Aibu to cancel charity direct debit?

[Almostalive]

I have sponsored a child through Plan International for over a year. We have written to each other and I have sent a birthday card at extra expense. A few days ago I received a letter informing me that the (auditors have been in) child in question has 2 sponsor's and I have been allocated a different child. Wtf? I am so annoyed. Should I cancel the cheque? (Direct debit).

The only person who will suffer is the child you’ve stopped paying for, so up to you. I wouldn’t be too bothered about a change of who my donation was supporting - it’s a charity arrangement, not a formal adoption process.

Well that's entirely your own decision. But what is your grievance? That you thought you were the 'only one'? If this child is in need of sponsoring then surely the more contribution would be better for the child in question? Or do you feel cheated on in some bizarre way.

If they've reneged on e.g. a policy of one child=one sponsor, then you might have a legitimate concern. Indeed if you feel that the funds are being misappropriated then cancel the direct debit. But if your only grievance is that you wanted to be this child's one and only saviour then you're misguided and should be rather happy that the child clearly is in receipt of a lot of support.

if you want to support the charity, just give them money regularly. the letters to/from the child are just an extra that don't make a difference to the work the charity does for the whole community.

Surely you did it to help a child?

Which will continue to happen?

Cancel it if you feel the need but at the end of the day it's the children that will suffer, not the auditor.

Does it matter? Really? Cancel it if you want to, charity donations are entirely voluntary so do what you like but child sponsorship is a bit of smoke and mirrors anyway - they money tends to fund a school or infrastructure really rather than an individual child - that's just to give you a personalised warm fussy glow.

Does it matter if another child benefits from now on instead of the one you originally sponsored?

Or indeed that the child you sponsored had, presumably due to some admin error or other, two sponsors for a few months? I strongly doubt that two charity sponsors meant this child was living it up on champagne and cigars and strutting around in a top hat like Uncle Pennybags from the Monopoly box, so you were still supporting a worthy cause.

They structure their donor model so that it feels more personal for the donors. Plan helps children and your money goes to help children. If someone cancels their donation do you think that child gets kicked out of school? If you no longer want to help Plan help children then cancel your DD. Maybe you'd rather receive a letter from a child via Actionaid or donate to a different charity that helps children or a different charity that helps donkeys or cancer sufferers, or maybe you'd prefer to keep the money. It's up to you.

I donate to Plan Int too, just to the general pot rather than sponsorship. I partly chose them because a friend who grew up in Sierra Leone said they were good, and judicious about the kids they chose to support. Up to you of course, but I wouldn’t this see this as a reason to cancel.

I may sound stupid and I understand that donations are split between a whole village etc. But, my 2 boys have known we sponsor this girl and Plan make it clear that you can visit your sponsored child etc. I just feel like the term and conditions have changed. If I sponsor the next chosen child what is to say it won't all change in a year or so? I'm feeling very torn at the moment.

Could you contact them to say how you feel? I’m sure they would rather give you assurances it wouldn’t happen again rather than you withdraw funding without explanation.
Apologies, I didn’t know they promoted it as such a personal One-to-One sponsorship with opportunities to visit. That does sound rather lax of them tbh.

You don’t own the child, do you realise that?

The thought of this child having to be paraded out in case their White Saviour decides to visit is disgusting.

Oh give over, Dyrne. You don’t even know if OP is white.

Plan makes it clear you can VISIT your sponsored child?! That's atrocious and yes in that case I'd certainly be cancelling any financial support and giving my money to a charity with more reputable working practises.

Oh god, you can visit? That's a bit much.

“White saviour” is a phrase, Saucery.

Do you honestly think it’s appropriate that this charity is pimping out children in poverty to secure donations? Is this child expected to be effusive with praise and shower their donor in thanks the entire time they’re there, rather than getting on with playing and school?

It will be an unfortunate error. Just over a year means you can't have sent him more than 2 cards (at your own expense? Good grief).

I can slightly understand why you're annoyed but equally as someone who has sponsored a child for nearly 10 years, I can tell you that the money doesn't go directly to the child. It supports the entire community.

It's a shame if you stop sponsoring. Plan do excellent work with women and girls.

Have checked the website as was totally shocked by this. OP, where are you getting the idea you could visit a child sponsored through Plan International? From what I can see of the information online, they are a very typical and responsible sponsoring operation and make no such claims.

It’s right there on the website:

plan-uk.org/sponsor-a-child/existing-sponsors/visit-your-sponsored-child

Like, I get being slightly miffed at the mix up and annoyed that your children have built up a relationship with one child only to be told that they’re never allowed to speak to them again.

But that’s not what the opening post was. It was annoyance that something they’d “bought” was being changed; and rather than looking forward to making the best of things and getting to know the new child; they were going to cancel their donation because they felt such a sense of ownership over the child.

It is more the effect it has had on my children (6yr old to be precise). I don't assume to be any kind of 'white saviour' ffs. It was the way it was sold and changed I have a problem with.

That is a new thing. Certainly wasn't the case when I first started sponsoring. Awful

That's really shocking that they offer that

OP if your children were suddenly desperately poor would you be happy for them to be pressured into sending photographs and charming letters and promises of visits with random rich strangers, just so they could get their basic needs met?

And yes you should cancel the dd.

You have a problem with the way it was "sold"?

They let you visit the child? That is awful! I have always thought these sponsorship things are a bit exploitative, I hate the way the kids have to make a performance of their gratitude, not to mention the way so many charities shoehorn religion into the programmes, but the idea that they will actually parade the poor kid in in front of their "generous benefactor" makes me feel sick.