To stop my daughter (what I see as) overeating?

[isthisfairidontknow]

She's 7, fit and healthy but neither skinny nor fat. Does gym, dance, etc each week.

But she has an enormous appetite. And we keep clashing over it.

For example this morning she has cried that she is hungry but has had a bowl of rice crispies, a banana and a cheese sandwich. She's only been up since 7. I've made her have a big drink in case she is thirsty. I would be full if I had that.

Yesterday she had a bowl of bran flakes, strawberries, breadsticks and Nutella (as a snack) mid morning, kids portion of fish chips and peas (at a restaurant) and apple crumble and custard for lunch then 'green pasta' for tea (peas, pesto, courgette, garlic, onions) and a corner yoghurt for pudding.

There is a rule in our house that food is unlimited but if it's outside of mealtimes it's fruit veg and water or milk. And I've offered all of that but she's still whinging on.

She's been like this every day of the holidays and it's relentless every day. Even before the holidays she was always complaining about portion size, 'can I have more? I'm hungry etc'

Is she just chancing it for more food? Because she doesn't want the fruit and veg and water on offer.

I agree about all the fretting- all my Dd's friends are thin and not by 2019 standards, by olden day standards. I know her friend's mums well and they all have a mixture of boring easy meals in the week- pizza, pasta, jacket potato and eggs on toast. It's all the bane of our lives, 'what to feed the children' as it's quite boring night after night.

I was similar at her age and so were my brother and sister. Grandparents didn’t battle with us but outside of meal times (and the meals my Gran prepared were huge!) after we reached age 6 we were told to prep our own bits in between, such as sandwiches, beans on toast, soups and so on. We were all string beans with ravenous appetites but a good metabolism to match.

As we are now adults I’ve noticed my brother and sister kept that metabolism and I sadly did not, so I amended my eating patterns and whilst I’m a bit chunky as an adult I’m in healthy BMI range and very active. I knew a girl who’s parents were very strict with food, far more so than OP, they were both overweight so constantly dieting and expected their DD to eat the same low calorie meals and would get very angry if she asked for anything else, she wasn’t overweight (similar slim build to me) and went through a phase after moving out at 18 over completely over indulging in all the food she felt she had missed out on. In two years she went from size 9 to size 16 and hated herself for it. Thankfully she sought counselling as well as dieting advice from her GP and is now down to a size 10. I’m not saying a size 16 is awful before anybody has a go for shaming, but it was for her because she had such low self esteem already.

So at age 7, providing you know your child isn’t overweight, I’d offer a bit more food with a good balance of fat and protein to help fill her up for longer. My Gran got around our constant hunger by making big batches of home made beef stew/chicken soups with loads of added veggies and such. We could help ourselves when we wanted and she knew it was better than snacking on empty calories 😊

My DD and DS are only toddlers but I’m convinced (especially with DS’s appetite) that I’ll be employing the same method :’)

All of my children would want multiply bowls of cereal for breakfast from my 3 year old to my 10 year old. They would also be able to demolish all that easily and want more, and all are slim. Can you put a big bowl of pasta on the table for her to snack on as she’s hungry? Swap the fruit up so she doesn’t get bored? For example I always buy apples and carrots for snacks but they get bored and so I buy grapes, strawberries, peppers sometimes. They also eat cream crackers a lot as cheap and filling x

Fill you up meaning satisfaction. So why are some people keen on giving limitless fruit when it doesn’t satisfy hunger?
Feeling satisfied by food is also to do with the interaction between that food and the hormones within the endocrine system and not simply a physical state of having a full stomach

Agree about lack of protein!

Does she like eggs? Scrambled egg on toast or boiled eggs for breakfast will fill her up much better than rice crispies. Spanish omelettes with lots of vegetables in, ham or chicken in sandwiches for lunch. Or mashed up tuna on toast.

“Fill you up meaning satisfaction. So why are some people keen on giving limitless fruit when it doesn’t satisfy hunger?”

Because they believe the child is full and doesn’t need anymore food I guess? That’s precisely why fruit is good for those situations.

Why are you obsessing over what she eats if she’s not overweight? It’s like you’re looking for issues

I ate loads as a kid, and I was a skinny rake. Maybe she’s just like me and has a fast metabolism? Even in to my twenties I could still put food away, sadly now I have to actually watch what I eat in my thirties. Not keen on policing a child’s appetite to be fair, especially not a girl with all attendant body issues/ disordered eating that stalks us. Remove the unhealthy options you don’t want and let her eat. I used to love oatcakes with butter and honey and I needed to have them when reading my favourite books...

...why are PPs saying htere "isn't any/enough protein"

the girl had protein from:

Breakfast: milk (in cereal)
Lunch: fish, peas and custard (milk)
dinner: peas, pesto (cheese/nuts), yogurt

...and about 10% of bran flakes are protein

But if they think the child is full then tell them to wait for dinner etc. Yes I know in the real world this is hard and no doubt most of us give in at times but sometimes we should at least try to encourage discipline. There’s nothing wrong with being hungry and it will not kill the child (altho the whinging may kill the parent which is probably the point)

I thought the point of eating was to satisfy hunger - food shouldn’t be used to satisfy other emotions. Obviously I know it is and that most of us use it like that but the whole point is to try to stop our kids going down the mindless snacking road and ending up fat, like the majority of people are these days (70-odd % of adults overweight it is now I think)

My kids eat nothing but protein and they still want to eat constantly.

Today 4yo has had a bowl of porridge made with milk, soft cheese, carrot and breadstick, a tuna and cucumber sandwich, strawberries and full fat Greek yoghurt, a slice of homemade banana loaf, another piece of cheese, will have chicken curry for dinner.

It doesn't matter how many eggs, fish, meat I give them they want more food.

I think it's boredom eating.

I think it's boredom eating

Oh definitely. I was mulling over this just now..what has changed. It wasn’t like this in the 80s. Were we less bored, outside playing more or fewer exciting snacks (only really remember a crisp or a biscuit as a snack and my mum was quite strict so you’d only get one or two biscuits)

I used to boredom eat. I look back in sort of horrified fascination now, because you’re right children weren’t fed as much so I would just eat anything that wouldn’t be missed- raw spaghetti, spoons of granulated sugar, cocoa powder

Weird thing is I was awfully, horribly skinny and hated it because I was teased so much

Protein is not just a fad. People are just so bad at judging a balanced diet. There’s 38% protein in an egg, 31% in peas, 23% in cheese. Most of the things people think of as “full of protein” are full of other things and some protein, usually less than a third.

What I’d recommend to feel full is lots of roughage. Protein too (as much as possible) but basically start really increasing the base amount of green leafy vegetables with meals. Doing bangers and mash, add a big pile of cabbage. Making a stir fry, double the amount of veg you’d usually add. Try substitutions like courgetti for spaghetti.And put more beans and pulses in food generally.

Also ditch cereal when possible. It really isn’t great for a healthy diet. It’s just carbs and calories and a sprinkle of useful nutrients. Also everyone eats 2 to 4 times they should. Save it as a treat if you like it but don’t just shovel it in because culturally you’re used to thinking breakfast is cereal.

Most of those are not foods I would find particularly satisfying, nor does it sound like an excessive amount of food.

Its like me right now. I'm not really hungry, I've had an adequate breakfast and lunch, but there are nice snacks in the kitchen and I could easily demolish a load of junk food.

If I was a child I'd probably be moaning right now saying I'm starving.

My toddler eats constantly.

Today we’ve had: porridge, yogurt, cheese, peppers and hummus.

Dinner will be one of those Mexican burrito kits with Quorn, vegetables and cheese.

Tomorrow we are going to McDonalds for a happy meal - GASP!

Most British people get more than enough protein- often many times the RDA each day.

I had a salad for lunch. Mozerella, tomato, avocado, cucumber and pesto dressing (pesto and olive oil) I am fucking starving. Con.

She sounds dead greedy TBQHWY. Just tell her "No" and re state the rules.

It's not exactly the most nutritious range of food is it? No wonder she's hungry. Cut out Nutella and some carbs and ensure she eats more veg and the fruit. Corner yoghurts have more sugar in too. Sweet, fatty foods and carbs increase cravings so you need to shift the balance.

Well this sounds like a recipe for making sure your DD has a terrible relationship with food in the future.

She needs to learn how to regulate her own food intake. She needs to keep tuned into her internal hunger/satiation state. You are taking all that away from her and replacing it with rules.

If I could sue my parents for doing the same to me and leaving me with a life time of food issues, I would.

Rice crispies don’t fill anyone- full of air. Try porridge or eggs with toast.
I think your approach sounds good about limiting snacks to fruit. Boredom is a major factor with food.

Cereal , is not bad. Pick the right cereal. Carbs are important,particularly for active children who burn their energy quickly ; choose unrefined carbs.

Proteins a fad..... I'm dead