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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be unsure about 3 weeks in rural Switzerland with a tiny baby?

80 replies

dalianialia · 21/08/2019 22:16

I am due to give birth in late October. PIL have just been in touch to say that their friend's who live in Switzerland are going away for 3 weeks starting in mid December and all the way through to the new year and they have offered PIL their house for that time for a very reasonable price. They want me and DH to come with baby (who will be around 6 weeks old by then, possibly younger if I go overdue) for the entire 3 weeks. DH really is keen to go but I just worry it will be very stressful. It's going to be freezing and the house is well up in the mountains, we will have use of the friend's car which they are going to leave at the airport for us but it's a rough and long drive to get to the shop (they are going to leave the kitcken stocked for us but obviously they don't have baby things, so if we run out of nappies etc or baby needs something we are screwed) or a town, so it's not a holiday where we'll be out during the day etc. We have to drive from the airport to the house which is supposed to be a good few hours. I am going to have a tiny baby and will already be bloody knackered. My hormones are likely going to be all over the place and I'm just concerned by it all.

I feel ungrateful to turn it down but I'm just not sure I'll be able to cope with it, and it's going to be so cold. I have considered just going for the last week but DH thinks if we're going for one week we might as well go for the 3. Do you think it's a good idea?

OP posts:

drivingtofrance · 21/08/2019 22:19

No. It's too soon imo.

Have a nice peaceful Christmas at home - just you DS and baby. Let PIL go to Switzerland.

TokyoSushi · 21/08/2019 22:20

It sounds lovely but I think you need to insist that if you go, it's just for a week.

epari · 21/08/2019 22:21

YANBU.

At 6 weeks, babies tend to go through massive growth spurts, will be feeding around the clock regardless of how you feed and your hormones will be crazy.

I think for the first few months (me I think for the first 6 months) a mother should be comfortable and at home with her baby.

You already don't feel like it and with a newborn? You will definitely not be feeling it, your husband is in for a wake up call, but let him go, because I guarantee you being at home alone with a baby will be SO MUCH easier than being in a freezing cold mountain hold up with people around you!

Xxxxx

mundaneflounder · 21/08/2019 22:21

Nope. I wouldn't go for any amount of time until the baby was much older.

You will want to be home. I assure you. Trips out for the day, yeah you will be up for these if baby is 6 weeks old. Maybe even a night or two away somewhere (staying with family or the like). But you will be tired and focussed fully on the baby. You'll be getting into the swing of being a mum.

You might have a difficult birth and still be recovering. Emotional recover and physical!

So I would definitely be saying no to this, even for a week!

Is this your first? If not and you have older children I'd consider suggesting DH takes the older child over for a week to spend some time with the GP's.

Otherwise, no. Stay home.

Ornery · 21/08/2019 22:22

If you have a c section you will only just be driving again. I have a friend whose baby had to be helicoptered out of a French mountain resort with pneumonia. And erm, embarrassingly, my own kid got double pneumonia in a ski resort at 10 weeks.
That said, depends where, and what really is around. It would be access to medical care I would be most concerned about. Babies can go downhill quite fast and it is VERY scary if it’s a long way to a hospital, it’s dark, and a blizzard is raging.
I don’t think I’d do it these days, but in all honesty I did plenty of sketchy travel with babies and they all survived...

KindergartenKop · 21/08/2019 22:22

Just say no.
Nobody is thinking straight and only you have considered the practicalities of shops, warmth etc. What if the baby/you need medical attention?

Original poster

dalianialia · 21/08/2019 22:25

@Ornery That's another worry I have. It will be freezing and I'd be worried constantly about baby getting pneumonia. And I also still be quite early PP. If one of us were to fall ill the hospital would be hours away in awful driving conditions.

OP posts:

FelixFelicis6 · 21/08/2019 22:29

Definitely don't do it. I wouldn't anyway, with the baby being so young, but especially not with freezing temperatures and in a remote location.

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 21/08/2019 22:29

I'd say no.

Most other holidays with a baby then yes, you can get some enjoyment out of it or they can.

But winter in Switzerland you might not even be able to go a walk - youcant push pram through snow and ice and wont want to use carrier incase you fall. You'll be stuck indoors with nothing to do and none of the masses of baby equipment that newborns need - no baby gym to pop them on for a few minutes or bouncy chair when they need a change of scene. Plus food etc in Switzerland is very expensive

A couple of friends took their baby and grandparents (as babysitters) skiing last year. They literally did nothing as was cold and snowy and everyone was worried about the baby. They said they should have left her at home.

On the other hand I've been a walking holiday in Switzerland with an 11 month old baby in the summer and it was amazing (baby liked being in the backpack though, not sure it would have been great otherwise)

I'd drive somewhere in the UK when the baby is that young so you can take everything with you.

itsabongthing · 21/08/2019 22:29

Not impossible but bit of a faff to get a passport for baby in time for one thing.

Passport aside - I definitely wouldn’t commit to this now. Could you say that you will see how you feel at the time? Should be ok to get a last minute flight if you’re flexible on dates.

Is the house in a village? We have spent a lot of time in the Swiss alps with a baby and it’s not always that cold early in winter, and although we are in a small village there is a decent shop there and a local doctor.
I think earliest I went was with an 8 week old but would not have gone if it had not been the best way to introduce baby to her paternal grandma who couldn’t easily travel.

I don’t really see the appeal though, if the weather is very wintry it’s going to be tricky even to get for a walk with baby.

Toothproblems · 21/08/2019 22:31

No I wouldn't. It's too cold for such a small baby. You might not be 100% you don't know how you will be with feeding, bleeding, emotions, tiredness and your DH too with these things.
Plus you might not get a passport for baby in time. You would need to register the birth quickly and apply for a passport

Charmlight · 21/08/2019 22:32

Wouldn’t entertain it. Tiny babies aren’t designed to travel in aeroplanes and have all the bodily stresses it induces. What if the baby was poorly? Insanity IMHO.
Not a bleedin’ chance you’d have got me there.

Noteventhebestdrummer · 21/08/2019 22:33

Just go! You have people to help you and you're not in the back of beyond.

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 21/08/2019 22:36

Also I had an episiotomy and still couldn't sit for any length of time apart from on a breastfeeding cushion at 6 weeks, was still bleeding etc, and having feeding issues (baby had an undiagnosed tongue tie so had it cut around 4 weeks and still needed help with feeding from a breastfeeding support group at 6 weeks. In fact this happened again with my second and is surprisingly common). I wouldn't have really liked being anywhere with my in laws, as nice as they are, when I was hobbling about with a pump attached to my boobs and sobbing I just wanted my mum and my house.

Not wanting to freak you out (and by 10 weeks pp I had cabin fever and was ready for a uk holiday which went really well) but you never know what its going to be like so planning anything that is going to cost any money or cause other people disappointment if you cancel in the first couple of months is chancing it. Also depending on when the baby arrives they usually have vaccinations at 8 weeks so these could be a few weeks late which I am not sure I'd want to chance with various outbreaks of diseases in the news

Greaterthanthesumoftheparts · 21/08/2019 22:37

I think some of these resources see are over-reactions. I love in Switzerland, all the roads will be cleared including (especially) mountain roads since the buses will need to get through. Even the smallest towns will have shops but presumably you’ll be breast feeding and will take nappies with you (or formula if not breast feeding). The hospitals here are far superior to the UK so medical wise you’ll be in a better place and your child is just as likely to catch pneumonia here as at home. We don’t have thousands of babies running around with pneumonia, bring blankets and appropriate clothing and they’ll be fine. I have a 15 month old. He has survived.

edwinbear · 21/08/2019 22:37

Absolutely not. Baby aside, potential CS recovery aside - I’d probably end up killing my PIL (who I’m very fond of) if we were couped up in an isolated house for 3 weeks over Christmas.

Have you seen The Shining?

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett · 21/08/2019 22:37

If you would have wanted to spend three weeks in rural Switzerland in winter, without being able to ski, with your PILs before then go. Little bit of planing, it will be fine.

If the thought makes you want to stick frozen jobbies in your eyes without adding a baby into the mix, don't.

If you're neutral without adding a baby into the mix, don't.

xyzandabc · 21/08/2019 22:39

I'm going to go against the grain here and say go. If your parents are the sort who will pitch in and help look after you/baby, it could be great. Will they cook, do laundry, hold baby so you can shower? If so then fab. If they are not so helpful and will expect you to wait on them hand and foot then no way.

Switzerland is a very modern developed country, even the rural bits. Have you been to this particular place before in winter and know how long it takes to drive about for definite, to shops, village, hospital? Because I do find it quite hard to believe that you would be hours away from a hospital. Swiss healthcare is excellent.

How high is the place you are going? Mid December is still early in the ski season and often some resorts still struggle for snow then. If you are lower down it is unlikely to be snowy and may not be even that cold. Also every Swiss home I have ever been is has been roasting hot even in deepest February as the houses are built to deal with the cold.

obviouslymarvellous · 21/08/2019 22:41

Switzerland is nothing like what a few Mumsnetters are portraying. It won't be that cold and believe me the roads will be free from snow! It's nothing like the UK in that respect. I would go if you have a straight forward delivery, a section will make it a bit more complicated. Switzerland is an amazing place and you wouldn't be on your own x

xyzandabc · 21/08/2019 22:42

Or what greaterthanthesumofoparts said!

AmIRightOrAMeringue · 21/08/2019 22:42

Small babies are fine on flights by the way, there is no reason they can't fly. People in Switzerland have babies! And it isn't too cold but you wont want to be outside much compared to here and might need different gear.

People saying what if you or baby got ill...there is a decent healthcare system in Switzerland. Youd have to check post partum complications were covered on your travel insurance. And I believe currently EHIC cards (or is it E111) are valid there (you would need to get the baby one separately but this is pretty quick to arrange, quicker than a passport if I remember). However not sure if that will be the case after Brexit or not...

So it is perfectly possible to go and wont be detrimental to you or the baby. I'm just not sure either of you would be comfortable or enjoy it!

Original poster

dalianialia · 21/08/2019 22:43

Thank you all for the input. I think I am going to tell DH that I will consider going for the last week if me and baby are up to it. But the rest is just too much.

OP posts:

Megan2018 · 21/08/2019 22:44

I can’t imagine wanting to spend that amount of time away from home or with other people with a new baby! The thing I am most looking forward to is hunkering down at home, shutting the world out and living in a lovely bubble for the first few months. We’ll have day visitors yes, but I want it to be largely just us.
There is no way on this earth I’d go away.

We usually host Christmas for the extended family but this year we have said no (we’ll have a 12 week-ish baby), as we want to be on our own, slobbing in PJ’s for once.

Onesailwait · 21/08/2019 22:45

I would go against the majority here. If you can get the passport sorted go for it. I ln my experience this was the easiest time to travel with my 3. Buy a carrier,.wrap.baby up warm & go for walks and long lunches or catch up on sleep & take advantage of having family around to help & take baby out . I live in Canada babies survive just fine in cold climates. I would grab the opportunity with both hands & enioy.

Lockshunkugel · 21/08/2019 22:45

I wouldn’t want a tiny baby in a car seat for hours while getting from the airport to the house. It isn’t good for newborns to be in a car seat for too long.

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