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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Huge spider in my room and I am terrified AF :(

82 replies

NoIinteam · 20/08/2019 22:50

This is so upsetting. I walked into my room and there was a huge spider on the floor. Tried facing fear and trapping it under a pint glass, but the glass didn't fit and touched one of its legs and it ran under my TV cabinet. DH is working nights and won't be home until dawn.

I'm now barricaded in my spare room with my dog and I'm absolutely terrified. I know I'm pathetic, but I have a serious spider phobia and thi one is so big. I feel icky and have a constant sensation of things crawling all over me. How do I get through the night? Sad

OP posts:
TheDarkPassenger · 20/08/2019 23:17

I feel you. There’s one in my shower. I’ve had to wash my hair in the bath Envy

Bellatrix14 · 20/08/2019 23:18

Please don’t kill it, especially if you are just as bothered by it dead as you are when it’s alive. I appreciate that it’s horrible (I can’t emphasise, I’m afraid) but it really can’t hurt you and it is a horrible thing to kill it just because you don’t like the thought of it. If your dog is anything like my dog it will kill it if it sees it (my German shepherd thinks that spiders are a nutritious snack), so that might take care of it for you Blush

They don’t like the smell of citrus or vinegar, could you use that to your advantage?

TheDarkPassenger · 20/08/2019 23:19

Partner also on nights. Kids useless as I’ve conditioned them to also be frightened (fail!) except the biggest one who happens to be staying out this evening and the dog is fucking useless unless it’s a pheasant so I just silently fumed in the bath

NoIinteam · 20/08/2019 23:24

Dog unfortunately is slow and useless. He sniffed it for a brief second. Just staying in this room for now, hopefully it'll be there tomorrow morning for DH to get it.

OP posts:
nocoolnamesleft · 20/08/2019 23:26

I slept in the spare room due to a spider the size of a ROUS. Now there's a similar size fucker in the living room. Just hoping it's the same monster. Because if there are two of them, I burning the house down.

Notwiththeseknees · 20/08/2019 23:28

"Spiders are safe" repeat. The mantra I was given under hypnosis. Repeat, repeat. I feel for you Thanks

SlimGin · 20/08/2019 23:30

Ah I can completely sympathise with you OP. Also weirdly a lot of posters on MN can't fathom arachnophobia at all but are much more understanding of other phobias (eg emetophobia - there are dozens of supportive threads on it).
You're safe in the spare room, can you watch a funny box set or a programme that will help you sleep? Then set DP on it when he gets in. Also, well done on trying the glass trick! I've never been brave enough

Aph413 · 20/08/2019 23:32

I'm currently on the sofa because of a spider OP. And we actually caught it and got rid Sad, just can't get past seeing it there. So I completely get it, just settle into the spare room for the night and you'll be fine in the morning.
I feel miles better not being in the room where it was as silly as that is.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 20/08/2019 23:46

There’s nothing pathetic about a phobia. Of course it’ll do you no harm but. Fear and rationality don’t go hand in hand, do they.
Also it doesn’t matter how big it is. To an arachnophobic I’m sure a tiny spider is every bit as terrifying as a huge one.
It doesn’t help tonight, but Have you tried the Friendly spider programme at London Zoo. I believe it works wonders for people.

Sorry about my username, btw. and Don’t worry I’m not going to show you any baby Spiders. I promiseGrin

nocoolnamesleft · 21/08/2019 00:00

I can use the glass trick for smaller spiders (after years of psyching myself up - I live alone) but cannot do it with a glass. Has to be a cup, so I can't see the evil bastard in there.

Greeborising · 21/08/2019 00:13

I’m so sorry you’re frightened and suffering.
Tbf most spiders are totally harmless. The old glass trick is good.
Op, snuggle and go to sleep. It’s not going to get you in the night

ReeReeR · 21/08/2019 00:18

Did you sleep ok OP?

poolblack · 21/08/2019 00:27

I hate when people come on these threads with literally no understanding of a phobia.

I couldn't get close enough to put a glass over a spider, never mind carry one outside in said glass. I can't hit them, I can't hoover them, I can't use a spider catcher.

We had a huge one in the living room earlier that left me literally hyperventilating and screaming and that was after my hero DH has captured it. I am terrified. I'm embarrassed about it because I know it's irrational, but the dismissive comments that litter threads really don't help. Just because people don't mind something, doesn't mean everyone else has to be ok with it.

TheClaws · 21/08/2019 01:35

Do you live in Australia? No? Then you’re good. Even in Australia, the big ones that hang around on walls are friendly but just look horrendous. They keep the insect population down so they even have a job! A friend of mine lets her spiders stick around and even gives them names. I went to the loo at her house to be confronted with a massive Hunstman spider looming in the top corner - she said, “Don’t worry, that’s just Barry!”

Bravelurker · 21/08/2019 01:53

Omfg at the logical posters telling you things that you have known since you were 3 years old. We know they can't hurt you, we also know that we can probably access help but some of us are even too scared to do that.
I have held my DB's tarantula in my hand but Tyra is a loved (not by me) family pet. It didn't help. My DB also shits himself when he sees a house spider. It's nuts, I know but most phobias are.

Kinsters · 21/08/2019 01:53

OP I can really recommend the friendly spider program at London zoo, it honestly changed my life. I was so terrified of spiders before I did the course that I literally couldn't go near them. After the course I could catch them in a glass and put them outside (far, far away).

I still don't like spiders but I can deal with them.

OneStepSideways · 21/08/2019 06:07

I let the big ones stay, they keep the flies/wasps/moths/woodlice away! If it was huge it was probably a giant house spider, they're shy and calm, but this time of year the males leave the web to look for females, they go a bit ditzy and forget to hide when you put the light on. It's probably been living under your bed all year you just haven't seen it before. I usually nudge them back under the bed/wardrobe. I've never had one crawl on me in the night, they're cautious of being squashed! The only ones I relocate (to the shed) are the female false widows, as they can nip (although no worse than a wasp sting unless you're allergic!)

OnlineAlienator · 21/08/2019 06:17

Fuck me you were a hero to attempt the glass thing!

WE KNOW they are harmless, thats not what a phobia's about!

For me, it would be the spiders room now.

flowerycurtain · 21/08/2019 06:26

Buy some indorex.

When I'm faced with the same situation I would have sprayed around the cabinet

Surfskatefamily · 21/08/2019 06:33

Iv got a big one under my chest of drawers which I'm not keen on. Haven't been able to catch it!
Found of amazon some spider paper which catches them like fly paper. Maybe get that

Kinsters · 21/08/2019 06:34

OneStepSideways you (and many other posters on this thread) have zero understanding of a phobia. If you've got a phobia your body and mind reacts irrationally to the spider as if there's something dangerous in the room (a lion for example). Leaving it isn't an option.

I'm a lot better with spiders than I was and can stay calm enough to not panic and just remove them from the house or kill them if that's not possible. No way could I ever leave one in the house - I'd have to be actively working on managing my panic the whole time which isn't a realistic way to live.

Ninabean17 · 21/08/2019 07:10

I hope you managed to get some sleep op. I saw one on my sofa last night, roughly the size of my hand. Havnt been able to go in the lounge yet because my dh couldn't catch it. It really does debilitate you.

Cassilis · 21/08/2019 07:33

Does Vacuuming Kill Spiders? ... If being sucked through the hose doesn't do the job then the dirt and dust in the vacuum bag will finish off the little creatures via suffocation.

I also had a small rodent sized spider in my house, amid much trembling and inadvertent squeals I took it outside using a box and magazine. My heart was beating fast for ages afterwards. I wish it well in its travels and I hope it doesn’t die. Unfortunately I could only take it one foot outside my front door so it’s probably strolled back in.

WARNING PICTURE OF SPIDER

poolblack · 21/08/2019 08:48

Do you live in Australia? No? Then you’re good.

Yeah, that's not how phobias work Hmm

Ellabella989 · 21/08/2019 08:55

I totally sympathise as I have a very extreme spider phobia. My DP loves them but no matter how many times he tells me they are harmless and more scared of me than I am of them etc, I’m still utterly terrified as that’s how phobias work - they are irrational.
I have a big plastic mixing bowl downstairs and upstairs which I use to put over a spider if I see one and DP isn’t around. I couldn’t use a pint glass as it would involve my hand getting too close to it. My DP then deals with it and gets it outside when he’s home. When I lived on my own I used to have to keep the spiders under the bowl for a couple of days until I could get someone to come over and help.