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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this was wrong?

115 replies

StressedD · 11/08/2019 20:15

My friend was walking back from the library at uni last night (she'd gone in to finish some resit assignments and needed to use text books that were reference only). Around 11PM, she posted on fb that, while walking home, her left leg had started dragging and so she sat on a wall outside a shop for a few minutes, only she had been there 30 minutes and couldn't stand. When she still couldn't stand after an hour, she looked on 111 and followed the advice to call 999. We chatted on messenger while she waited for the ambulance to arrive. When it still hadn't turned up at 1.30 am, she called again and was assured the ambulance was on it's way. By this point I was getting worried about her, but I don't live anywhere near her, so couldn't do much to help. Friend told me that, there wasn't much I could do, the ambulance probably wouldn't be much longer, I should go to bed, and she'd let me know how things panned out. It turned out that she was found still sitting on the wall by university security at 2.45am and, when their control room couldn't get through to the ambulance service to get an estimate of how long it would be, they physically lifted her to her feet, put her in their van and rushed her to A&E (5 minutes from the shop she had been sat outside). Thankfully, all her tests showed that she hadn't had a stroke and she was sent home at around 7.30am. My friend keeps saying she was wrong to phone for an ambulance, and feels like a fraud.
I know Saturday nights are busy, but leaving someone who couldn't stand sat on a wall in the cold and rain for over 3 hours isn't right?

OP posts:
Lougle · 11/08/2019 20:26

Was she able to walk when she was discharged?

Unshriven · 11/08/2019 20:29

The ambulance service priorise calls based on medical need.

Not whether the caller is sitting on a wall in the dark with a bad leg.

A cab might have been more use.

PurpleDaisies · 11/08/2019 20:30

Was she able to walk when she was discharged?

That’s not relevant to whether she was right to call an ambulance or how long she should have waited for one.

With those symptoms, she absolutely was right to ring 999. They made the decision that she needed an ambulance. The ambulance should have arrived much sooner.

KittiKat · 11/08/2019 20:30

That is awful! Your poor friend and poor you! You had to worry about her all that time! I am glad she is alright.

I think the reason why the ambulance took so long (did not turn up) is because they felt she was not in immediate danger. Not that they could have known that without assessing her but they would have rated her anyway in the Control Room. Considering how calmly your friend talked to you and told you to go to bed, they might have assumed she was sort of okay. It would have been very unusual for a university student (18-21) to have had a stroke so they would not have assumed or thought of that either. Glad your friend is okay.

And give yourself a hug! You must have been worried silly!

Gruntvsgunt · 11/08/2019 20:31

It’s is a pain to be left waiting so long, but she was breathing and not going to die immediately so wouldn’t have been high priority. The ambulance service are busy and have to triage calls

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 11/08/2019 20:32

The ambulance service have to prioritise unfortunately. Could she not have got a taxi to A&E?

IAskTooManyQuestions · 11/08/2019 20:33

There will have been people worse off than her Im afraid. She should have called a cab or a friend and got her self in side, be that the hospital or home. Hospital presumably being closer if it was a five min drive.

The clue is in 'accident and emergency' - she hadn't been in an accident, and this wasn't an emergency.

Lougle · 11/08/2019 20:35

It's not totally irrelevant, tbh. It's unusual for one leg to start dragging, then to be unable to use either leg. It's also unusual to have a dragging leg, then be totally unable to weight bear. I made the assumption that she was able to walk on leaving A&E (just 4 hours after being taken there) and wanted to check I was right.

Being unable to stand will be some way down the list from heart attacks, clear strokes (most often unilateral weakness), severe bleeding, uncontrolled seizures, etc. Anything life-threatening will take priority.

StressedD · 11/08/2019 20:35

@Unshriven not being able to stand is hardly a "bad leg". And not being able to stand makes getting a taxi just a tiny bit difficult.
I don't know if she was walking when discharged, just that she's now home and feeling like a fraud because her blood tests and other tests didn't show anything.

OP posts:
marchez · 11/08/2019 20:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

munemema · 11/08/2019 20:37

Of course in an ideal world she'd have been taken to hospital quickly but presumably they asked her all the usual questions and established (correctly) that she was in no immediate danger.

As she was so close to the hospital why didn't she call a cab/security/a friend who lived nearer?

What was the problem with her leg?

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 11/08/2019 20:38

So she was in the hospital on a busy Saturday night for 3 hrs 35mins Confused

Booboostwo · 11/08/2019 20:38

WTF?! Your poor friend! She must have been so scared, alone, unable to walk and worrying about the worse!

Is she ok now? What tests did they do? Did they explain why this happened?

If she’s had any back problems she should see a neurologist or orthopedic surgeon to rule out a spinal problem.

Nicknacky · 11/08/2019 20:39

I don’t think there is any debate she needed to go to hospital but given the time of night and how stretched the ambulance service is, did she really need an ambulance and quite honestly the answer is no.

She got to hospital with help and that’s what she should have done earlier.

NameChange84 · 11/08/2019 20:40

Wrong yes but not at all surprising. My mother was sent to hospital by her GP who’d just examined her and who told me I should drive her as it would be quicker than getting an ambulance. It was suspected she was actually having a stroke at the time the GP examined her and she has a history of mini-strokes. The GP phoned ahead to A&E and told them to prepare for her arrival.

We waited for over 6 hours at A&E in the waiting room before she was even seen by a healthcare professional. The waiting room was covered in posters saying “Act Fast” at signs of stroke. It was 12 hours before she saw a Dr and by that time most of her power in her arm and leg (but not all) was returning and he had the audacity to ask what all the fuss was about and accused her of having an anxiety attack. He discharged her immediately but a trainee nurse who’d examined her first phoned the stroke unit with concerns. As a trainee she wasn’t taken seriously but after persistence by this wonderful young woman she was denied a bed but given an appointment at out patients the next day. That consultant found that she had indeed had a mini-stroke and that she had a large blockage in her carotid artery. He was extremely worried that she was going to have a massive bleed on her brain.

This is by no means an isolated story. I hear things like this all the time from family who are HCPs.

StressedD · 11/08/2019 20:41

My friend is a mature student in her late 30's with other chronic health conditions.
Taxi drivers near her will not get out of their car to lift someone to their feet. If you call a cab and can't stand, tough, they'll leave you there.
The only information I've had from my friend since she got home is that she was home and is just feeling drained and wants to sleep. When I'm able to get through on the phone, I'll ask how she got home, but that will probably be tomorrow.

OP posts:
BettysLeftTentacle · 11/08/2019 20:43

Well yeah it’s bad but that’s what’s happening right now. There’s more calls to the emergency services than ever before and less ambulances on the road. Each call has to be prioritised. To every one person sitting on a wall unable to walk (but breathing and heart beating), there could have been at least 5 calls of calls of cardiac arrests amongst other calls of imminent threat to life. They have to prioritise and my betting would be an ambulance was on the way to your friend in a timely manner but got diverted to a more pressing job.

What can anyone do? It’s a shit situation and it’s only going to get worse and no one can do anything about it.

I highly recommend the Ambulance series on BBC1 for those that need a frank outline of exactly how the ambulance service is running right now.

Nicknacky · 11/08/2019 20:43

Did she actually try asking a taxi for help? She just needed help in and out the car. You have no idea that a taxi wouldn’t help.

Humptydumpty85 · 11/08/2019 20:44

Honestly people think being suddenly unable to stand for an hour isn’t worthy of a trip to A&E?! I’m sure you’d just crawl home to bed and make no fuss if it happened to you?

They will respond based on priority, but I think they should have advised her to get a taxi if they knew the wait would be so long. She acted on advice from 111 so has no need to feel guilty.

Funghi · 11/08/2019 20:45

She got to hospital with help and that’s what she should have done earlier.

Agreed.

She could have googled the number for university security or called a taxi. Instead she posted on fb, messaged you and sat for nearly 4 hours with a phone yet tried no alternatives.

Funghi · 11/08/2019 20:46

If you call a cab and can't stand, tough, they'll leave you there.

How could you know this?

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 11/08/2019 20:46

I recently did have a massive brain bleed, won't talk about ignoring-it-but, but once I was in A&E was in front of the doctor in 15 minutes and in the CT scanner in an hour. It all ran like clockwork. It wasn't a Saturday night though, not sure how that would have worked. Anyway I had a nurse, CT scan, MRI scan, two doctors, stroke nurse and a bed in neurosurgery all in under 2 hours. Get ill here!

I'm sorry that your friend is feeling so drained. She is probably exhausted on top of everything else.

Nicknacky · 11/08/2019 20:47

No one has said she shouldn’t get medical help?

munemema · 11/08/2019 20:47

No-one has said she didn't need to go to A&E Humpty -it's thinking that it should be a high priority for an over stretched ambulance service that is the issue. Yes, ideally she wouldn't have had to wait so long but she wasn't in any immediate danger and they obviously had other calls that were assessed as higher priority. No-one chose to leave her there for fun.

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 11/08/2019 20:48

Sorry my monologue was to namechanged84 swore I typed that! Hope your mum is doing ok now and that systems are changing.

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