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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To want a refund straight away?

97 replies

ErmmmmNo · 08/09/2019 15:30

My wedding was yesterday.

We got to the venue and the DJ hadn't turned up.

He had called the venue an hour before hand to say his car had broken down so wasn't going to make it. Luckily, the woman who ran the venue was brilliant and got straight on the phone to local DJs and managed to find someone who got there an hour after the reception started.

The new DJ was good and we had a brilliant night.

However, I obviously now need to pay this new DJ but had already paid the other who didn't show (£350).

He's obviously agreed to refund me but it won't be until next week as he needs to pay cash into the bank...

I paid him via bank transfer. AIBU to say, no I want it sending over today/first thing tomorrow at the latest via online banking which is how I sent it to him.

I'm pretty pissed off about the whole thing anyway so I would prefer to get the money back asap so I'm not out of pocket for the emergency DJ!

OP posts:

Crunchymum · 08/09/2019 22:04

What was the difference in cost?

Do you have nothing better to do the day after your wedding than MN about this?

OhDon · 08/09/2019 22:30

Yes so very unreasonable to expect someone who let you down to refund you straight away so you don't have to be out of pocket...

It is possible to transfer funds on a weekend you know? If you run a business involving transfer of money you really should be using online banking.

People are so strange. Of course you're annoyed! Most normal people would be.

MiddleClassProblem · 08/09/2019 22:38

And if he used my money to fix his car then he should have been there...

I really need the number of your super speedy mechanic

OhDon · 08/09/2019 22:46

Well no sorry if it was between fixing his car or refunding the money then the client they let down should take priority.

FrauHaribo · 08/09/2019 22:59

Aridane

Of course it is! Do you expect, cinemas or theatres, say, to keep your ticket money in a special trust fund pending you wobbling along to the actual performance?

of course not, but I expect an immediate refund if they cancel the screening, the play or the performance, don't you?
Or do you gift them what you have paid if they cancel for whatever reason?

Evilspiritgin · 08/09/2019 23:04

That’s the last two weekends where someone has the day after their wedding come straight onto mn and write a post about a piddling problem

Op he’s said he will be sending your money back, he rang and told the venue in time for them to find someone else, try and enjoy the start of your marriage

Thegreymethod · 09/09/2019 00:15

I understand the frustration but if he's saying he needs to pay money into the bank to refund you it means he doesn't have it in the bank, just because you sent it him recently doesn't mean he still has it you don't know his circumstances. Do you have the money to pay the new DJ? If you do just pay him and wait for your money and enjoy being a newly wed. If he was being dishonest I'd have thought he'd have just not showed up not rang you to let you know.

melj1213 · 09/09/2019 04:19

TBH I dont see why it all has to be immediate. It's a day after the event, I'm sure the replacement DJ will be willing to wait 48hrs for payment.

The emergency DJ clearly knows they were a (very) last minute replacement so I'm sure that he would understand if you cant pay till next week due to waiting for the refund from the original DJ. Or, since it was the venue that actually hired the replacement I am sure they would understand a day or two delay while you finalise the details with the venue etc.

I used to work in a hotel and if a DJ was booked via the hotel as part of the event package and they cancelled then we would ring round our pool of regular event DJs to find someone to cover. We would pay the new DJ on the day from hotel funds and get the refund back from the original DJ later.

If it wasnt part of the package, and the organisers booked their own DJ, we would do our best to find a replacement but we wouldn't pay for them. We would still call round our pool of DJs but if it was a 3rd party booking they all knew they may not be paid right away and would just invoice the event organiser after the event.

adaline · 09/09/2019 05:20

of course not, but I expect an immediate refund

Refunds don't go through immediately though so you'd still be waiting 3-5 days to get your money back.

OP - you just got married. Don't you have better things to be doing than worrying about this? Just pay the DJ and if the old one doesn't refund your money next week, then you can start stressing!

SoupDragon · 09/09/2019 07:40

it's more the 'just pay the second DJ out of your own money' etc... Like yes obviously that's what I intend to do

You only "intend to"? The original DJ also intends to refund you. It's no different.

He needs to pay cash into the bank first. The time to get angry is if that doesn't happen.

Tessabelle74 · 09/09/2019 08:04

Wouldn't it be lovely if we all had £350 spare just sitting in our accounts ready to transfer? In real life, most of us have bills to pay etc so your money may well have gone straight out again to pay rent, buy food or put petrol in his car to get to your reception, now he'll need money to fix his car. Your £350 may have been all he earned that week or even that month. Give the guy a break, a refund from huge companies like Tesco can take up to 7 days!

FrauHaribo · 09/09/2019 13:52

Wouldn't it be lovely if we all had £350 spare just sitting in our accounts ready to transfer?

wouldn't it just. So why is the OP expected to find the cash to pay someone else because her original supplier has been unprofessional and is very slow to refund her?
It's not up to the OP to pay for the car to be fixed - if it even needs to be repaired in the first place. And what about the cover DJ? he doesn't have bills, he's supposed to wait whilst HE did the job?

Thecatsatemychristmastree · 09/09/2019 14:52

If the 1st DJ was a legitimate one, wouldn't he have insurance in case things like this happen?? Our venue strongly suggested using an insured musician for this very reason.

Tessabelle74 · 09/09/2019 16:55

FrauHaribo
So why is the OP expected to find the cash to pay someone else because her original supplier has been unprofessional and is very slow to refund her?
The replacement DJ hasn't been paid yet, it's been less than 48 hours since the wedding and as I said, a big company won't process a redfund in less than 5-7 days. I'm sure if the op actually spoke to the original DJ rather than the mumsnet coven she could sort a direct payment between DJ's

Hirsutefirs · 09/09/2019 17:02

If it makes you feel any better, I reckon he lied about the car.

He played another gig.

FrauHaribo · 09/09/2019 17:07

Of course he lied about the car, or he would have at least ask if someone could help with coming from and to the venue!

MummytoCSJH · 09/09/2019 17:17

I don't think either of you are being 'unreasonable' as such. It's obviously stressed you out. Luckily it didn't ruin your party! Unfortunately, if he doesn't have it in the bank there's not much to be done is there. I often don't have money in the bank and have to go put cash in if I need to transfer or pay online - that's what it's like when you live month to month. There seem to be a few here that haven't experienced that. The fact he has spent it is neither here nor there - presumably up until the emergency he thought he would be doing the job and therefore it was his money, expecting him to not pay his bills or whatever just in case of an emergency would be ridiculous. Some people pay for things months upfront - does that mean the money can't be spent until after the service has been done? No, of course it doesn't. It's possible but very unlikely (and a bit ridiculous to think) he planned this just so he could hang on to your money for just a few extra days - for what purpose?! He has said he will refund you asap, if he doesn't, small claims court. You won't be out of pocket because you will get the money back.

MummytoCSJH · 09/09/2019 17:20

'Of course not, but I expect an immediate refund if they cancel, ..., don't you?'

No actually, most business refunds advise that they take 3-5 working days.

BasinHaircut · 10/09/2019 18:16

Wandering back in to see if it was all a storm in a teacup........

adaline · 10/09/2019 19:09

So why is the OP expected to find the cash to pay someone else because her original supplier has been unprofessional and is very slow to refund her?

Slow to refund her? It's been two business days! Most businesses advise refunds take 5-7 days to process.

BasinHaircut · 10/09/2019 20:34

It had been zero business days when OP started the thread. It had been about 12 hours

Aridane · 14/09/2019 11:51

Did you get your refund once working days resumed?

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