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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want a refund straight away?

97 replies

ErmmmmNo · 08/09/2019 15:30

My wedding was yesterday.

We got to the venue and the DJ hadn't turned up.

He had called the venue an hour before hand to say his car had broken down so wasn't going to make it. Luckily, the woman who ran the venue was brilliant and got straight on the phone to local DJs and managed to find someone who got there an hour after the reception started.

The new DJ was good and we had a brilliant night.

However, I obviously now need to pay this new DJ but had already paid the other who didn't show (£350).

He's obviously agreed to refund me but it won't be until next week as he needs to pay cash into the bank...

I paid him via bank transfer. AIBU to say, no I want it sending over today/first thing tomorrow at the latest via online banking which is how I sent it to him.

I'm pretty pissed off about the whole thing anyway so I would prefer to get the money back asap so I'm not out of pocket for the emergency DJ!

OP posts:
Aridane · 08/09/2019 17:29

However. It is a Sunday. I would wait till tomorrow midday and if he doesn’t return. I would say I’m ringing the police for theft

ha Ha ha ha

Original poster
ErmmmmNo · 08/09/2019 17:32

Lino, I absolutely agree about the replacement, he was fantastic and I'm so grateful he was able to help us. I will be paying him. It's just bloody annoying that it's going to leave us short if we don't get a refund until whenever from the 1st.

Our venue were so helpful too.

OP posts:
Aridane · 08/09/2019 17:32

Won’t your wedding insurance cover it?

Sighs

No - wedding insurance doesn't cover repayment of money 5 days later than OP would have liked

Aridane · 08/09/2019 17:35

What did the contract say?

You know - I guess it said what he would do and how much it cost, not what happens if he was a no show

Aridane · 08/09/2019 17:37

I wouldn’t just want a refund I’d sue the bastard!

for what? OP got an excellent replacement and unless they were more expensive, there is nothing to sue about!

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 08/09/2019 17:40

unless they were more expensive, there is nothing to sue about!

To be fair I would presume anyone agreeing to cover a wedding with a few hours notice could basically ask what ever price they wanted so its very likely indeed he was more expensive than the original DJ.

I would be expecting the £350 back plus the extra money the Op and her DH have had to spend on the new DJ.

Skittlenommer · 08/09/2019 17:44

I wouldn’t just want a refund I’d sue the bastard!

for what? OP got an excellent replacement and unless they were more expensive, there is nothing to sue about!

Of course there is. It was more luck than judgement that an alternative was able to be sourced. I’d want a full refund plus compensation especially as this happened on a wedding day. They lost an hour of music at the reception as new DJ was last minute so I’d want to be compensated for this too.

Dieu · 08/09/2019 18:11

I too don't understand why he can't just return the money by bank transfer. It takes minutes, if that Confused

proseccoaficionado · 08/09/2019 18:14

@Skittlenommer finally someone agreeing there's been a loss. Why the f do we sign contracts if you aren't actually liable for anything?

coconuttelegraph · 08/09/2019 18:39

I too don't understand why he can't just return the money by bank transfer. It takes minutes, if that

I assume you aren't so stupid that you can't comprehend that he might have spent the money and might no longer have it available in his bank account to transfer back today. Not everyone has spare money sitting around you know.

coconuttelegraph · 08/09/2019 18:42

Do DJs still travel with large speakers, light systems etc? My only recent experience is school discos and the DJs always turn up with a van full of stuff.

I guess it's not that easy to find a vehicle big enough at no notice to get the equipment to the venue and leave the car by the side of the road or whereever it was, it simply isn't always possible to find a solution to all problems.

TheQueef · 08/09/2019 18:44

I seem to remember, in my dusty mind somewhere, that you can sue for loss of enjoyment with weddings same as holidays. Expectation of enjoyment of summat.

Anyway don't she and stop making it an issue.

FrauHaribo · 08/09/2019 19:01

Not everyone has spare money sitting around you know.

spending money that is not yours is theft, surely?
Until you have done whatever you were paid to do, the money is not yours to spend, is it?

Croquembou · 08/09/2019 19:05

spending money that is not yours is theft, surely?

No, theft is a specific crime - the intention of permanently depriving someone of property. This is an unfulfilled contract and a civil, not criminal matter.

Original poster
ErmmmmNo · 08/09/2019 19:05

Not everyone has spare money sitting around you know

Funny that because I'm expected to!

OP posts:
Grobagsforever · 08/09/2019 19:09

Jesus fucking Christ. Get a grip. You should be on cloud 9 right now not losing your shit over something so minor. Heaven help you when you have a real problem.

Good luck OP's DH, you're going to need it

littlepaddypaws · 08/09/2019 19:38

gro are you suggesting op might be back on here in a years time complaining about something else ?

coconuttelegraph · 08/09/2019 19:43

Not everyone has spare money sitting around you know

Funny that because I'm expected to!

That wasn't my point at all, I haven't said you should pay DJ no 2 today, I was replying to the poster who expressed disbelief that DJ no 1 might not be able to repay you within 12 hours of the wedding.

Has DJ no2 asked for payment immediately?

Aridane · 08/09/2019 19:49

Until you have done whatever you were paid to do, the money is not yours to spend, is it?

Of course it is! Do you expect, cinemas or theatres, say, to keep your ticket money in a special trust fund pending you wobbling along to the actual performance? Or school fees not to be spent pending conclusion of the academic year?

Original poster
ErmmmmNo · 08/09/2019 20:01

I'm not necessarily replying to you coconut, it's more the 'just pay the second DJ out of your own money' etc... Like yes obviously that's what I intend to do but I don't have tonnes of spare cash lying around either. Everyone is very keen to tell me how unreasonable I am to suggest that the 1st DJ might have enough money in his bank to refund me straight away but not at the idea that I may not have lots of spare funds to pay his replacement!

OP posts:
StupidRazor · 08/09/2019 20:11

I don't really get what the OP has said that is so unreasonable?

She's annoyed that her DJ cancelled an hour before her wedding - understandable whether or not there's a genuine reason.

She's worried because she has to find spare funds to pay a replacement DJ through no fault of her own - perfectly understandable.

She's not the one who's suggested anything ridiculous like calling the police for theft etc... She's not even said she's going to complain or leave a bad review for the DJ. She just wants her money back asap which is understandable!

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 08/09/2019 20:19

I don't really get what the OP has said that is so unreasonable?

Me either.

Have you heard back from him yet OP? Did he say he would be sorting it out tomorrow morning because given the situation and the fact you paid him in good faith I think sorting it out ASAP is the very least he could do.

Dieu · 08/09/2019 21:41

@coconuttelegraph

Hardly the OP's fault or responsibility.

Someone as rude as you would be on the DJ's side however!

Aridane · 08/09/2019 21:56

Where some of us think the OP is being unreasonable is expecting an immediate same day transfer at the weekend

saffy1234 · 08/09/2019 21:58

Me again
I cannot believe people think that @ErmmmmNo is BU