to ask what you did for your hen night

[hereforit]

And how much it cost?

I'm not married, or dating. Just curious. Had to say no to a friend's hen as they wanted £200+ for a hotel, then gowns that said 'bride' etc on them then matching ones for us. Then other bits and bobs. Then considering an activity like paintballing.

This was all for 1 night away...

I hate the idea of buying clothes I'll never wear again. It's a waste, and also, £200 just for the hotel for one night to me it just nuts! It did include a meal and breakfast but I just don't get the need for it..

Am I a proper grouch?

Had to say no a couple of years back too as a friend wanted a hen do in Spain. It was going to cost £1000 plus...

AIBU to think it is all really stupid and pointless?

First night was at our house (DH was away in his stag) - food, fizz, silly games.
Second night we went to York and stayed in a hotel. We went on a river cruise, went to the hotel spa and out for dinner followed by drinks.
The dress code for the hens was black with coloured feather boas. Easy as most people have black dress or trousers and a top. I wore a pink dress and black feather boa.
It was a lovely weekend and not too expensive ( we shared rooms).

Me and some of the more hardcore ones went to a nightclub, but it wasn't much to get in.

A friend of mine hired a huge holiday home in the lakes for the weekend. It was great and even had a swimming pool! Her family arranged for loads of food and booze to be delivered. We spent the days walking, pubbing and doing activities and the evenings eating, drinking and partying. It was great.

Currently in the planning stages of mine and would probably just enjoy a day or night out with friends and maybe something lower key like an afternoon tea or spa day for family.

Grabbed some takeaway and then went to a store opening of a friend of a friend. Sipped some cheap wine and bought Christmas ornaments. (A party animal, I am not)

My best friend and I, my sister and her friend. We played pool and had a curry. Twenty eight years ago. Fab night. Do not see the need to spend daft amounts of money on a weekend away but I accept I may be very old.
If you have the time and money to do extravagant things then great.
It's not my thing and never was.
DH on the other hand got absolutely wellied and I had to scrape him off a friend's toilet.
Still together after all that time.

I’ve never been married but I organised my sisters.

She had two. First was afternoon tea (£14.99 in a local place) on a Saturday afternoon. It was for all the Nans/pregnant ladies/ones who didn’t fancy a night out.

Second was a pub crawl ending at a cheesy nightclub in our home town. DDad did taxiing to and fro and people stayed at my parents. So about £30 - £40 all in including a dirty burger and chips at the end of the night. I bought little temporary tattoos we all had on our wrists that said Team Bride, bit twee but better than a honking big sash.

People were more than welcome to come to one, both or neither.

Had my sister and a few friends round for the weekend. We played board games, pitched a tent in the garden (because the house was tiny!), and had a BBQ and drinks. Then we had a Disney marathon the next day. Only cost was the food/drinks and travel for my sister. Not everyone's cup of tea but we enjoyed ourselves!

Pub / club night out..£100...reasonable..
Hotels cottages, black sky blue pink outfits that cost 100s,, pile of nonsense..did one last year had to be rescued by OH...bunch of psycho bitches...

Pub meal with 3 friends, stayed over at one of the friend's houses on their floor, then drove to the beach to eat chips.

When I have one, it'll be a meal and drinks after somewhere local. Maybe a spa day for me and my mum if funds allow.

I get that alot of brides want to have a big thing nowadays, as long as they understand that alot of people can't afford it so won't come. When they get arsey about it, that's what pisses me off.

For mine we went to Forbidden Corner (large outdoor area with lots of curiosities), then out for a meal and went for a few cocktails afterwards.

For friends we have had a variety of events from the more simple group meal out and dancing, to a weekend away driving tanks and making cocktails in the rented cottage. None of these events has been £100+ to attend (the bride paid for the tanks as she wanted everyone to join in and we had all just finished uni). For one friend we did a mad hatters tea party at her house with silly games (and wine in teapots) before going out for a meal.

Not me, but close relative booked a room in local restaurant / pub. We decorated it, had a meal, played a few games, had a quiz then a dance. Probably about 15 people in total. It was a great night on a budget.

Went out to a local high street that is full of bars, clubs etc. Did a cocktail making class which cost about £20, had some food and then went drinking around the high street. It was really good fun! Everyone felt relaxed and happy to spend money as it cost so little for a taxi there and back.

Went for a meal in a lovely local restaurant with a group of friends. Lots had small children so this worked out brilliantly for us all to get together without massive childcare drama or BF mums being away from their LO for too long. I got to see everyone together and it was a hugely enjoyable evening.

Then went away for a week with my MOH to a destination we'd both always wanted to go (we were both child free at this point unlike many of our friendship circle).

I paid for both (MOH did take her own spending money but I paid for flights and accommodation). Had an amazing time.

I did nothing the first time and.nothing the second time . I am quite an extrovert and like evenings out but for some reason.I.had no desire for a.hen night . I also didn't have an engagement ring for either marriage and a kept my maiden - my choice both times . Maybe I a bit weird !!

Had a nice lunch out with a couple of close friends. I am not a fan of traditional hen nights.weekends - forcing people who don’t know each other to have “fun” together, the expense, the god-awful dress codes, sashes, chocolate wellies - the list goes on. I’ve never enjoyed one that I have attended, and didn’t want to subject my friends and family to one!

*willies!!!

I did afternoon tea. Low cost. Everyone enjoyed it. Only did it because so many people asked if I was having a hen do.

Centuries ago when I got married you only had a hen night. Not several no week/ends away. No forced ‘fun’ at everyone’s expense

I just went to the pub where a random man tried to persuade me not to go through with it - should have listened we’re divorced now!!

I went abroad for mine, just with my 3 closest friends. We go away every year anyway so it wasn't too out of the ordinary. I also had a boozy night out in my city with all my friends and colleagues a couple of weeks before the wedding.
I love going out and would love a destination hen! But I know I'm in the minority here.

Sweet Fanny Adams - perfect for me 😆

Not me but my best friend's hen do is going to be either a chocolate making class then dinner and drinks in the next city over from us or champagne afternoon tea then a show at the theatre then maybe a cocktail or two. She hasn't decided yet

I went for an afternoon tea - it was £15 a head and then whoever wanted came for a few cocktails and then a few of us had a pub meal in the local.

Bearing in mind that I got married in the year 2000 we went on a pub crawl where we live with my mum, aunts, friends and in laws. What a laugh we had, I had a silly dress to wear and we just had good fun.

No matching t shirts, no fancy clothes, no hotel or flights away. I wanted a minimal spend night that was fun.

Archery, bunny show hopping, painted a canvas and then had a bbq with the stags.