To ask the maddest thing your mother ever told you about parenting?

[1FineDane]

Just reminiscing and I was blessed with a very placid baby. She never really cried, she'd mooch, and I'd get up and pick her up.
After about 6 weeks watching this, my DM, finally unable to contain herself shouts at me 'YOU NEED TO LET THAT CHILD CRY - SHE NEEDS TO CLEAR HER LUNGS!!!'.

I was never an attachment parent type, BF for 5.5 weeks only, was a single mother, but got the advice to give attention during the day so that they associate day time with attention, and give no attention at night, so mercifully, taking that advice, she also slept through the night (5 hours from about 6 weeks which felt like a gift) and then it just got longer over time. So I was FAR from a fussy mother, but my mother seemed to want me to leave her mooching until she launched into full blown crying - so she could......... clear her lungs lol.

Any other belters you've received?

Don’t have kids—they ruin your life 😥

It took me until I was in my mid thirties to live a life counter to her suggestion. Miraculously, we have gone on to develop a close relationship.

She is kind of correct in the sense of a newborn crying when born to clear the lungs of fluid so her comment is loosely based on fact but I highly doubt baby needs to clear their lungs at 6weeks!

I have DS11, DD7 and DS 9wks.... All three have had reflux/colicky babies and my eldest would only settle by bouncing quite vigorously. He was diagnosed with ASD two years ago. My mother commented when I was pregnant that I better rethink my settling strategies before DS2 was born as I most likely gave my son autism by bouncing him so much

I am now NC and she has never met my newborn.

Smoke if you want an easy birth.
Half a stout every day for iron.
Don't breastfeed it starves the baby and is attention seeking.
Spoonful of brandy and Calpol every night at 7 to sleep train....

Mine of dangerous information was my Mum.

Mine told me that dealing with pooey nappies wasn't so bad when it was your own child because you love them so much.

Oh mine told me to keep smoking too as the baby won't be as big lol. (I did do this btw, but she was an emergency c section).

Was also told to give up that 'STUPID' breastfeeding.

Mine told me that dealing with pooey nappies wasn't so bad when it was your own child because you love them so much.

That was the greatest lie ever told lol.
I remember nearly vomiting over some of her nappies, much and all as I loved her!

'Chocolate buttons are perfectly fine for a 6 week old. You all had them and you're all fine.' Followed by angry sulking because I wouldn't allow her to feed them to my baby.

Boys will get away with more (misbehaviour) as it's a man's world - and I need to simply accept that.

@mawof3soontobe interestingly (to me) our school mental health (CAMHs) told me that bouncing is great for ASD children because it disperses a build up in their brain and they find it comforting. We’ve been advised to give frustrated children with ASD bouncing activities.

I needed to find out if my eldest was allergic to anything, so I should feed her exclusively on one type of food for a month and if she reacted badly, she was allergic. So I should feed her nothing but carrots and if she turned orange, she was allergic. Claimed it was what her friend did with her children and it worked for her when I told her I wouldn't be doing that. Friend said she did no such thing!

@ImNotYourGranny is your mum also my mum? I have also been given this gem of advice!

Aged 1, I mentioned that dd hadn't ever had ice cream, so I didn't know whether she'd like it.
'Oh she's had it loads of times at my house and she loves it!' says my mother.

I wanted to be the one to give her her first ice cream!

My baby's still in utero, and yet the advice has started.

When I told my mother I was pregnant, she told me I'd have to get rid of some of my animals. When I asked her why she said because there'd be too much mess. The next time I spoke to her she asked if the midwife had told me to get rid of them yet. When I did meet my midwife I specifically put the question to her and she just laughed. I did point out that, even if she had said I needed to, I would have refused anyway, but at least now I could go and pass it on to my mother. Said mother was not impressed.

Latest was DM planning on buying clothes for the wee one. She's going to buy trousers, as babies 'need' trousers. I pointed out I am planning on keeping them in sleepsuits for as long as possible, as both I and DP think they're easier to deal with, and comfier for baby, but no, I still 'need' trousers.

My older sister was apparently out of nappies and wearing knickers at nine months old.

Not my mum but my gran. She told me to put Carnation evaporated milk in the formula for a better feed. It was what doctors had told her to do in the 1940s

@Blondebombsite83 yes I've since been told this from my own CAMHS team tempted to break NC just to gloat but its so not worth it!

I'm also BFing this baby and wasn't supported enough to (and was very young and easily led) with the other two. I've been told I'm spoiling him, letting him use me aw a dummy, making a rod for my own back ill never have babysitters, he will sleep better on formula, after six months there's no benefit for them, I'm just doing it for selfish reasons and a ton of other ridiculous comments.

Other advise includes letting the baby cry it out since birth!!!!

Told me you weren’t a proper woman until you gave birth to a son as only real women can carry boys.
Breastfeeding was only what poor people did.
Floated that she weaned me at 6 weeks old on mince and tatties not grave but proper mince (I was 2 month prem too).

Apparently I slept for 17 hours a day
I should give 3 month old DD1 ice cream, chocolate buttons and lucozade just to see her face!

My mum watched me pipette tiny amounts of milk into DS2's mouth because due to many complications he refused to feed. After managing to get only about 30ml into him in 2 hours she said: 'If that had been my baby he'd be dead by now. I'd never have been bothered to do all that.'
Thanks mum. Helpful.

it's a wonder the human race has served with some of these gems 'nice idea mum, but no thanks !'

My mil “that baby only cries as much as he does because you pick him up ”

No actually it turns out he had CMPA and reflux so there
(We are nc with her. Not for this reason though)

My Nan tried to say it too, but I shot her down quickly and she hasn’t said anything else

My mum wouldn’t dare to say anything as like above, I would point out she was a fucking idiot and it was my baby so my chance to make mistakes.

My mother had this weird fixation that my BF baby might not be hungry, just thirsty. Instead of feeding her I should try giving her boiled water off a spoon.
I couldn't imagine faffing about with that.

She also used to dress my daughter up in a woolly hat and mittens, even in summer, which, to my secret smug satisfaction, she'd remove herself.
She managed to get one hand free of a tightly swaddled sheet the midwife wrapped her up in the night she was born

Some of the advice upthread - definitely not all; some - is the advice given to parents by qualified health care professionals years ago. Cooled, boiled water from a spoon, 'spoiling' a baby by picking it up - and the GP told my mum to eat a pork pie and drink Guinness during pregnancy.

"Boys will get away with more (misbehaviour) as it's a man's world - and I need to simply accept that." Sadly not necessarily wrong!

My mum had banged on for years that she had "completely breastfed" siblings and I, then when I had dd at 6 WEEKS she started saying that I'd "completely breastfed" dd now and it was pointless continuing past this stage!

I bf dd until she was almost 10 months and only stopped then because my milk dried due to a medical condition.

Mine told me that my baby would cry her body weight off!!

Errm, nope. Certainly not if fed regularly and adequately, normally on demand or as quickly as possible after calling for a feed.