To be worried that my daughter will get fat if left to her own devices?

[narisha99]

I am worried about DD10 and her love of junk food, white carbs and anything sweet! She is tall for her age, has started puberty and has always been a solid build. She is not overweight but, is very close to becoming overweight and I fear that as she gets older and I naturally have less control over what she eats (ie when a teen and out with friends) that she would easily become overweight.

At the moment I am able to control / limit her food and can push her in the direction of healthy eating and making good choices. BUT she is always pining for the bad choices and given any chance to indulge (ie at a party, buffett restaurant etc when left to her own devices) she heads straight for the less healthy options etc.

My goal is to change her mindset so that she understands and wants to eat healthily through her own choice, not because I said so. But I don't seem to be able to do that!

She also seems to constantly be asking / thinking / wanting food irrespective of what she has actually consumed

I have tried to explain it and educate her but clearly I am not getting it right.

(For context, my older DC has no problem with eating sensibly, healthy and knowing their limits)

Any recommendations for resources that I could use with her? Or ideas on how to approach this?

Sorry for the slow reply, and whilst sorry to hear that there are others in the same boat - I guess its kind of reassuring I am not the only one.

Re the comments about controlling can make it forbidden and more desirable - this is exactly why I want to foster a natural desire for her to be able to self regulate. I have tried to let her make her own decisions but she just does not make good decisions - and at this young age it's hard for her to understand the consequences as they not visible and immediate

It's her desire for the less healthy options that worries me. Ie Kids are asking for a snack in between meals (fine it's been a while) - my answer is always fruit or if something more substantial is warranted I'll offer (no added sugar) peanut butter on toast. But she will be the one who asks for the ice creams in the freezer, or remembers there is leftover pasta/pie/ sausage roll from a previous meal or requests 2 slices of bread, and wants Jam on it, and the promptly asks for more! Meanwhile everyone else happy with an apple!

She is not naturally sporty and would much prefer to sit and do artwork rather than anything physical, but she is quite active at school (PE / Sport every day) and thankfully loves the trampoline and swimming so can spend hours doing that! We are quite active as family lots of walking and cycling so I do try and enourage that kind of activity.

She is quite interested in food and cooking and that is something I am working on (and love the tip and out trying out main dishes with fruit in).

@amusedbush - this is exactly what I am worried about if I don't handle it in the right way

I think there are some great tips here for rethinking about what she eats and when, and certainly there are improvements to be had.

I have started to raise the topic with her that you need to burn off more calories that you eat (in a science kind of way) - maybe I need to focus on that more