Do children with SAHMs miss out on nursery benefits?

[omikron]

Is there anything a nursery can offer that a SAHM can't? And vice versa?

Something like 95% of children take up a nursery/childminder preschool place for their 15 hours so very few miss out.

I wasn’t a SAHM but kid was at home with a nanny until she went to school . Nanny and I when not working took her to local events , indoor play areas etc so she met up with other kids . My personal view was and is that she didn’t miss out .

They definitely get less social interaction, but in my opinion that’s overrated for little ones anyway. Once my DD is 3-4 I’ll send her to nursery but she’s happy at the moment without other children around.

They don't get their free hours until they're 2 though do they?

Is there anything a nursery can offer that a SAHM can't?

The company of a group of children ...

Mine were fine. I took them to lots of playgroups

Term after they turn 3.

Absolutely not until theyre 3.

IF a sahm is repsonding to childs needs and interacting with their child, taking them to playgroups/mixing with friends children etc I still think its far preferable to do that yourself (or a nany dedicated to the kids) rather than a nursery. Not that a nursery is at all bad and we used it a little after 3 yrs old, but jsut that its not in the slightest necessary!

I remember reading that children's brains aren't developed enough to benefit cognitively from social interaction with groups of children etc until at least 18 months but usually closer to 30 months. What they need for cognitive development is a close attachment to their caregiver. They lose nothing by not attending nursery until three unless from a socioeconomically deprived background.

It depends on age . For 0-2 years I think a carer's consistent one to one attention is best. From 2 onwards my children wanted to play with other children. So I put them in nursery part time. I personally was not up for planning play dates and watching them play from a distance! It was much easier for them to have the opportunity to make friends and exert a bit of independence at nursery. The environment is designed for them. E.g small tables, toilets, ..., etc.

In case it's of interest OP. It's fairly old, but I think still relevant.

www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2010/oct/02/nurseries-childcare-pre-school-cortisol

Sometimes free hours are available from 2. Usually where its deemed beneficial for the child. Someone I know was offered it. There was a bug family tradegy and the parents werent coping well (completely to be expected) SS became involved purely to support and offered them this.

Otherwise its 3.

Can we please not start this up again? Can you search some precious threads. The division, which rapidly turns to derision, is tedious.

*Is there anything a nursery can offer that a SAHM can't?

The company of a group of children ...*

Playgroups and Softplay offer that though..

I have friends with DC the same age as dd who are SAHPs and their children show very different developments to Dd. Dd shared at a young age, has the physical development of a child a year older than her and to an extent can form friendships (she recognises children she sees often and smiles and hugs them). Stay at home children don't do this IME. Dd has learned so much from watching older children.

I personally think staying at home is fine until 3. I think ideally they will have some time with other children at nursery/pre school beyond that in order to learn things like sharing/taking turns and developing relationships. Otherwise school will be a shock. In my opinion for the first two years they don't need it.

Of course the caveat is that you have to do things with them, play with them, take them to the park, playgroups, maybe swimming etc. We have also aways met up with friends so they are used to other families with adults and children.

I sah with my toddler (2, she’ll do two mornings a week at a local nursery soon). I am very sensitive to how she is compared to other kids because literally everyone else is in childcare and I haven’t seen any negative differences - she sees one or more other kids each day (playgroups, playground, meet-ups with friends, classes), runs off happily when appropriate, can communicate with other adults, can listen to instructions. There’s some stuff that she is quite advanced at and I (privately, unless asked!) attribute it to the fact that she’s had a lot of one-to-one time.

There are probably some kids that need one type of setting or another, but I don’t think it’s universal if their home care is good enough.

I think around 90%of children go to nursery at 3. Before then there are lots of parent and child groups. My DD is a SAHM and her children certianly don't miss out on social interaction. They go to lots of different activiities as well as go to the park and meet up with other parents and children. The term after they are 3 they have gone to nursery in the mornings.

has the physical development of a child a year older than her

How so?

Under 2 year olds don't benefit from nursery at all unless they're from linguistically or financially deprived households or their sahp is disengaged.

If a sahp talks to their child and involves them in every aspect of their day (the old fashioned "mummy's little helper" whole talking, talking, talking about everything, reads to them daily plus gets out and about each day for a walk, to the shops, and ideally to a toddler's group or to play at a friend's or family member's house with children, they will do at least as well as a child in nursery.

Children of 3+ benefit from a nursery or preschool setting arguably, but under 3s don't unless coming from a below par home environment (which may be due to financial restraints or illness, not the parent's fault necessarily).

There's nothing wrong with nursery and a good nursery is as good as a sahp too - but not better than an engaged, motivated, fairly well educated sahp.

No need to put an under 3 into nursery unless the parents need to work or need the time to recharge.

Playgroups and Softplay offer that though

Soft play doesn't offer that unless you regularly go with the same children they need time to develop and maintain relationships. Playgroup can of course but your child will still have you there too. How they interact will be different when you are not around. Going from being with you full-time to being in school full time will be a big shock and seems a bit unfair.

Mine never went ,never left them. Didn’t even go school till age 10 ..all fine now ,proper jobs ,normal relationships all round .

As PP said: The research suggests kids under 3 benefit from consistent one on one attention from a single special adult. So SAHM, Nanny or Childminder are ideal.
After 3, they seem to benefit from a structured environment with a group of other kids, for a least some of the time.
There's some research that suggest kids from deprived backgrounds benefit from a nursery setting from 2. But only if the setting is good quality.
You have to bear in mind though that this research concerns statistical outcomes among large groups of kids. You know your own child best.

I actually wrote papers on this. Basically in economic (life) outcomes there is no difference what so ever. The main differences appear around 3/4 where those in nursery show higher "intelligence" however more aggression. So in short, with all the research, I'll do whatever suits my child best when the time comes.