DD is in year 6 at prep, a quiet thoughtful child, who genuinely likes everyone in her class, and has always been friendly with everyone. Without going into too much detail, we discovered dd was being bullied by a group of 3 girls, and it had been going on for some time. What has particularly troubled us, is the devious, abusive way in which they treating her, and how submissive she appeared to have become, purely to please them and try and keep their ‘friendship’.
They have done and said so many things, it would take a few pages to list.. telling her to meet them in various places at break time, then going elsewhere, leaving her wandering the school searching for them alone. Demanding she shared break time snacks under the pretence of giving her some of theirs, then leaving her with nothing. Getting her to do their homework for them in prep, ‘because she is clever’, but then laughing and telling her she is so dumb, when she handed it back. On a week long school trip before the summer holidays, they shared a room, and decided dd was not allowed to use the bathroom until they had all finished, by which time of course, it was always too late. She came home not having washed once the entire week, and seemed reluctant to question this in any way, as being wrong. She became extremely defensive when their behaviour was questioned in any way, and in the end it all came to a head, when she became too humiliated to go to school, because they had been laughing at the clothes she wore, and had humiliated her when they pretended they had decided to wear a ‘theme’ for a class party, which of course wasn’t true. The school became involved, parents were called in, and we have spent the summer trying to build up her confidence. After such a long time of being emotionally abused by these girls, it almost seemed as if she had become completely submissive, not to mention terribly confused. She thought they were her friends, but they were nothing but bullies. We were very close to pulling her out, but the school reassured us they would deal with it all robustly, should anything ever happen again, and year 6 will give dd great opportunities to develop her confidence with things like leadership roles etc etc
Back to school this week, and the leadership roles were announced; Head girl and heads of house for all three girls. Extolling their virtues as good role models for the school, and inviting us all to congratulate them on their success. Nearly every girl was given some kind of role, but our daughter has been completely excluded. If it wasn’t for the events that have happened, it truly would not bother me one jot. But given everything that has happened, we just feel so angry and disappointed. AIBU?