It is just one day - but probably also the only day in your life where nearly everyone you love is in the same place at the same time. That was so special to me.
This!
It's over 20 years since I married (since divorced) and especially as an army brat - who was marrying in too - that's the part that meant the most to me. My family are scots but my closest friends are also army brats and from all over the country, and this is still the only time I've been able to get everyone I love together in the one place (with a very few exceptions), and one of my fondest memories is that of them having a great time together - inc my friends daughter who was my flower girl, showing my grans (in their 70's at the time) how to do whigfields Saturday night dance, another friend talking to my uncle and sharing their love of a particular film franchise, another 2 friends from completely different locations and seemingly with little in common discovering they went to the same uni just a few years apart and sharing stories about that, and they all had the biggest smiles! That was by far the best bit.
And now all these years later, several of those people have passed away, the grandparents somewhat not unexpectedly of course, but a few who really should still be here and I'm so glad I have those memories.
I've also worked in the industry and really struggled with balancing doing my job (esp the "leave your conscience at the food" upselling) with my own knowledge and experience of my own and family/friends weddings. Quite honestly the most expensive weddings I've been involved in were all VERY similar (though the couples would likely disagree) it's the cheaper, usually smaller weddings that were more individual - I think because budgetary constraints mean you have to be more inventive?
I had a traditional, pretty big (kinda hard not to as I'm from a big Catholic family and I actually love my family and I'm close to aunts/uncles/cousins) but budget "church & village hall" white wedding, but we kept expense to a minimum and it was a fantastic day - not just my opinion, as usually happens a lot of our peers were marrying around the same time and several not only said they'd had a great time but some even made decisions about their own weddings based on ours (nothing major, but realising things like they didn't HAVE to have a 3 course sit down meal or favours or flowers on every table or even a band as opposed to a dj - our dj was great and he got bookings off our wedding!
As did our photographer who was 'cheap' as he was just starting out (friend of a colleague) but very personable, didn't keep people hanging about too much and very open to unusual ideas - for then, at this time most people were still just having the "normal" posed shots with a few "candids" - in our case (outs self) he shot the "scramble" from a variety of angles, did some shots of JUST the child guests (I know verboten on mn - not only HAVING child guests but liking the fact) inc a "ring-a-roses" one and "girls fighting the boys" - playfully - one, and one with all the grandparents laughing raucously, we weren't present for that one and never did find out the joke he used!
Yes it's only one day, and I would say don't waste money on the things nobody will remember - decorations mainly, but also don't fret about things like the font on the invitations, whether your veil has a ribbon trim or a lace one, the music for the ceremony...
What guests tend to remember...well I'm reminded of a maya Angelou quote:
I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
Make your guests feel loved, welcome and valued and little else matters.