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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to say that summer hols are a driver of inequality

685 replies

Teaandcrisps · 01/09/2019 08:56

Myself and OH have had mixed personal fortune over the last 10 years - so from personal experience know the difference.

Summer holidays with no money is shit - especially when the weather is crap. If you can afford it however, it's great fun.

It's not just the obvious things - summer hols, trips, activities, camps, increase in food costs; it's also if you have the kind of job that can give you time off.

Given that food bank have launched the holiday hunger campaign, AIBU to say that summer holidays is an unequal construct and the 6-weeks off needs to go.

OP posts:
dastardlybugs · 01/09/2019 09:36

YABU. Instead of dragging everyone down, we should be looking at ways to pull less fortunate kids up. Be it by community led programs or the introduction of flexible working hours etc.

berlinbabylon · 01/09/2019 09:36

I agree OP and I also agree with the suggestion that the holiday be reduced to 4 weeks and weeks added to May and October half terms.

As for the social media ideal that all kids are doing something every day I don't think it's social media as such but this idea of the hallowed "family time". I am still not sure what that is, as I would have thought that most people spend most of their time off doing household chores, homework, hobbies etc. I have it in my head as picnicking at a National Trust property, which wouldn't be my scene anyway.

I HATE how some people would rather everyone went without and suffered in an equal way

it's not about suffering, it's about rejigging the school calendar to avoid a massively long break. I know other countries have longer holidays, it must be even more of PITA to fill the time and cover childcare unless you pack them off to camp, US style.

IamPickleRick · 01/09/2019 09:36

I do agree with you. As kids we were very poor, my dad had died of cancer, and we had to be sent to stay with various awful neighbours while mum was at work. Our well-being, educational or emotional needs were never once a consideration for anybody. Eventually by about 14, mum let me stay home myself and look after my brother.

Now that I’m older, have my own family, (this year especially as we had no holiday away) we do a lot of things but things that kept costs down. We have some great parks and museums for free because we live in London. I’ve also done bike rides, swimming, geocaching, baking, sky watching, bug clubs etc.

Now whilst they are all free or low cost, they just aren’t things that my mum would ever have thought to do. Easier to just put us in front of the telly. I think the only reason I am so invested in making happy memories is because I don’t really have any of my own and am desperate to break the cycle of deprivation. What I’m saying in a nutshell is that it’s not all about money, it’s about time and emotional investment in children. Which is also hard to do whilst in poverty. Sad

Waveysnail · 01/09/2019 09:38

Nope it's fine. My kids play out with friends. They play in each other houses. Have realistic expectations. Lunches are cheaper as I can bulk cook and no pack lunches.

berlinbabylon · 01/09/2019 09:38

I don't think Christmas is too long, but I can't see the point of all the time off in early January. It would be better to have the week before Christmas off, but when it's been debated on MN there is usually a 50 50 split of people who'd rather have the time off before and those who'd prefer it afterwards.

BlueBilledBeatboxingBird · 01/09/2019 09:38

I can only assume that the multiple posters advocating for another week in May don't have children in upper secondary yet. It is not an option.

Evilmorty · 01/09/2019 09:39

Christmas is not too long, we went back before advent had even finished last year!

museumum · 01/09/2019 09:39

My ds only really got four weeks of what we’d consider traditional summer holidays. The other three he was in full time holiday club as we had to work.
Also note that in the US where they have long summers they pretty much take summer camp to the extreme!
Hanging out with family for seven weeks isn’t very practical for most (though believe me if I could I’d have a Scandinavian summer cabin and bunk off work entirely)

BlueBilledBeatboxingBird · 01/09/2019 09:39

You went back on Christmas Eve, @evilmorty?!

Josephinebettany · 01/09/2019 09:40

Yabu. You know when you have children that they are your responsibility. You know that costs are going to increase. You know that if you work you are going to need child care. Yes when they are in school you need less child care which is great but this does not make child care the responsibility of the school. Children need holidays. They need more holidays than adults. They are children. They need freedom and they need to play. They need family time in order to grow into well rounded adults.

Original poster
Teaandcrisps · 01/09/2019 09:40

And so then problem is that the burden of summer hols is being carried by individual families. The hardest hit are children from less well off backgrounds who are bearing the brunt.

On the one hand, we would need to invest more (quite rightly) in teachers pay and conditions to make it work if school term time was increased. Or for more funding into good quality and free to all holiday care.

And no I dont believe that this could be solved if holidays were simply redistributed, this would not solve the problem or structural inequality at all.

And for all those folks that say we have the shortest holidays - this is irrelevant. The UK summer hols was set to coincide with the harvest so it's a construct that worked for the economy of families.

Summer holidays are a luxury for a modern economy and a burden for the less well off.

OP posts:
Youmadorwhat · 01/09/2019 09:41

I’m in Ireland (where the holidays are longer) most ppl tend to do a mix of holiday clubs/camps, annual leave, parental leave and relying on some family/friends for a week here and there. It can be done. I’m really starting to get the impression the ppl in the uk resent/hate taking leave for anything other than a week abroad! 🙄

fedup21 · 01/09/2019 09:42

Many school buildings are old and are simply falling down. As they are academies now, they are responsible for their own building and maintenance-which they often can’t afford to remedy but that’s a different thread.

Every school I’ve worked in has had building works, deep cleans and maintenance/repair going on for most of the 6 week holidays. They need that amount of time to get things done and fixed and it needs to be a big chunk of time when there are no children there as there are ladders/scaffolding all over the place.

EdtheBear · 01/09/2019 09:43

No children need time off, esp those who struggle in school.

Many workplace operate policys that only allow 1 in 3 or 4 staff off at a time. Which is usually a juggle and jostle for the school weeks. You make them shorter and bang goes the chance for parents to get time with children.

DippyAvocado · 01/09/2019 09:43

I think the answer is free/subsidised summer play schemes, not shorter summer holidays.

But that would mean the government funding something for children, which which obviously won't happen anytime soon.

Yep, this.

4 week holiday would be totally impractical for parents in most workplaces where leave has to be staggered. Also, holiday prices during the "peak" season would rise even more and would probably lead to an increase in people taking children out of school for term-time holidays.

YippieKayakOtherBuckets · 01/09/2019 09:44

The comparison to long continental summer holidays isn't helpful. There's a whole culture around these structures, particularly in the workplace. Whole businesses shut down for part or all of August and workers have no choice but to take their leave at this time. Compare this to the scramble in UK workplaces to book annual leave during the holidays while managers try to keep enough staff on to keep the business operating.

Evilmorty · 01/09/2019 09:44

Haha! Obviously I meant the 12 days of Christmas. We went back on the 2nd Jan.

HotChocWithCream · 01/09/2019 09:44

I completely disagree with the idea that if you don’t have money to throw around then your children are not able to gain skills and will suffer over the holidays.

There are loads of things you can do with children that cost no money and would “improve” them. How about:

  • visiting your local library
  • going to free museums / art galleries
  • nature walks (our local council offer free ones led by rangers)
  • helping out in your local community by doing volunteer work (litter picking, planting, helping out in care homes)
  • taking rescue dogs out for walks
  • create recycled arts and crafts
  • sort out your garden - build a bug hotel using found materials

Etc.

Youngandfree · 01/09/2019 09:45

I think the answer is free/subsidised summer play schemes, not shorter summer holidays

GOOD GOD!! The uk government barely provide what it is doing NOW! Never mind adding this!! Not everything can be free!! 🙄

DobbyTheHouseElk · 01/09/2019 09:46

We had 5 weeks off, 2 weeks in October. It’s difficult to juggle whenever the holiday comes.

fedup21 · 01/09/2019 09:46

we went back before advent had even finished last year!

What??

fedup21 · 01/09/2019 09:47

Haha! Obviously I meant the 12 days of Christmas. We went back on the 2nd Jan

Ahhh, that makes more sense!!

scaryteacher · 01/09/2019 09:47

Having an extra week in May will screw up exam revision, exam timetables, and exam marking.

I would have liked an extra week in October and at Christmas.

Belgian kids finished school at the end of June, and start again next week. They also have every Wednesday afternoon off. There seem to be lots of summer clubs here, but equally you pay for more in the school. The parents pay for all the exercise books and textbooks for the year.

IamPickleRick · 01/09/2019 09:48

HotChocWithCream but what working single mother has the time to do all of that? Her first consideration is feeding the children, keeping the home running, paying the bills. That’s why I say that poverty is all pervading. It saps your time as well.

LadyRannaldini · 01/09/2019 09:49

Surely we should be tackling the causes of inequality?

Maybe we can start with mismanagement of funds, in all income brackets! I've worked with relatively well-paid people who are always broke.
I love the way the school is looked upon as free childcare, missing in Summer.