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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask the most ridiculous thing your ex has said?

127 replies

pinkelephantsanddietcoke · 11/08/2019 21:48

Mine is this: 'sorry DS maintenance money didn't come through, I didn't get paid this month as my work has gone into liquidation' works for very well know aviation company which would have definitely been in the news had they not paid their staff and gone into liquidation Biggest joke was him texting DS (15) saying he couldn't stay with him that weekend as he was working overtime! So not only was he working for free through the week he was working extra weekends for nothing too!

OP posts:
LondonSouth28 · 12/08/2019 08:31

This is the single most cathartic thread. I'm not mad and these guys all say the SAME bollocks.

LondonSouth28 · 12/08/2019 08:36

My other recent favourite. WhatsApp exchange with STBXH:
Me: are you coming to sports day then? [it was our 4 year olds first sports day and he had said he would come]
Him: [he reads it and reply comes 5 mins later] I thought it best not to come
Me: because you yelled at me last night about how you wish you'd never met me?! Ok....
Him: plus I have lots of work to do
The truth; without me there to remind him of EVERYTHING he forgot and didn't want to admit it. It's all those things I 'controlled'...

Pinkout · 12/08/2019 08:40

Once accused me of being a Coke whore after we split, I’ve never take drugs in my life. Diet Coke whore, maybe... Grin.

Told me to stop feeding the DC so much fruit and to start buying cheaper clothes and shoes for them so his £150 a month maintenance (for three children) spread further.

Told me he couldn’t see the DC that weekend because it was raining and he didn’t want to drag them out in the bad weather.

Constantly cries poverty and never buys the DC anything outside of his measly maintenance payment, never takes them anywhere either. Yesterday was one of the DC’s birthday and he saw them for two hours. He called me up after two hours and basically asked me to collect them because they were complaining about being hungry... He’d refused to buy them any food, refused to let them go on the bouncy castles and rides because they cost (about £2.50 per child). All they had done was walk around boring shops and go into the playground because it was free. He has gone on holiday twice in the past year with his GF’s children and left ours behind... Wankpot.

Purplecatshopaholic · 12/08/2019 08:49

Loving this thread. God there are some real twats out there. My fave from my ex is I cheated on you because you love the dog more than me... fuckwit

earlydoors42 · 12/08/2019 08:56

While I was still with him and hadn't had any kind of break from the 2 kids for 5 years (he wouldn't even let me go upstairs and leave them downstairs with him, never mind let me go out)... he spent all his days off work having a lie in, going to the pub etc... I said I would like an hour to myself too. He admitted "You don't get time off" and also said "You shouldn't have had them if you didn't want to look after them!"

LadyOfTheFlowers · 12/08/2019 09:10

When deciding how to split childcare etc
"I'll have some (kids) and you can have some, that's fair"

YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan · 12/08/2019 09:10

He said I spend too much time with my daughter and take her to museums, events etc., just to spite him.

It's got nothing at all to do with the fact that I love spending time with her and enjoy going to such places then Hmm

EEmother · 12/08/2019 09:13

"You don't have to pay for the nursery, just find some woman in the neighnourhood who could not have children and is desperate for proxy motherhood, she would be delighted to have them for free just to enjoy them. That's what all other people do."
Not only said, included in his court statement for the financial order.

Sweetpea55 · 12/08/2019 09:19

My ex when were both suffering from the same illness.. ' you look after the kids, I'm staying in bed because you don't look as ill as I feel'

Same turdy bloke.. 'if you ever had a baby it would be retarded because your half retarded anyway'

Mushroomparty · 12/08/2019 09:35

All from the same dude:

"Don't tell me what to do and start doing what I say."
"Stop saving your money, and start spending it on me instead."
"Why can't you want to go for a walk in the rain?"
"5 degrees is not cold" (his excuse so that we'd open the windows instead of using the extracting fan which "cost too much"... He was not poor.)

Mushroomparty · 12/08/2019 09:35

*extractor fac

Mushroomparty · 12/08/2019 09:36

*extractor fan!!!
What's wrong with my fingers today?

GrandTheftWalrus · 12/08/2019 09:39

I wont cheat on you

53rdWay · 12/08/2019 09:40

“I know I’ve been awful to you. But I keep thinking, my dad treated my mum worse than this and she stayed because she loved him. So I feel like if you love me YOU should stay because I haven’t been as bad as he was.”

expectingsoon · 12/08/2019 09:42

'It's not my fault I manipulated you, you're just too easy to manipulate'

whothedaddy · 12/08/2019 09:44

My Ex partner was supposed to see DD on Sunday. He was a no show (this isn't unusual) 3 days later I get a text saying that he was sorry he missed his weekend but he had been in hospital, he fell down a flight of stairs and broke his back. He included a picture in the text.

I reverse google searched the image and it was the top picture on the search when you typed in 'broken back'

He hadn't broken his back at all. I forwarded the messages to his Father so that he was aware he was sending information that made him look mentally unhinged and his father tried to back him up!

These sorts of lies are quite regular- he is a pathalogical liar. The stories make me sick.

wellaloevera · 12/08/2019 10:08

Far too many to count here with my ex but the most recent one was this - DD came home from a weekend with him with a nasty ear infection. I asked him why he hadn't taken her to the doctor/pharmacist for some eardrops (as this is something she gets from time to time). His response? 'I bought the eardrops when she had an infection last year.' Apparently it was my turn to buy medication. Hmm

Beesandcheese · 12/08/2019 10:14

"I know I'm off work but I can't take them to school as you need yo develop the skills to do that on your own, I'm helping you not get conplacent".
Said children had been going to school for a couple of years, with 100% attendance (not that that's particularly important to me!)

Beesandcheese · 12/08/2019 10:15

(Ps I was asking a week ahead as I had an interview)

Beesandcheese · 12/08/2019 10:16

And omg yes. That I was doing fun things with them to make him look bad Hmm

Summerunderway · 12/08/2019 10:25

Exh had a solicitor send me a letter which complained I had blinds fitted and he could no longer see through my windows!
Also raped me 2 weeks pp and when confronted said he knew I was loving it really.
Told my dc my baby had a medical condition (new relationship) as God's punishment for being a prostitute!
*I wasn't a prostitute - just to clear that up!

Sotiredofthislife · 12/08/2019 10:28

Randomly accused me of being a ‘dry alcoholic’.

Told me to ‘commit suicide and do us all a favour’. I genuinely think he can’t understand how anybody could manage to live without him.

But the best one was stating that his refusal to pay maintenance was because ‘you are a fat bitch so will die soon and I’ll have to bring up the children without any maintenance’. 12 years later and I’m still here!!!!

Bookvan · 12/08/2019 10:34

"I carried you financially through our whole marriage. You ripped me off with the divorce settlement."

I worked 2 jobs through our marriage, finished mat leave early to go back to work. Paid for all childcare and half the bills, paid for all our holidays, worked around his shifts, let his family members live with us rent free.
Oh and the divorce settlement, he kept his pension and I got 2/3 of the equity in the house, his suggestion, I just agreed to get it over with with the minimum of fuss. I have no pension and unlikely to ever retire. He'll retire in 15 years on a full salary.

Twat.

ILoveYou3000 · 12/08/2019 10:38

Not said directly to me, but I heard the conversation via speakerphone, he told anyone who would listen that I was blackmailing him for all he had and it was only once I'd taken all his money, that I told his new gf that he'd fathered a child behind her back. Nope, I told his gf at the request of his teenage child who was terrified of him but felt the gf needed to know of other things going on and That same teenager had had to keep her sibling's existence a secret for 4 years and had had enough.

Also with regards to the money, he spent £80 on my child twice in eight years, plus bought one outfit when they were born. He was self-employed but had business in his mum's name and so through CSA I received the whopping sum of £2.50 per week for around 2 years. But I was fleecing him and only cared about money.

Then there was the 'dc isn't mine', despite the fact my poor DC was his spitting image (grown out of it now fortunately). He also told everyone I was refusing a DNA test, so I arranged one. Funnily enough he didn't show. The best part was he came round to see DC, spotted their new school photo and asked me why I had a picture of X. X being his older child from a previous relationship whom my DC is the image of. He didn't know where to look when I pointed that out adding "but DC isn't yours though are they?"

He also beat me up cracking my ribs because I had no "right to question him" on where the money from the remortgage had gone, considering we had work booked on the house, a newborn and bills to pay. He'd spent it on a new car and his new gf.

Then when I made sure I got that money back when we sold the house, he'd had a lien put on it from an outstanding CCJ from
Before we bought the house. He phoned me the day we completed screaming at me to give him his money back as if "wasn't fair" I had ended up with so much more than him and I should be paying half of his debt which he'd had from before we were even together.

Dick. Can't say I'm sorry he's dead.

Casander · 12/08/2019 10:43

I have loads but I'm be of my personal favourites is the letter I had from the CSA after I had claimed for a few months saying he had informed them that DS no longer lived with me, slightly baffled and whilst looking at DS who was very much living in my house I rang them and he had informed them that DS had been taken off me and was now living with my parents.

DS is 14, he hasn't seen or spoken to him since he was 3 months old and we have a non-direct contact order because he was convicted of physically abusing him at 3 months old. Even if DS didn't live with me he would have absolutely no idea! Even CSA lady was like Hmm They made him carry on paying Grin

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