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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To never allow these people to stay at my house again? (Long)

93 replies

Turniptracker · 07/09/2019 22:21

Long story so apologies in advance.

Last night I had three friends over for a girls night, all in mid to late twenties, I will call them Annie, John and Sally. I had specified beforehand that I didn't mind hosting but really didnt want people to stay (they live fairly locally) as I had a lot to do the next day. However two people said they would need to leave at 7 the next morning so I said it would be ok for them to stay.

It started well, we had a couple of gin and tonics while enjoying some food and watched a film. Then we had a few more drinks and decided to play a game. "Annie" suddenly got really stroppy during the game, complained everyone was talking over her and she "wasn't interested anymore". Retired to her corner of the sofa, ignoring everyone and went on her phone. Told everyone to leave her alone.
I absolutely hate conflict and this made me feel really uncomfortable in my own home so it upset me. I packed the game up, said I wasn't continuing, and left the room to clear the kitchen and escape the drama. John tried to cheer her up but Annie kept telling her to leave her alone. I was annoyed this girl was being petty and was ruining what had been a nice night so I told her directly to get over herself, lots of people talked over one another when they had had drink and stop ruining the night. She seemed to get over it then and carried on as normal.
About an hour later, after copious drinking, Annie is slumped in a corner of the sofa and proclaims she feels very unwell. Announces she will have to sleep on the sofa because she feels too unwell to go home. I tentatively place a bin in front of her which she promptly throws up in.

At this point I'm already despairing at how the night has turned out. My idea of a girls night at my age is lots of fun chit chat with a few drinks. Not binge drinking yourself into oblivion.

Whilst Annie is vomiting and crying about her predicament, Sally goes missing for a while. She eventually turns up and very quietly states she has "been a little unwell". I am concerned and offer her to have some water but she says she is fine and starts downing a large gin and tonic. I think this is a bit weird if she has been sick so I assume she meant she had a bad tummy or something.

It gets late and I'm trying to usher everyone into going to bed as I know they have a 7am wake up, it's already 2am and I want them to sleep off their alcohol to be safe. So John and Sally head upstairs leaving Annie on the sofa passed out, they couldn't have given two hoots about her welfare. So I'm now trying to sober up Annie by sitting her on the doorstep to get some fresh air.

A very drunk Sally then returns to and from the kitchen with a bunch of alcohol bottles in her arms, spilling a lot of it on the floor I discovered later. While I ask her what she is doing aren't we going to bed? She says her and John will continue drinking in their room if I am going to bed. I'm too busy with Annie to care.

I then get Annie into the bathroom as she feels she might be sick again. This is when I discovered that yes, Sally was sick, all over my bathroom sink. She has BLOCKED the sick with chunks of vomit and the rest of the area is covered in puke (including my nice soap). At this point I become beyond livid. Not only had I scrubbed my house clean before receiving guests but she had not even bothered to tell me about the absolute state of my bathroom that I then had to clean by picking all the vomit chunks out the sink. The fact that she had also continued to drink and was STILL drinking disgusted me.

I promptly went upstairs and told John and Sally to stop drinking, that they had completely disrespected me and my home and where on earth did they think they were? This was supposed to be a girls night in not out clubbing or at a festival getting shit faced. Also they needed to drive at 7am so they were being completely irresponsible.

I finally managed to sober Annie up and get her in a taxi by 4 in the morning (with no concern from the other two) and I don't believe John and Sally went to bed at all before leaving at 7am so they may well be in a ditch somewhere from drink driving.

Aibu to feel really hurt by how these people have behaved? My house is my pride and joy and they have been so disrespectful of it, as well as the boundaries I had already specified. I never want them to stay in my house again.

OP posts:
Iamthewombat · 07/09/2019 22:59

I am visualising Kerry and Kurtan Mucklowe from This Country.

BirthdayDreamer · 07/09/2019 22:59

How well do you know these friends? Have you been out for drinks/had them round for drinks before? It sounds like you are very different from these 3 in terms of drinking behaviour/expectations of an evening etc.

Italiangreyhound · 07/09/2019 23:04

YADNBU, these people are horrible. I would find new friends.

Thanks
Skittlesandbeer · 07/09/2019 23:10

I’d likely have taken pics of them all, especially the state of the bathroom and sent them around the next day. Captioned ‘WTF happened to my fun night in with mates? Who’s coming back to clean up?’

Anyone who apologised and helped might stay on the friends list. Anyone else might find the pics on Facebook.

timshelthechoice · 07/09/2019 23:11

I'd have called the police on Sally and John because they could have killed someone, they were still well over the limit.

Bin the fucking lot of them, even Ann.

I'd have thrown them all out, tbh.

Turniptracker · 07/09/2019 23:12

I’d love to know why they were so keen to stay at your house instead of getting a taxi back that night. Are they both with other people and trying to use your house as a place to meet?

Yes I did wonder. I have them separate bedrooms but the other room hasn't been touched. Interestingly the duvet had been put back on the double bed upside down...
I'm planning on just burning the sheets

OP posts:
Cherrysoup · 07/09/2019 23:17

Fucking disgusting. I would have dragged Sally to the bathroom to clean up. To carry on drinking after puking is horrific. YANBU, they are all shitty.

justasking111 · 07/09/2019 23:18

Unbelievable at their age. At 17 DS had a party, one lad, puked in the sink, but worse he had opened a window and puked all over the patio furniture. I found it in the morning, he had left for his Saturday job. I phoned him and said get back here. Sulky reply I am working. Fine I said then I will phone your mother and she can come and clean it up.

He was there in 15 minutes Grin

Bin those so called mates OP they are not worth knowing.

chickenyhead · 07/09/2019 23:22

Oh god I hate having to be mummy to grown adults. If you can't handle it dont drink it, late 20s is old enough to know that

I would have kicked them all out at 4am. Sorry, I am mean.

CharlotteUnaNatalieThompson · 07/09/2019 23:23

Your friends are disgusting

However, with this comment you come across as a drama queen:

I'm planning on just burning the sheets

The duvet was put back the wrong way up, and your friends MIGHT have had sex (but probably just crashed given all the booze). FFS, just wash them

Pinkyyy · 07/09/2019 23:26

Absolutely disgusting behaviour. Have you actually told them all of this now that they are (maybe) sober? They owe you an apology, at least.

But, you need to learn from this. You didn't want them to stay so you should have asserted yourself. She puked all over your bathroom and you cleaned it up while she continued drinking, in YOUR house. I'm in no way excusing their behaviour as it was truly unacceptable, but a lot of it could have been avoided if you had not sat there and allowed it to happen.

BrightYellowDaffodil · 07/09/2019 23:26

Utterly disgraceful and disrespectful. I'm sorry OP, but they aren't friends.

ddl1 · 07/09/2019 23:27

YANBU! What nightmarish houseguests! And they are grown-ups - not teenagers who are celebrating having just reached the legal drinking age. All my commiserations, and no, don't have them to stay again.

criticaldarling · 07/09/2019 23:30

CharlotteUnaNatalieThompson Um yeah I'm guessing OP was being sarcastic there rather than actually intending to burn them Hmm

crazycatgal · 07/09/2019 23:32

I would've kicked them out and told them to sleep in the car.

Turniptracker · 07/09/2019 23:32

Haha I would never actually burn sheets, I paid good money for those!

OP posts:
Ayemama · 07/09/2019 23:33

God that's ridiculous. Definitely time to cut those idiots free

SolsticeBabyMaybe · 07/09/2019 23:41

Grim!

Rachelover40 · 07/09/2019 23:58

That is really horrible, Turniptracker. Grown up people behaving worse than teenagers.

I'm glad you're going to bin these 'friends'. At least Annie had the decency to apologise.

Honestly, who can we trust? Beggars belief.

Cakeorchocolate · 08/09/2019 00:15

YANBU. They behaved ridiculously.

I wouldn't have let them drive at 7am though in their state. For others safety. I would have called them a taxi and made them collect the key for their car later.

WhenPushComesToShove · 08/09/2019 00:25

CFs the lot of them. Oh well, the good news is you NEVER have to have them in your home again. Ghastly people by the sound of it

EmeraldShamrock · 08/09/2019 00:31

Yanbu. I would have made her scoop her own sick while I called the 3 of them taxis.
Never again.

bbcessex · 08/09/2019 00:34

Why did Sally say she and John were going to continue drinking in 'their' room if you have them separate ones?

What a night!

Ilovemypantry · 08/09/2019 00:38

John tried to cheer her up but Annie told her to leave her alone

So is John male or female? I’m confused....

Rachelover40 · 08/09/2019 02:23

Me too but I think John is male or female Wink.