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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Neighbour Dispute

149 replies

QualCheckBot · 14/08/2019 19:03

Not really a dispute, its all relatively civilised...

We are 3 households sharing a driveway. The driveway urgently needs repairs in order to keep it usable. The title deeds have it as being 50% responsible for upkeep for Household A and 25% each for households B (mine) and C.

However, A proposes that we pay a third each and DH and I are agreeable to that. C however lives alone and wants to pay only 1/5 of the total because there is only one of her and each other household has 2 people. She also says that as she doesn't have a car, she isn't contributing to the wear and tear. The driveway is the only way in and out of all the properties.

I am against this because I think it sets a dangerous precedent of her paying less than her share for future maintenance.

Furthermore, to avoid drip feed, C quite often has her parents staying with her so there are often 3 people there, and her parents have a car.

Neighbour A is wishy-washy and seems likely to let her away with it unless we put a stop to it. In fact, A's wife seemed to side with C because she doesn't like me for reasons unspecified but probably to do with the fact that I work and she doesn't, so I don't tend to fall for nonsense.

Is neighbour C being unreasonable?

OP posts:

newstart1337 · 14/08/2019 19:34

You are mad setting up a president that changes the deeds. You have no idea in the future how this will affect things, how much it will cost you (it might only be £500 this time but the next and the next?).

When you try to sell the house you might have to declare that a new owners will have to pay more than is in the deeds and as such the value of your house could be less.

You could be avoiding an argument no only to set up many more to come.

Jazzybeats · 14/08/2019 19:34

Yabu to do anything apart from stick to the deeds.

GoFiguire · 14/08/2019 19:35

I think you shouldn’t pay anything at all as you go out to work and therefore don’t use it as much.

Idontwanttotalk · 14/08/2019 19:35

YABU if you do anything other than go by the split per the deeds.

Household A are the CFs here. If you go for any other option than what is stated in the deeds then you are the one that loses out.

The deeds will obviously have been drawn up based on an equitable way of splitting the cost.

Ginger1982 · 14/08/2019 19:36

Why should C pay more than what the deeds say? Maybe she can't afford £2k. Sounds like A is just trying to get out of paying what was previously legally agreed.

FadedRed · 14/08/2019 19:36

I agree with the pp’s. Stick with what the deeds say, and don’t set a precedence for the future.

TheZeppo · 14/08/2019 19:36

Stick to the deeds. I don’t think she gets to pay 1/5, but it seeks cheeky to push her into paying 33%! She clearly is against that (and I don’t blame her).

Agree with PP- deeds are there to protect people legally.

marvellousnightforamooncup · 14/08/2019 19:36

If she's not happy with the deeds she needs to move or pay for huge legal arse ache.

Wiltshirelass2019 · 14/08/2019 19:38

Pay the percentage that the deeds state.

BarrenFieldofFucks · 14/08/2019 19:39

Stick to the deeds.

Not sure why your working means that you don't take nonsense however.

BarrenFieldofFucks · 14/08/2019 19:40

C may be taking the p asking to pay less, but so is suggesting that she should pay more than the deeds state.

MamaOomMowWow · 14/08/2019 19:41

I actually think A is being the CF here. They are obliged to pay 50% according to the deeds. They are trying to get C to pay more than they should, so it's not unreasonable for C to say that if you're throwing out what's in the deeds than a fifth is much fairer than a third.

Just stick to the deeds.

CloserIAm2Fine · 14/08/2019 19:43

Just go with the deeds and pay 25%

A is a CF for trying to make the others pay more and C is a CF for trying to pay less than they should

Redcherries · 14/08/2019 19:45

Stick to the deeds or you may have issues in the future. Deeds don’t take into account how many people live in a property, if 10 people lived in property A their share would still be the same cut. We have three sharing a drive, each with equal responsibilities to the drive, 2 in one house, 3 in the next and 4 in ours. We still split as per deeds.

Regards A’s wife, whether she likes you or dislikes you for whatever reason you implied as a working person you don’t fall for nonsense, equally implying stay at home partners would. You also refer to her as A’s wife, reducing her involvement in a situation she has as much say as you do in to merely the wife of someone. It stands out in your op and I do wonder what her side of the dislike story would be.

RosaWaiting · 14/08/2019 19:46

it goes with the deeds. That's all.

CCC1 · 14/08/2019 19:47

Do they understand that in Cs scenario. A will be saving £600, C will be saving £300, while you’ll be forking out an extra £900?

Pileofcleantowels · 14/08/2019 19:47

Is "stick to the deeds" going to become the new "cancel the cheque"?

HeadintheiClouds · 14/08/2019 19:49

Stick to the deeds. A doesn’t even like you! If she wants to side with C let her take the hit for any discount C is getting. Why would you get in the middle of that??

sadeyedladyofthelowlandsea · 14/08/2019 19:49

Sorry OP, I was being slightly flippant/a tosser

We were in an almost identical situation a few years back (3 neighbours, various shared areas, including drive and car park, etc.) Got on very well with one set of neighbours, the other... slightly more tricky. Our deeds were different in that they set out who was responsible for each area, rather than sharing all costs. So we were responsible for the drive, Neighbour B for the car park, Neighbour C for the front turning area.
Neighbour C were shite at sticking to their side of things. So Neighbours B & I used to pool our cash to cover all three sides that needed doing.
We celebrated massively when Nieghbour C moved out, and when the new people moved in, we had a very naice wine & nibbles evening, and agreed to get the deeds changed so it was 1/3 each for everything, rather than relying on goodwill.

Like most PP I'd say stick to the deeds - because if one neighbour sells up, you don't know what they might tell potential buyers 'oh, it's on the deeds, but we've come to an arrangement between us about paying for that'

longwayoff · 14/08/2019 19:53

Good luck. Unadopted road, ten houses, been arguing, gently, for about 15 years over who has more cars, who's had builders lorries in, who hasn't got a car etc reckon it won't be resolved until a delivery driver breaks an axle in one of the growing potholes and sues them all.

Pollypenguin01 · 14/08/2019 19:55

If you think you might ever want to sell your house then FGS stock to what the deeds say.

Original poster

QualCheckBot · 14/08/2019 19:56

Redcherries Regards A’s wife, whether she likes you or dislikes you for whatever reason you implied as a working person you don’t fall for nonsense, equally implying stay at home partners would. You also refer to her as A’s wife, reducing her involvement in a situation she has as much say as you do in to merely the wife of someone. It stands out in your op and I do wonder what her side of the dislike story would be.

I don't know, she just isn't very friendly whenever I've tried to engage with her. Will only respond to emails from DH and not from me, so I have to email her husband to pass messages on (I've arranged all the quotes except one). She does nothing to assist (in getting the quotes), neither does C, and doesn't own the house. Hence, yes, I have been referring to her as A's wife, because I have the very distinct impression that the pair of them look down on us. They seem unaware that most people have jobs Monday-Friday, and have often suggested meetings during those times.

Anyway, I don't particularly like her because of that.

OP posts:

Boysey45 · 14/08/2019 19:58

C is a cheeky grasping cow.
I'd say stick with the deeds and if she wont pay her fair share then I'd just let it get like a farmers field before I paid extra. I'd get the deeds printed off and explain to her it wasn't open to negotiation.

Original poster

QualCheckBot · 14/08/2019 20:00

longwayoff Good luck. Unadopted road, ten houses, been arguing, gently, for about 15 years over who has more cars, who's had builders lorries in, who hasn't got a car etc reckon it won't be resolved until a delivery driver breaks an axle in one of the growing potholes and sues them all.

Yes, I doubt it will be as simple as "sticking to the deeds" because A has not revealed what their deeds say. I'd rather avoid a full blown neighbour dispute by getting the driveway repaired before I can't get down it any more! Theres also a bit at the end of the drive which appears to be ownerless, which connects it with the public road. So I appreciate A are being CFs as well as C but at least this way it gets resolved quickly and amicably. I also think 1/3 is a reasonable enough solution should it be necessary to change title deeds to refer to that in the future - at least its fairly certain.

OP posts:

SorryDidISayThatOutLoud · 14/08/2019 20:00

For goodness sake, stick to what's stated in the deeds. All parties knew the score when they bought the properties.

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