Anyone who didn't have a horrendous menopause experience?

[blankstares]

I'm perimenopausal at 45 and terrified of the menopause. I don't want to lose my sex drive (I love sex!), put on loads of weight, grow facial hair and have insomnia.

Is there anyone who had a mild menopause or who didn't suffer from the above? Am I destined to go through hell or are these symptoms exaggerated? I have spoken to my elderly mum but she can't remember what it was like and friends just moan about the lack of sleep and weight gain. Please reassure me it won't be that bad or there are ways of alleviating some of the symptoms! I already have terrible sleep.

You get fat, grow a beard and can't sleep? Awesome - I've already been doing those for twenty years, if you add to that not having fucking periods anymore, it sounds a doddle!

I actually asked for a blood test to check if I'd 'been through' it. Had no symptoms at all! I had a full hysterectomy 10 years ago when I was early 40s and was told that this would 'kick-start' the menopause. Nothing happened!

Blood test confirmed I have, indeed, completed any menopause that I'm going to go through...👍

NB: Weight gain...I cannot, hand on heart, blame anything other than gluttony and lazy-itus 🤦‍♀️😂

I'm 53 and still peri-menopause. Irregular periods, but they are shorter and only heavy for the first night. Used to be regular as clockwork:every 28 days for 5 days. Hairy chin: always had the odd stray hair but there are a few more now. I do wonder if I'd have a full beard if I didn't check and pluck the odd one daily. Occasionally have a hot flush but not as in a sodden sheets sweating kind of way. Mood swings/anxiety : possibly, but I have found mindfulness and tweaking my diet helpful. Sex: slowed down slightly but still active and happy with it. No discomfort with sex.
I'm aware it could yet get bad, but so far, so good!

Ps I have been within normal weight guidelines for my height all my life and it doesn't seem to have altered much. I am very active (not in a gym bunny way) which probably helps.

I had horrendous periods as a teen, vomiting, on for 7 days soaking through both a tampon and a padin an hour.

I'd been on depo for years but due to being away from home and not needing contraception I missed the jab, then I missed another, my periods started to happen every 3 months, a bit of bleeding for 2 days, the stopped. After about a year my periods just stopped.

I had a single hot flush one night,

I have the same sex drive and no other symptoms.

I like to think itis Karma that I had problems when young and none now.

I think bigger boobs can be part of it. Had Prostap to induce menopause prior to surgery fairly recently and within days I kind of inflated, my chest in particular- which wasn’t particularly small in the first place.

I had early menopause aged 41 and zero symptoms, periods just stopped one day. I’m 48 soon and feel I’m growing older and have some health issues GERD, increased allergies but nothing I can put down to post menopause.

No hot flushes (except one for about 10 seconds once), nothing - periods just stopped! Feel better than I have done since I was 15 - no PMT, no cyclical pain with benign cysts, no periods, no pregnancy....

Fantastic!

I'm 55... Fifty flippin five... and not there yet. Periods regular as ever. Fifty flippin five...

I was told that a little extra weight actually helped during menopause, because the fat helped to hold on to oestrogen? No idea if this is the case, but I was around two stone heavier than I am now when I actually underwent the menopause (presumably, having had no symptoms I'm not really sure quite when it happened). I've lost the weight since (mostly over the last year). I do have to work harder to keep the weight off, though (but that's because I like cake way too much, nothing to do with being post menopausal I don't think).

Didn't even realise I'd gone through mine till I looked at my calendar and saw I hadn't had a period for 15 months. They'd just got lighter and more irregular. No hot flushes or anything.

I've made a bit of an effort and lost 4 stone and feel better and happier than I have for decades. I really feel my 60s are my golden years, touch wood and good health allowing.

I had some hot flushes, enough to make me get up and shower and change, in the night, for a short while. But that was it.

I already had insomnia, don’t think it made it worse, in fact I havnt had a period in 7 years, and the insomnia has only got worse in the last 3. But I’m being investigated for Cushings Disease, which is what I think is causing that.

I was about 59 when my periods finally stopped. Zero symptoms here too. I didn't gain weight or grow a beard though I do get the odd chin hair. I feel fine though I do get the odd bout of insomnia.

To be honest,I don't recall even going through the menopause! I know I must have done though,as I'm 56 in two months. I haven't had a period since I was 43,but this was due to having an Mirena IUS. I'd had one since the age of 35,to help with excessively heavy and painful periods, (worked brilliantly btw) and a couple of years after having the second one,my periods dwindled down to nothing.
I've had none of the usual menopausal symptoms such as insomnia, (I've suffered from insomnia on and off since my early twenties!) and it certainly hasn't got any worse since the menopause.
My sex drive is exactly the same,if anything it's better. . No discomfort during sex either due to dryness.
I've not had depression,or forgetfulness,or weight gain. No night sweats either. The only symptom I HAVE had is the occasions hot flush,started when I was about 51,still get them very occasionally now.
Was interested to notice upthread that someone had posted that they also had a Mirena,and wondered whether that had ease menopausal symptoms. I would be interested to know whether this is the case.

@BeyindMyWits

My periods only stopped this year, I am 58. There are advantages as it does seem to hold back other symptoms.

Having said that I get the occasional warm feeling but that's about it. I definitely feel a weakening of the pelvic floor though.

BeyondMyWits Wow!

No real issues here. I was menopausal by 51 and didn’t really notice it. I had hot flushes and still do occasionally but they don’t bother me. As other people have said it’s harder to lose weight now and I have to stay on top of facial hair but apart from that no problems. I like not having periods anymore.

I’m the youngest at 58 in my group of friends. I’m the only one who has had a rough time of it going through the menopause. None of the others (between 59-66) have had more than an occasional flush. My late DM also didn’t really have problems with it either. So while my flushes etc are grim and I have ended up on HRT, I’m the exception out of the women I know. Those that don’t have any trouble with it don’t tend to be very vocal about it so you probably only read/hear those who are or have suffered. It really isn’t the case that menopause = nightmare.

Physically mine hasn’t been bad barring some nightsweats and insomnia, which acupuncture seemed to help. I haven’t put on weight. I did ramp up my exercise regime, though, and don’t usually drink in the week.

But I recently I noticed a flat mood, not depressed but excited by things that usually really interest me and make me happy. So i have decided that for this reason and for the health benefits in the future I would HRT. I’m paying to see a private specialist as ten minutes at the GP’s doesn’t seem enough to go through all the questions I have. Also our local practice seems to put everyone on the same thing, which makes me a bit concerned.

Plus not having any PMT (which was always hell for me) or periods is wonderful. I still appreciate it 4 years after they’ve stopped.

I'm 56 and don't know if I've had the menopause yet or not. Have had a few hot flushes, but nothing more than that. I read somewhere that once you've not had a period for a year, you can assume it's over, but I go nearly a year and then have a very light show (that barely warrants a tampon), and wonder if I should start counting again.
I've always been quite lucky, period-wise. Regular, light, no pain and I fell pregnant first month of trying each time. Maybe that's linked???

One thing that puzzles me is that all my life people have been banging on about how menopause is the last taboo and no one talks about it or writes about it. IME magazines are full of features about it, it’s constantly discussed on tv and radio, Amazon has over 6000 titles about menopause and my friends never seem to shut up about it. For middle aged women it seems to replace education as the fall back conversation topic.

I started the menopause over ten years ago.
Hot flushes,a little facial hair,sex drive still good.periods stopped Eight years ago but an occasional show.
Got to the point we women just have to get on with it.

I'm 52 and peri menopausal. Periods are at the one-two, miss a few stage. When they do come they are lighter and shorter.

I'm definitely generally warmer, but not at soaking sheets at night level.

My bust is bigger - I had assumed that was due to muscles relaxing, so interesting to hear that it's a sign of menopause.

I've always struggled with my weight, so it's hard to tell whether the additional pounds are due to menopause or just that I'm in my 50s now so if I want the chocolate I have it!

I'm probably going to get shot down in flames for this one, but... OP, remember at school how hysterical some girls were about starting and having their periods? I think it's those same girls, now women, who are hysterical about the menopause.

Keep an open mind, don't panic and whatever you need to get through it;,HRT, wine, chocolate take it

I find my husband doesn't like talking about it. It may be his age -- he is 66 and comes from a family where nothing was ever talked about. The word hormone seems to make him very nervous.

But when I explained things like extra risk of breaking a hip because of osteoporosis and cardio-vascular protection and preserving sharpness of thinking and thus earnings, he became less embarrassed...