Ex won’t come home AIBU

[Littleteacup1]

Ex partner and I broke up seemed mutual at the time but since he’s realised he can’t live with out me. He’s cried so much and keeps threatening to commit suicide as he can’t live with out me. He has previous mental Health issues but help hasn’t helped. 2 weeks ago he threatened to end his life and walked out I called the police he had a go at me. Since then he keeps going away for the night to try and end it. I’m so upset at it all I keep panicking about him ending his life he has no family and won’t except help. People keep saying he won’t do it and so far he hasn’t as he always comes home. Last night he went out said good bye it felt so real but I didn’t want to believe it he never came home his phone was off and he still wasn’t home At 5 in the morning all day I’ve had no contact until tonight to say he didn’t want to ruin my day out so turned his phone off I kept crying all day and couldn’t sleep at all last night he’s apparently tried to hang himself but the branch broke and he passed out. I called the police but as he’s not missing they won’t do anything. I’m sat at home with worry but I can’t get to wear he his I’m so upset I keep crying I want to help but I can’t and any service he tries to ring can’t help I know I can’t stop him if he really wants to go he will find away it’s just the constant I’m going to go and then he dosnt I really thought he had gone This time

Last night I updated 111 on him being gone for 24 hours this morning I updated them to say his phones been switched back on x

I cried all last night over worry and stress x

Sadly, I've known three close friends/family in my lifetime that have taken their own lives. None of them gave the slightest hint of their intentions to anyone close to them, they just did it. I've also known several people who have threatened suicide. None of them have followed through barring the odd attempt that never stood the remotest chance of success.

You need to stop him playing you, because that is what he's doing. You can't stop him doing it if he really decides to but so far he's given you more than enough evidence to believe he is not serious.

Get him out of your life before he grinds you down so much that you're the one having suicidal thoughts.

Stop. Just stop.

You’re not responsible for his mental health

Stop chasing him, stop updating the emergency services, stop taking his drama and making it your own.

It’s clearly unhealthy for you to be living together. One of you will have to take a step away until the house issue can be resolved

The only way to stop all of this is to stop it.

You’re engaging way too much.

The house needs to be sold, it’s as simple as that.

Tell him you’re contacting an estate agent today.

Can you move in with your mum until it’s sold?

Honestly, the drama is partially your fault. If you engage every single time then why would he stop? You’re wasting police time.

If he’s only threatening for attention then he’ll stop when he doesn’t get it.

IF he really needs help then you can’t give it to him anyway. If he kills himself it will be very sad but nothing to do with you.

I mean, who gives a shit about a mulberry bag?? How is that something you’re even posting about??? “I’ve always wanted one.” Really???

Ignore him. Sell the house. Buy the bag.

Cut him out your life he's manipulative

He is emotionally abusing you. It's hard to switch off but you need to stop engaging with it all. It's like a child eventually if you ignore it it will stop. I had an ex that did this and I became a stone wall totally none reactive he upped his game and allegedly tried to kill himself but that didn't work. I just rang the police each time. Inside I was terrified for him and of him but I just stuck to the script. It eventually stopped and he moved on. Really do not engage. I wish you well😀

OP I agent many years working with victims and perpetrators of domestic abuse, what he's doing is a very common control tactic, and yes it may stem from his fear of losing the relationship/control. The more he does this and if he is genuinely suicidal the more of a risk he poses to you and I mean this very seriously. If he feels he has nothing left to lose (because he doesn't plan on living) he has no concern for consequences.

OP the sooner you aren't living with him, the better. He is using your emotions to keep you in place, he knows you won't be able to stop worrying about him. The only person who can put an end to this is you.

Wtf dug this up? Knock it off with the zombie threads ffs.

Give the bag to a womens aid. Have no involvement, you deserve peace of mind. Don't let the fact that he's worn you down over time weaken your resolve. It's not your problem, what would you say to a friend in your shoes? Toughen up and distance yourself. Get a new phone number...

@VioletLemon

Give the bag to a womens aid. Have no involvement, you deserve peace of mind. Don't let the fact that he's worn you down over time weaken your resolve. It's not your problem, what would you say to a friend in your shoes? Toughen up and distance yourself. Get a new phone number...

This!