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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Cleaner cancelled last minute due to childcare

488 replies

UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 16:05

I've found a fantastic cleaner, single mum by the sounds of it, brings her daughter with her (I don't mind), you can tell she is struggling financially and with her little one.

Today she cancelled on me 10 mins before the appt because of childcare. I understand that with a kid, things get a bit difficult with work but a heads up would have been nice!

Since my house has been a tip I've got to do it all by myself (pregnant + toddler, and dh works long hours)

AIBU to be upset?

OP posts:
NoSauce · 05/09/2019 20:24

There’s nothing wrong with having a cleaner 🙄 if the OP wants one she shouldn’t have to justify herself.

Original poster
UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 20:26

@myweechickens

Hope things get better, thank you for your genuine advice....Lost amongst the sea of trolls on this thread Hmm

OP posts:
Lweji · 05/09/2019 20:27

Hello everyone. My name is Lweji.
I have a cleaner and I like it.
Grin

Having said that, my husband and I did all the cleaning when I was pregnant.

Not sure what that makes me. Confused

Original poster
UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 20:28

@lweji

Yes it would have made a difference because I was waiting for her to come and didn't put my own child to sleep so I could let her in.

OP posts:
Original poster
UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 20:29

@lweji

It makes you like me, this is the third time I've ever called a cleaner to come.

OP posts:
NoSauce · 05/09/2019 20:29

I have a cleaner and I don’t work.

Kill me now.

Original poster
UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 20:30

@NoSauce

ikr?
People are so judgemental......

OP posts:
EmperorBallpitine · 05/09/2019 20:31

I like having a cleaner.
Mine occasionally cancels, one time she had a sickness bug. Her lack of English skills mean she's shy of ringing me or texting me, usually gets her daughter to do it! So the message can be a bit last minute. Its her who is really missing out, on the money, I don't feel annoyed, I just feel a bit bad for her. Not bad enough to pay her anyway, but..... I think you just have to expect it now and then.

NoSauce · 05/09/2019 20:32

Don’t worry about it OP.

Lweji · 05/09/2019 20:32

Did it make that much difference, though?
Couldn't the child have a slightly later nap? Or earlier?

I'd suspect the reason would not only have been her child falling asleep. But maybe she was embarassed to tell you.

Get annoyed if it becomes a habit. Be generous with a one off.
Do let her know you were inconvenienced so that she's not tempted to make a habit of it.

EmperorBallpitine · 05/09/2019 20:32

@nosauce me too (well I am a writer so literally no one believes my job is anything but an excuse)

Whitejasmine · 05/09/2019 20:33

Not sure if anyone has mentioned this yet but the answer is to get a cleaner through an agency. They will ensure you have someone to clean, maybe not the sams person every time but at least you're less likely to be completely let down.
You will pay more but will also have insurance against breakages etc.

Beaverdam · 05/09/2019 20:33

Why cant you clean yourself just this once? Being pregant with a toddler is no excuse. Her child must come first. I sort of understand where you're coming from though.

makingmammaries · 05/09/2019 20:35

Glad for you that you don’t have worse stuff to be upset about, OP.

myweechickens · 05/09/2019 20:36

@UmmUmar I apologise if I sounded judgmental in my first post, exhaustion means my brain doesn't always fire up properly.

These AIBU posts are a breeding ground for trolls and I've seen a few on yours. Maybe there shouldn't be an AIBU thread at all

Scentsandsensible · 05/09/2019 20:38

I have a cleaner. I also run a business, if I were to say “my employee hasn’t turned up as her child is ill- should I sack her” you’d rightfully al be up in arms.

Op just rearrange

NoSauce · 05/09/2019 20:39

Get this people - you can still have a shit load of worries AND have a cleaner!

MaybeitsMaybelline · 05/09/2019 20:39

YABU, you sound completely entitled saying you are pregnant with a toddler and a DH working long hours. FFS, not only did I have that but I worked full time on top, and dH worked away out of the country, not just long hours. Get a grip.

Original poster
UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 20:40

@lweji

Yes it did make a difference, he went to sleep before dinner and is now down for the night. Maybe the reason was different, and although 2/3 times she has come late I never mentioned anything because I didnt want to embarass her (even though I know people pay less due to lateness), I would want a little bit of a heads up. Even if she told me she's got period pains she cant come etc... I won't make an issue, just don't expect me to wait!

@Beaverdam

I can clean it myself - I am a normal person who cleans their own house! Yes her child comes first, if you read my post about my child delaying nap time, you can understand that I am a bit confused where that leaves my child.

OP posts:
Original poster
UmmUmar · 05/09/2019 20:41

@MaybeitsMaybelline

......And your Blue Peter badge is in the post

OP posts:
ethelfleda · 05/09/2019 20:42

Our cleaner quite often rearranges her days and occasionally doesn’t come if she has childcare issues etc. I don’t have a problem with it at all - it’s a fairly low paid job... IMO she at least deserves to have a little flexibility! And she is a good cleaner.

GCAcademic · 05/09/2019 20:43

Mumsnet isn’t just about parenting though is it. Lots of issues get covered here and lots of childfree people are members. Don’t be so narrow minded

But the strange thing is, Skittle, that you seem to hang out on the threads about parenting, apparently for the express purpose of telling everyone how glad you are that you don’t have kids. There are lots of us on here that are child-free, but we don’t feel the need to make a song and dance about it in virtually every single post. Either you’re a goady fucker or protesting far too much.

NoSauce · 05/09/2019 20:48

This thread has brought all the mummy martyrs out I see.

Lweji · 05/09/2019 20:49

I don't think you can make the comparison between the two children. Yours wouldn't have napped anyway if she went, or late.
Who chose the time for her to go to yours?
You could also cancel her at the last minute if you felt you had to. And, strictly, you wouldn't have to pay her (I would, though).
She lost income, so it can't have been too lightly and maybe she held it off until she decided it needed to be cancelled.

MrsNotNice · 05/09/2019 20:51

Op I don’t know why you are getting a hard time.

YANBU to be upset but if it’s the first time I’ll Let it go and excuse it, if this happens another time you need to ask her what was the childcare issue ? If it’s one where she could’ve given you a heads up then I wouldn’t tolerate

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