is good, of course, that there is more thoughtfulness and more facilities but awful - no, a tad inconvenient more like.

Whoops75 · 12/09/2019 16:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Haffiana · 12/09/2019 16:04

OP, you really should carry a visible net curtain with you at all times.

Birdsfoottrefoil · 12/09/2019 16:05

I'm wondering how us older people with our kids ever managed to survive, what with having no parent and child spaces. Yet we did and the world kept turning

We didn’t have these spaces, didn’t use seat belts in cars, were put on our fronts to sleep, drank unpasteurised milk, didn’t have smoke alarms in the house, household chemicals were kept under the sink and no safety caps, no stair gates, etc etc and yet I survived... but some children didn’t and of course they are not here to say so.

Undies1990 · 12/09/2019 16:05

What would I have done? Nothing as it's none of my business and I have got more important things to worry about.

Sirzy · 12/09/2019 16:06

Unless your employed as a parking warden for that car park then keep your nose out.

AlexaAmbidextra · 12/09/2019 16:06

But someone could say the same for the disabled 🤷🏻‍♀️ how did they manage?

Please tell me you aren’t honestly comparing the two. Really? Let me spell it out for you. You choose to have children. You do not choose to have a fucking disability.

Original poster

NZMummy15 · 12/09/2019 16:10

Thanks so much Mums, there are much nicer ways to say what you have just said, so much for a supportive community! I guess just like I didn't know about that women's background and maybe judged too quickly, you have just done the same thing to me without knowing anything about my life and me as a person (but don't agree two wrongs make a right), and I said I was feeling bad about it. Sometimes Mums struggle mentally and emotionally and getting a parking space where they can get out of their car easily and safely is a big deal, isn't about how far you need to walk.

OP posts:

Jesse70 · 12/09/2019 16:10

Why would u even care

PurpleDaisies · 12/09/2019 16:11

Sometimes Mums struggle mentally and emotionally and getting a parking space where they can get out of their car easily and safely is a big deal, isn't about how far you need to walk.

Sometimes people with disabilities don’t like to be accosted in Waitrose by self appointed parking wardens.

Pukkatea · 12/09/2019 16:11

You actually went to customer services about it...

You need a hobby

GrimalkinsCrone · 12/09/2019 16:11

I did use car seats, Birdsfoot It stayed in the car and one removed the child from it. As for children in a car park, it’s a good opportunity to teach them how to be alert and keep safe. There’s a reason why the road accident stats for 11-12 year olds spike. No road sense and travelling to school unaccompanied.

Tonnerre · 12/09/2019 16:12

OP, when you ask whether you were being unreasonable in relation to this specific incident, we don't need to know all about your life and you as a person to answer your question.

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 12/09/2019 16:13

Sometimes Mums struggle mentally and emotionally and getting a parking space where they can get out of their car easily and safely is a big deal

So do disabled people but hey ho, Mums are so much more important.

shearwater · 12/09/2019 16:14

That is a batshit response, but you were also very lazy and entitled to use the space, Leno.

shearwater · 12/09/2019 16:15

According to mumsnet, parent and child places are for disabled people to park in. It is the height of selfishness to consider your child’s safety and park in one if you have a child. Everyone parking in such a space will have a disability but no blue badge. There should be absolutely no judgement or attempt to police these places. You should also mind your own business if you see a child being abused or know when someone is fraudulently claiming benefits. But feel totally free to judge them if they give their child a fruit shoot

Well said, Birds!

Derbee · 12/09/2019 16:15

@NZMummy15 YANBU for feeling she shouldn’t park there. YABU for harrassing a fellow shopper in a supermarket.

And YABVVVVVVVVVU to keep referring to them a mother and baby spaces, and going on about how mums need this or mums need that. Dad’s requirements are just as valid, and the correct term is PARENT.

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