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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be upset that this family took photos and filmed when I was obviously so upset and terrified...

97 replies

Sandingham · 26/08/2019 20:38

Today we took my children for a much promised trip to a go ape type course. When we got there they wouldn't let my husband, as planned go round with my children aged 6 and 8, due to footwear (my fault for not checking closely enough). Concerned about the 6yr old and not wanting them to miss out I went up instead though I am afraid of heights. Whilst the six year old was a bit nervous on the first few obstacles I was ok, scared but could pull it together for his sake. When he got confidence and shot off round course with big brother and I was left alone, I froze, totally and utterly. I was shaking so much I couldn't work my hands or feet properly, struggled to breathe etc. I was clearly terrified, more-so than I have ever been in my whole life. There was no way down, you have to complete the whole thing. Two lovely lads came up and helped me. It was slow, I was shaking and really trying to get round. This family watching from the park next to us started to take photos of me, film me and were obviously finding the whole thing hilarious. Whilst I can see a funny side the idea that there is a film now of me at my worst and so utterly terrified I could hardly move my feet is really bothering me this evening.... I did finally get round and complete the course but this filming thing and being used as a laughing stock has upset me a bit! I keeping being scared it'll appear all over social media!!

OP posts:
RosaWaiting · 26/08/2019 21:12

OP that’s awful

I had a similar experience in the olden dats before anyone could film this stuff. I really feel for you and I hope they get what they deserve.

Glad to hear it is illegal to film like this in some countries.

RosaWaiting · 26/08/2019 21:13

*dats? Grin

mommybear1 · 26/08/2019 21:13

Well done for helping your kids OP but bloody hell awful behaviour from this other family- so sorry you went through this but relish in the fact you did so well ThanksGinGinGinGin

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 26/08/2019 21:14

You're a bloody hero, OP!

Never mind if it appears on social media, you did an amazing thing! 👏

Gigia · 26/08/2019 21:17

Please be proud of yourself for going up there with your kids. I am not afraid of heights but had a panic attack on Go Ape and had to quit before the end. My ds and his friend were miles ahead so spared of the embarrassment. Some people behave awfully and that is on them, not you. I am sure it won't appear on sm but if it does please just contact the site and they will remove it instantly.

Holidaysmoliday · 26/08/2019 21:17

Was it definitely just you they were filming?
I’d have sent my husband who was on the ground to go and tell them to delete it.
Or gone and tried to find them myself after I was down

Horrible thing for them to do I’m so sorry OP
And you are very brave for completing the course. Utterly terrifying for anyone with a fear of heights.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 26/08/2019 21:17

So, you were utterly petrified but completed the course regardless?

Someone has a video of you being a total badass. Far from your lowest moment.

You faced your fear. Hold your fucking head up! You did good.

helpmeiamatoad · 26/08/2019 21:20

You shouldn’t have gone up if you’re so afraid of heights that you would be physically unable to move. How odd.

Scrumptiousbears · 26/08/2019 21:20

What with social media this has become the acceptable thing. Countless times I've objected to people taking photos or filming car accidents and putting it up on FB.

Whilst this is unacceptable we have all watched films taken of other people's misfortune be it on social media or in the press/news. We are all guilty of it.

MarshaBradyo · 26/08/2019 21:22

If you have to complete the circuit then I bet it’s happened before.

I’m ok with heights but would be the same with a small space - couldn’t do the Carsten Höller slide and some other claustrophobia-inducing thing at the Hayward Gallery when my dc did.

Anyway idiots for filming you - are you sure it was you not their dc btw?

Reprehensible if so. If someone had filmed me well..

CoolLikeOvie · 26/08/2019 21:26

I would give up my life for my DD in an instant, but I'm terrified of heights, and I'm 99% sure I wouldn't do go ape for her, just so she would have a good day (at a push, maybe in a weird sniper scenario, where they'd shoot if I didn't complete it, but luckily (for us both) we're unlikely to be put in that situation any time soon Grin).

What a mum you are, OP! And what terrible role models they are to their kids.

Fuck them. You've absolutely outparented, and outlifed them in every way today. 👏🏼

Magicpaintbrush · 26/08/2019 21:26

I went on a go-ape type circuit last week and ended up crying! It is really scary when you're actually up there. The people who filmed you and laughed are disgusting arseholes - I would have been fuming if that had happened to me. It's depressing that there are idiots like that out there - where was your DH, did he not see what they were doing and ask them to stop? Well done for getting round the course - people on the ground don't realise how difficult it is if they haven't done it.

Kittykat93 · 26/08/2019 21:27

You did brilliantly!!! Ignore those bellends.

MsJRMEsq · 26/08/2019 21:27

Well done, I couldn't have done what you did. As for the others, well they are complete tossers.

ymf117 · 26/08/2019 21:27

What pricks, even more so at ground level, bet they didn't go on. I would have felt the same - had I not previously shat myself on the way up. Well done for completing!

Weymo · 26/08/2019 21:32

They’ll probably post it on social media or YouTube. It’s just what people with that mentality are like.

You could probably track it down if they did. Tag the company GoApe in it and they might ask for it to be deleted, because it’s hardly a good advert for them.

We have a GoApe very near our town, there’s not many of them in the country.

Like another poster said, I’d just feel sympathy for you, and think the person who filmed it was a prize plank. Don’t worry. It’s the world we live in now isn’t it, you’re every move is tracked by cctv or some bonkers person with a video device.

DishingOutDone · 26/08/2019 21:33

Please report it to the venue just in case there is any come back; and they should have been enforcing the rules (or maybe making new ones Hmm)

Well done though Flowers !!

Sandingham · 26/08/2019 21:35

Thanks everyone. I thought I'd be more OK than I was. And it definitely was me they were filming. I was too shaken after to find them but wished I had if now. Thank you for the kind posts, makes me feel better regardless of that family.

OP posts:
Villageidiots · 26/08/2019 21:35

If it does appear anywhere it will only show them as bellends, not you. You've done nothing wrong. All you've done is support your family. I hate heights and couldn't have done what you did x

Sandingham · 26/08/2019 21:37

Dh couldn't see them. They were in an adjacent park bit and he was with children in the middle, all trying to cheer me on!!

OP posts:
Hello1231 · 26/08/2019 21:38

Sorry to hear that, people can be horrible and pathetic! I would have been exactly the same as you, and you should be really proud of yourself; I wouldn't go up there at all so even doing that let alone completing it is awesome.

Tarchie · 26/08/2019 21:38

💐 for you OP, what a horrible experience. Not only having to cope with the fear you had (understandably so given the height of GoApe) but then to have complete idiots film you. As other posters have said, you should be very proud of yourself for the courage you found and to just have utter contempt for people lacking any shred of decency. What is wrong with some people, they’re disgusting?

jacquesjacques · 26/08/2019 21:43

You poor thing, they sound absolutely vile.

I went with DH for his birthday once (my idea) and was nervous but really looking forward to it. I got up the first tree and my legs just buckled underneath me and I couldn't physically do it. I had to lie down on the little platform until I could bear to climb back down again. Felt an utter idiot but I couldn't help it. If somebody had filmed me I think I'd have lost my mind at them.

Am usually quite a no-nonsense, get on with it kind of person but my body and brain had other ideas! WineThanks

InsertFunnyUsername · 26/08/2019 21:43

YANBU OP. Horrible bastards.

Think of it like this... Would you laugh if your friend showed you a video they took of a woman, clearly scared and nervous the way you were today and they thought it was oh so funny? Because I wouldn't. I'd think they were wankers. That's the reception they'd get from most people if they shared it.

RLOU30 · 26/08/2019 21:44

You sound like a brilliant mum