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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

CF childminder

97 replies

Poetryinaction · 05/09/2019 07:31

I can only find one person who will collect my ds from preschool. She looks after ds after preschool and his younger sister full time.
It's term time only as I am a teacher.
She keeps asking for paid holidays in term time, which is odd as she has school aged children. I guess she takes them away and pays any fine with the money we pay her. It's tricky as then I have no childcare. She often lets us doen when her kids are ill too.
She has recently asked us to pay for meals on top of her hourly rate.
Now she has told me she can't give my dc dinner one day a week as her dd has a swimming lesson.
I am annoyed as I thought she was paid to look after my dc, therefore not available for swimming lessons?
I have looked at alternative childcare but feel stuck now as my ds love preschool and it feeds into his school so I really need someone for that pick up.
I don't suppose I am looking for solutions, just to see if people agree she is a CF??

OP posts:
Biggie123 · 05/09/2019 07:34

Sounds very odd.
Is she registered as a childminder?
I use one and we have agreed holiday dates.

I don’t like the sound of her at all. She knows your in a corner and exploits it. Is there really no alternative? Are there no other childminders?

user1493413286 · 05/09/2019 07:35

I’ve been using a childminders for a while now and apart from the odd day (which I think was her birthday) she’s never taken time off in term time. The swimming lesson part is unfair though.
All of mine have charged for meals on top though so I think that’s quite normal and they don’t really have a choice when their DC are ill.

BlueRussiann · 05/09/2019 07:36

No she isn't. She's a childminder not a nanny which means she's self-employed and sets her own rates and T&Cs. Childminders offer a home from home experience and mindees usually fit into the families lives to come degree. If you're not happy with that, maybe a nanny would be better.

blackcat86 · 05/09/2019 07:37

Is she a self employed childminder or have you employed her as a nanny? If shes an SE childminder then she needs to be clear on her fees and what they cover, and no she doesn't get paid holiday. I'm afraid she needs to work around her other commitments or say that she can no longer care for your DC. She cant get paid and not do the work. Both mine and DHs mums were childminders so I had zero family holidays because that was peak time and my DPs needed to work. I would be sourcing other options.

MellowBird85 · 05/09/2019 07:37

Paid holidays? You’re not her employer, you’re her “customer” surely? I think it’s very bizarre and sounds like she’s trying it on. My childminder feeds the kids in her care at no extra cost unless parents bring their own food (which I will be doing as he’s still on toddler meals). Using swimming lesson as an excuse not to have your DC is poor form and unacceptable.

BlueRussiann · 05/09/2019 07:37

*Family's
*Some

Need to start proof reading!

PleasedToSeeYou · 05/09/2019 07:38

I agree with you. What does your contract say ?

kaytee87 · 05/09/2019 07:38

She's self employed so she doesn't get paid holidays. What does your contract say with regards to everything else?

Boom45 · 05/09/2019 07:39

She's running a business on her terms so I don't think you can say she's a CF - it's up to her, as a self employed woman, to set her own working hours and charges. Doesn't sound like it works well for you though, which is hard but it's not cheeky.

Boom45 · 05/09/2019 07:40

And charging a retainer when she or you are on holiday is pretty standard for child minders where I live.

Nanny0gg · 05/09/2019 07:41

You pay her if you go on holiday, not if she does!

Wildboar · 05/09/2019 07:41

She shouldn’t be taking paid holidays in term time Unless it’s in your contract. Childminders yen’s to charge lower and you pay for holidays or a higher rate and you don’t. Can you do a packed lunch for the swimming day? What does she do for her own kids?

Original poster
Poetryinaction · 05/09/2019 07:41

The Pacey contract says paid holidays to be agreed by both parties. She added in the meals after signing the contract.

OP posts:
Original poster
Poetryinaction · 05/09/2019 07:43

I already do packed lunch as I dodn't want to pay for all meals but they have dinner with her that day as I can't pick them up until 5pm. Thanks for all the opinions.

OP posts:
Tippety · 05/09/2019 07:44

The swimming is cheeky, it's not like she is looking after your children as a favour, you are paying her for a service and she keeps changing what that is. Asking for paid holidays in term time knowing that you'll have to find alternative childcare? That's also cheeky. To have time off, yes but not to ask for it paid. The food isn't overly unusual, but then it depends what you're paying an hour- if at first it was part of the price so you are paying more then no.

BlueRussiann · 05/09/2019 07:44

@Nanny0gg @wildboar

Says who? She's self-employed! She can charge what she wants and go on holiday when she wants as long as she's following her contract (that she makes). In a standard childminding contract, it doesn't specify that that holidays can't be taken during term time. Don't be ridiculous.

flumpybear · 05/09/2019 07:45

Perfect example of why to not use a child minder - personally I'd be using after school clubs and nursery - never had any issues in the last 11 years with two children

pooopypants · 05/09/2019 07:49

Do you have a contract with her?

MustardScreams · 05/09/2019 07:50

I agree with @flumpybear, this is what put me off childminders for dd.

Op are there any other childminders in your area? Or a nursery for your youngest and childminder for your DS? That all sounds like a bloody nightmare.

Biggie123 · 05/09/2019 07:50

My childminder takes 7 weeks holiday a year. We pay for 2 of those and the other 5 are unpaid.
It’s all clear in the contract.
She doesn’t have children so we don’t fit around her family life and I would not accept that. She has two staff and 8 children and they take them out every day to farms, parks etc. She sometimes has her niece there when there is a childcare issue but she plays with and around the children.

LisaSimpsonsbff · 05/09/2019 07:51

A lot of this is absolutely fine if it's in the contract (paid holidays, holidays when she chooses, charging for meals) but it should all be in a contract and you should have known about it before you signed that contract.

I suspect the term-time holidays is because she can make a lot more doing holiday care so doesn't want to miss out on that money. If that's her normal practice, though, then again she should have told you beforehand given you're term-time only. It should also be specified in the contact how many weeks holiday she'll take.

Original poster
Poetryinaction · 05/09/2019 07:51

My dc at preschool has some minor SEN and loves the preschool which feeds into our school so I really don't want to change. I also would prefer term time only as I want the school holidays with the kids.

OP posts:
EdtheBear · 05/09/2019 07:51

Op if your not happy with the service, take your business elsewhere.

I'd look for nursery and use after school care when it comes.

emerencemaybehopeful · 05/09/2019 07:53

You might need an after school nanny then?

itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted · 05/09/2019 07:53

I use Childminder's - the swimming is completely bizarre? How old is her child? If child is under a certain age then she would need to be in the pool with him/her so who is minding your child then???

The meals charge is fine if you are claiming 15/30 hours childcare as she's allowed to charge for extras on top of that

The holidays issue....It's cheeky but If your contract doesn't state what happens about holidays during term time despite her/you both knowing you only needed term time care then there isn't much you can do. Have you discussed it with her??