Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this woman isn't coming back for her cat?

87 replies

darkriver19886 · 31/07/2019 23:24

In October a friend of mine put out a call on Facebook for someone to look after a cat for a "couple of weeks"

It sounds like the woman concerned had to move for whatever reason and she said she would pay more than the cat's upkeep.

I took the lovely cat on called Pepper. Her son paid me £30 when she was dropped off and when the woman came to visit she paid me another £20.

I sent her regular updates and pictures of the cat. I haven't had a response since April. It's just dawned me that she hasn't even seen my messages.

Am I wrong to think that this woman isn't coming back? And I have strangely acquired a cat.

OP posts:
S1naidSucks · 01/08/2019 00:47

I was supposed to be 'babysitting' a dog for a month. She ended up with us for six years

looks at foster dog that was supposed to be here for a week, which has turned into three weeks! Confused chews fingers 😟

el1zabeth · 01/08/2019 00:51

Your initial post says a friend of mine put out a call on Facebook for someone to look after a cat Do you still have the friend and does he/she know what happened to the woman?
I wouldn't give Pepper back, and anyway she's obviously yours now, but I'd be interested to know what happened to the 'disappearing woman'

BlackCatSleeping · 01/08/2019 00:52

She’s a beautiful cat 💕

If she’s been happy being a house cat, I’d keep her as a house cat. It’s so much safer for her.

I’d take her to the vet for a check up and get vaccinations. It seems like her old owner is no longer able to take care of her.

VenusTiger · 01/08/2019 00:57

She’s amazing and sounds like she’s blessed you!
There’s no way I’d give her up even if previous owner asked!
Get her to the vets and they can give her a once over, check her teeth etc. (that should tell her approx. age) also get them to scan her and find details with identichip so you can change her details over to yours. Also they can tell you if she’s been spayed.
Good luck to you and your best friend!
From a —mad— cat lover

flumposie · 01/08/2019 00:59

Aw glad you and Pepper have found each other even if it is in this way. I lost my beautiful 15 year old cat recently and I'm heartbroken still so enjoy your time together.

Al2O3 · 01/08/2019 01:01

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BrendasUmbrella · 01/08/2019 01:03

No contact in over three months?! She doesn't deserve Pepper.

Justaboy · 01/08/2019 01:23

No contact in over three months?! She doesn't deserve Pepper

Indeed!, but i wonder before you get too attached to her you ought to contact the "former" owner to see what her intentions are, she may not for whatever reason be not able to take her back and may well be too embrassed to talk about it.

OTOH she may well be possibly about to ask if she can now have her back.

But if she can't keep her you'll make a good mum to her!

And since when do cats have "owners" other way round welll so it seems here with our old moggy!

Original poster
darkriver19886 · 01/08/2019 01:31

I can't sleep and had a peak in the woman's Facebook. ( we weren't official friends) She posted up until the beginning of July. She hasn't posted since. I will message my friend and see if she knows anything in the morning.

OP posts:
Aridane · 01/08/2019 01:36

Never mind the cat - is the woman OK?

Brain06626 · 01/08/2019 01:55

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/08/2019 01:58

I’ve gotten 2 cats this way. I just told the previous owners that the cat is mine now. In both cases the owners were relieved. I was pretty blunt about about it in both cases and didn’t offer the option of them reclaiming the cat.

The first time it was a nice guy who was a friend, but he couldn’t take care of himself much less the cat. The second and most recent was a young woman who found herself pregnant and moving back in with her family...I believe she intended to reclaim the cat, but it had gotten to the point he had spent more time with us than her originally. We heard she was sad, but agreed it was for the best.

This is also why I don’t allow feline guests if I’m not prepared to keep them forever.

IAskTooManyQuestions · 01/08/2019 03:43

The woman hasn't read messages since April? I hate to be the portend of doom but she might be dead. Wonder why she had to flee quickly in October ….

Original poster
darkriver19886 · 01/08/2019 04:13

She posted regularly on Facebook up until Beginning of July.

OP posts:
proudestofmums · 01/08/2019 07:07

We have always had cats. In our first married home next door’s cat, who,was gorgeous, spent a lot of time in our garden with ours. His servants had to move 200 miles away and asked us to look after him until they found a place to buy as their temporary rented place didn’t allow pets. We looked after him for 6 months and of course adored him. He used to sit on my lap with his paws round my neck. To our shock, they came back for him! I sat in the front step weeping buckets as they drive him away!

GetMeOffThisCycleOfMisery · 01/08/2019 10:03

She's beautiful. If you're happy to keep her, then that's great, she's got an owner that cares for her.

My only concern would be what if she rocks up on your doorstep in a year demanding her bac Not sure where you, or stands legally. Perhaps you can get some advice from CAB, or a solicitor's first hour free appointment.

Spidey66 · 01/08/2019 10:21

Pepper's cute. If I didn't have a cat hating dog, I'd have it.

Vesperia · 01/08/2019 10:31

she's probably not coming back. don't understand how people can do that, my cat passed away in January & I miss her every single day

Orlandointhewilderness · 01/08/2019 11:09

She is a beauty!

DuMondeB · 01/08/2019 11:21

I think she’s morally and emotionally yours now, but if you can, get it in writing that the old owner isn’t coming back for her and then get her chipped/have her chip updated as belonging to you, so she is legally yours too.

CloudRusting · 01/08/2019 11:24

I would give the woman notice that if you don’t hear from her in the next two weeks you will regard the cat as abandoned and will be getting her registration changed to you.

smokeytoby · 01/08/2019 12:05

Pepper is beautiful!

Congratulations on your new pet, she is gorgeous and she looks very happy in her new home. I agree with PPs, it sounds like you needed her and she needed you, and you found each other at the right time in your lives (albeit in odd circumstances). x

hedwigge · 01/08/2019 12:30

She looks lovely. I’d be tempted to send a recorded letter stating that you will be keeping the cat in lieu of non-payment and get her chip details changed to you. The type of person who would dump a cat in that manner is also the type of person who would expect to uproot the poor thing years down the line if they decide on a whim they wanted her back.

Slippershoes · 01/08/2019 12:40

Well that cat definately looks at home doesn't she?
My sister acquired a cat in similar circumstances, he came from a family too so the whole lot of them didn't want him back Sad

poppet31 · 01/08/2019 12:53

I cannot believe someone would just abandon their pet like that. To be honest darkriver, even if she did come back for her, I'm not sure I could hand her over knowing her owner cared that little. You've done a lovely thing looking after her. I would send the woman a message on Facebook saying you've assumed she doesn't want the cat anyone and you are going to get the microchip changed. Give her a few days to respond.

Swipe left for the next trending thread