To ask for lists of things that would make the world a nicer place if people did them

[Bearbehind]

I posted yesterday about things that I’d noticed others do which seemed selfish, and it seems the problem is that people don’t always think about how their actions might affect others.

So if you could list the things that wind you up that would make life nicer with very little effort.

My top one would be to park considerately - I lose count of the number of times I see people who’ve blocked others in, parked across 2 spaces, made roads impassable for emergency services.

What other things do you wish people thought a bit more about?

How do you control where cats go?

And stopping their cats from roaming and doing their poo everywhere

Cats can only be prevented from roaming by keeping them in the house. They are natural roomers. Sorry.

I echo the non-littering.
Don’t get drunk in public.
Don’t drive with loud music blaring and windows down.

Don’t commit crimes and be nice to people.

Don’t hog big tables in bars restaurants and cafes when they’re busy if you don’t need all the seats

to use their indicators while driving and pick up after their dogs 💩

Be brave and complement people, even random strangers.....
If you think 'I love her shoes' tell her...

Don’t hog big tables in bars restaurants and cafes when they’re busy if you don’t need all the seats

Well if it’s the only table available then I don’t think it’s unreasonable to sit at it.

Should solo people and couples just stand around to allow big groups to have priority?

Should solo people and couples just stand around to allow big groups to have priority?

I was meaning people who choose a bigger table than they need when smaller ones are available.

Don't spit in the street, especially if you are going to alert everyone around you by making a loud, extravagant hawking noise first.

Be kind.
Merge in turn.
Indicate when driving.
Don't smoke or vape.
Refuse, reuse and then recycle.
Don't have children because you think it's expected.
Be considerate - from bbq's on the beach to leaving dog mess people seem to think they don't need to consider the impact they have on others at all. Yes, you do.
Politically - we can only reduce car use if facilities are local and transport is good. Year's or encouraging 'out of town' shopping and housing estates with no facilities mean for most people driving is essential.

Not back out of commitments at the last minute.
Don't leave making a commitment until the last minute
Use less heavy fragrance or air fresheners. That includes body spray!
Pick up your litter
Park in parking spaces, not blocking the pavement
Stop using your mobile phone while walking
Be more courteous
Don't complain - do something about it, or shut up

Another vote for not leaving litter.
Don't play music so loud that your neighbours can hear it.
Obey the speed limits.

It seems like so, so many of these things people are saying are about limits and consideration. For example, things like scents, volume, and waste. Someone mentioned no music on the tube, even in headphones. It should be no audible music. I use headphones, but you can’t hear my music outside of them because I don’t want to go deaf by the time I’m 60 and if your headphones are so loud the music can be heard outside of them, then you are damaging your hearing, including delicate bits that don’t “grow back.” Especially with inner ear headphones. With scents, there needs to be a limit. It won’t be perfect and it will still affect some allergy sufferers but it should be that a scent shouldn’t be strong enough to be smelt X feet away or linger for X amount of time or something. And as for waste, some areas are trying to put limits on that, with no plastic sacks, etc. We just need more.

As for consideration, I think it’s people treating others how they want to be treated. That’s what I want. Most people wouldn’t want their dog shite left on their front steps, so why do they leave it anywhere else? Just pick it up. They wouldn’t want someone to be rude to them on the phone, so don’t be rude to receptionists, etc. They wouldn’t want someone to treat them like shite if they were a restaurant server, so they need to not treat servers that way. And it’s about acting kindly even when you have every excuse not to (you had a bad day, everything is going wrong, other people have been shite to you all day, you’ve received bad news, on and on).

If you can be kind to others even on your worst day, you ARE making the world better in a very important way. Even if you haven’t got two pence in your bank account, even if you haven’t felt you’ve accomplished anything that day or week or month, even if your personal life is in shambles, by being kind when you have every reason not to be, YOU are what’s right with the world.

Stop thinking that supermarket aisles are the ideal place to have a lengthy catch-up with friends.

I keep thinking about the fragrance point - I guess there’s a divide here in terms of what the points require and how they affect other people

Most comments are things that are easy for people to do, they don’t really impact the person doing / not doing whatever it is and are for everyone’s benefit

Whereas the fragrance point requires a lot of people to stop doing something that will affect them if they like perfume / aftershave etc, for the benefit of a few

If someone says good morning to you, say good morning back !

My daughter has anaphylaxis to peanuts and I have no problem asking people not to eat them on planes. Most people are decent and are happy to comply because they realise she would be in genuine danger otherwise. That’s asking lots of people to stop doing something for the benefit of a few. Believe me, the few are genuinely grateful.

Stop being so judgemental.

You only see a moment in their life or even if you live next door, unless you know them properly, you have no idea what is going on in their lives. Keep your opinions to yourself, by voicing them, the chances are you are making a crap situation for that person worse.

You asked about simple kindness. For some of us, a bad run in with fragrance can mean death. I’m not talking about getting a stuffy nose or a headache.

Didn’t realize that asking people to curb their fragrance use, which is wholly unnecessary, was unreasonable in the simple kindness category. I didn’t ask that they be banned. I asked that people consider others when they choose that highly scented shampoo or spray on some
Perfume.

And

Indicate at roundabouts for crying out loud. It's not hard, we were all taught it to pass the test.

I don’t think they should allow peanuts on planes as it’s so dangerous for some people and isn’t really a big deal to not allow them.

But that’s not really the kind of thing this thread is about - there’s lots of things that might make a few people’s lives better so they suggest them but i was more talking about little things that make most people’s lives better.

I'm afraid I have to agree with @Bearbehind regarding fragrance use, wearing a bit of perfume would never be classed as antisocial in the same way as people gobbing in the street, smoking in doorways and putting dirty feet on seats on public transport.

purple I can’t really understand how most people can curb fragrance use - surely you basically squirt it on your wrists and neck and that’s it?

I know a few people bathe in it but they are the exception.

Likewise you mentioned the detergent aisle in supermarkets - what can be done about that?

Stop being so judgemental

What comment was that referring to pete?

I was meaning people who choose a bigger table than they need when smaller ones are available.

The problem with that is that as a frequently solo or couple diner, the cafe/restaurant quite often has really uncomfortable cramped seating for singles/couples - most commonly in London, low backless stools or worse, bar stools with no foot rests, but the bigger tables usually have proper chairs. As someone with dodgy vertebrae in my lower back, I can’t sit comfortably for 45 minutes on a low stool, so I often end up on a table for 4 once I explain my predicament.

The best restaurant I’ve ever been to actually reserved the best seat in the house (at the front of the restaurant overlooking the sea) for solo diners. I was part of a big group that day but was seriously impressed. It made commercial sense as well as there’s a higher likelihood that someone is blogging/instagramming their visit if they go to the effort to visit a fancy restaurant alone.