I’m currently pregnant with number 2. My first born had good development inside the womb but his development struggled between 32 weeks-36 weeks. Was referred to consultants but cause never found. Was born at the second percentile. I had attended constant hospital appointments because my weight wasn’t increasing and alarmed doctors of my concerns about baby growth but they were complacent. I had never taken it lightly but I was assured that prenatal vitamins were enough and I took their advice st face value.
Ever since I’ve been religiously going to the health visitor. Received help from lactation consultant on my insistence. Stayed at home as a SAHM so I give him the best food.. I’m just so paranoid and blamed myself and cried for ages because I felt it was me who didn’t get Well nourished in pregnancy even though I was healthy but struggled with nausea (had severe nausea).
My parents know this. I take him monthly to the health visitors and they’re happy with his progress as he is still on the curve.
Now I’m 32 weeks pregnant, I’m feeling nervous and told my father (who is a biology teacher) to please wish me luck that this time round my baby doesn’t stop growing in the womb like the previous one. I asked him for advice on what I can do to make sure this doesn’t happen (in the womb).
So my dad went on to say that my baby’s weight is to do with my breastfeeding, food and sleeping. And that if I look after these there shouldn’t be a problem..
I don’t get on with my dads wife, she has been constantly putting down my breastfeeding when I visit. When baby cries at night she says to my dad that I’m not producing enough milk. My dad is a biology teacher but has no clue about those issues and his wife is uneducated. She has not been able to breastfeed her kids and I feel she is purposely obsessed with trying to make it out that I am not doing s good job.
So I feel upset at my dad. We had this conversation many times before. He seems fixated on the idea that I’m not a responsible parent despite the fact I keep telling him I’m going to health visitors and my child is on the curve and they’re happy with his progress and it’s just that he started of small.
I just replied that I’m confident with me looking after my child who is now a 2 years old and is perfectly healthy but that he will remain below the average weight and that it is not within my control.
I already struggle to accept that I had a baby inside me who was malnourished and I couldn’t do something about it and I feel sensitive that my father’s only form of support is to make me feel like I’m not doing enough as a mother.
AIBU?