To feel so sad for this middle child,

[RoryGlory]

Older and youngest have the same dad.

Middle has to watch both his siblings leave to go stay with their dad at the weekends.

Mother doesn’t even know who the middle child’s father is.

Why is there such a double standard regarding stepmothers and stepfathers on MN? I've read threads on here in which stepmothers are told they have no responsibility to look after their stepchild while their partner is at work - "not your child, not your problem". Yet a man is expected to treat their ex's child as their own (the OP never even says that this man ever lived with him/her!) purely because they're his own children's half-sibling?

I have three children, two different dads but different order. Eldest has different dad who left and had no contact but my DC knew who he was. Very blessed that my DH treated my DC as his own - it was my DC who asked if he could call DH dad and asked if he could used DH last name as he wanted to feel part of the family. This years before DH and I had DCs together! My DC did not want my and DH DC to even know they weren’t full siblings. Children want to belong altogether and feel the same as the rest of their family. It was quite obvious my DC was not my DH (by colouring) and in later years by size and as little DH and my dc were quite fair so also a difference. This made my DC very sad.

In this scenario, the middle child is missing out and you can be sure they feel it. Add to the mix the usual middle child issues, I feel really badly for this child in the long term.

Sorry for you ladies who have multiple dads but I’m telling you from experience, even where other dad takes on another child. Can you imagine what this child is feeling?