To not give him toast?

[Jellybeansincognito]

My 2.5 year olds eating habits are atrocious, he just seems to hate food, because of this I have to deal with his constant constipation (I have sachets to help with this, from the dr).

I feel like I’m at the end of my tether however, unless his meal consists of toast, pizza or pasta he just will not eat it. These issues have brought me to tears on several occasions because his constipation makes him scream in pain and what does come out is so acidic his bum bleeds. I’ve ever gone to the effort of making wholemeal pizza dough and hidden veg sauces.

I feel constantly stressed regards to his meals and I’ve had enough.
Today’s lunch was a sandwich, tomatoes, cucumber, grapes and a few orange segments of which were all squeezed to pieces and none of it was eaten.

It’s an hour later now and he’s whinging for toast, aibu saying no?

Anyone else been through this and can offer any advice?
No health professional seems concerned because his weight isn’t dropping.

Can you make dippy eggs and toast soldiers?

Of course say no to toast and let him wait for the next mealtime. Toddlers do not starve themselves to death.

Yeah! He’s gone for a nap now, but I can try when he wakes up.

My daughter was fussy, no where near this bad however, she’s 4 now and eats pretty much everything.

what does he have on his pasta? puree loads of veg into a sauce. Include stuff that makes you go.

And while he's screaming in pain on the loo can you tell him that food will help

He is only 2.5and you have given him things he doesn't like for lunch. It is hardly unexpected that he is now hungry. Just give him the toast and keep offering other things alongside the things he will eat. I know the constipation issue is difficult but he isn't old enough to relate the two things. Try and remain relaxed and almost unfussed by what he eats and see if he might start trying new things. My DD2 was horribly fussy when she was young but at the age of 21 she now eats almost anything. They do change eventually.

Make him wholemeal toast with smooth peanut butter. I’d go with his faddy eating for now as it will become a total battleground otherwise.
Continue to make homemade pizza with wholemeal flour, homemade tomato sauce, cut veggies up really small and hide them under the sauce and cheese. Literally tiny pieces of raw red onion.
Use wholewheat pasta.
Cut up bananas and small pieces of sweet fruit, strawberries and kiwi are both fantastic for constipation.
I forget what it’s called but there’s a fibre supplement that comes in powder form, add a teaspoon to all his drinks, you can buy it in the healthcare isle in supermarkets.
Lactulose is amazing stuff. You can buy it over the counter.
Baked beans and homemade wedges with the skin on. Peas and sweetcorn sneaked into pasta dishes.
Prunes liquidised and a teaspoon of flax seeds stirred into a yogurt.
DD suffered horrific constipation as a child, she was hospitalised a couple of times.

He isn't losing weight because he is eating food which is basically full of carbohydrates. (Sugar).

There isn't really any point in crying when he is in distress over his painful constipation. You need to dole out some tough love and get very creative.

What foods have you tried him on? Do you know any other mothers irl who you can chat to and see how they handle this? Lots of little ones have appalling and very limited diets at various stages.

If he ever has toast, don't toast white bread. Make sure he has wholemeal or granary as it is higher in fibre.

You need to not let him get to the stage where he is constipated. Give the sachets every day, increase them until he’s going for a poo daily then reduce as necessary. I have a child with chronic constipation and he gets one sachet a day to keep him regular and we increase as necessary, so some days he might get two if he hasn’t been. There’s no need for him to be passing bloody stools and you don’t want him to get a fear and hold on to it. If he’s constipated it can also affect his appetite. Keep him drinking too, as much fluid as possible. The sachets (I assume it’s movicol or similar) are the gold standard so you shouldn’t need anything else.

I would give the toast for now and add things as you can. He will pick up on your anxiety about it if you make it a thing so for now pick your battles. Obviously this is an easy thing to say!

Watching with interest as my 2.5 year old DS is the same. He will only eat toast, roast potatoes, cheese and tomato pizza, sweet potato fries, fruit and yoghurt. Nothing else! It's so frustrating so I feel your pain OP.

For the constipation, the GP recommended whizzing up a smoothie from fruits such as pears, apples, oranges, pineapples . . . all the fruits good for getting you moving. My DS will happily have these as he loves fruit so much. Would your DS have this do you think? I give them to him quite a bit and not had a problem with constipation since. I also was advised to put him on a multivitamin until his diet improves.

I've just been serving him what the rest of us are having for his meals and making sure something I know he'll eat is on his plate. Ie if we're having lasagne, he'll be having lasagne and toast. He usually just eats the bit he likes and leaves the rest. He knows he won't get anything else until his next meal or snack but it doesn't seem to bother him x

I'd say carry on as you are with getting as much wholemeal fibre in him and hide the veg in anything you can. Plenty of clear fluids as well.

Is it a texture thing? Food touching? Am sure you have ruled them out already but lots of children have issues with one or both.

Please try not to stress, although I know the constipation and fighting makes it hard to step away, it gets to be an obsession. My dh was a total nightmare as a child with regards to food and his parents turned it into a war at every meal time, something which still lingers now if he eats in their company - not great to be in your 30s and unable to eat without stress near your parents. He grew out of it eventually and eats pretty much everything now.

Maybe try one new food every week? Get him to choose something.

Dates are also good for constipation so you could try your son with date bars or you could try making bliss balls for him.

And while he's screaming in pain on the loo can you tell him that food will help

Nice. He's 2.

I've managd to convince mine that these are sweets and only available for a treat....www.sainsburys.co.uk/shop/gb/groceries/nakd-salted-caramel-fruit---nut-nibbles-40g-7745561-p?gclid=CjwKCAjw-ITqBRB7EiwAZ1c5U2xiTbHjkTiARvO2gWhDfySpuKwTQvL2iGd-qxXnd-J2nrWWtgOX9RoCAAMQAvD_BwE&storeId=10151&langId=44&krypto=PuyhTUT91IQxXugyOqRh51z1%2FBBI2Hocepg7MrXq%2Fb2Tw7q0KmG8egVuSyj5aBCLRsEyoOb3L1U2%2FBdlgUt7FipAyCkhELK8UHDTp0vTsgI887X%2F92S7Js3speUSB%2Bb8hhS1CNPGFZu%2Ft6IJf%2Be4vydU3u3MoA8TXSiw5BzJBEwOVHt8QfhUsWP1%2FkmNJgz5dQsF9wuPuLcTrO7TyqJSG6WLG%2FEojQODVFoRVuUIEWoFyDUNHLpfBQltQB5AXU56GdvAU71y1Vfu4opU4OVykhBoJeWue7%2BcDiLNgneg%2F90q4iEgaPp9g6PAuctdj2X%2F&ddkey=https%3Agb%2Fgroceries%2Fnakd-nibbles-salted-caramel-40g

www.sainsburys.co.uk/shop/gb/groceries/nakd-salted-caramel-fruit---nut-nibbles-40g-7745561-p?gclid=CjwKCAjw-ITqBRB7EiwAZ1c5U2xiTbHjkTiARvO2gWhDfySpuKwTQvL2iGd-qxXnd-J2nrWWtgOX9RoCAAMQAvD_BwE&storeId=10151&langId=44&krypto=PuyhTUT91IQxXugyOqRh51z1%2FBBI2Hocepg7MrXq%2Fb2Tw7q0KmG8egVuSyj5aBCLRsEyoOb3L1U2%2FBdlgUt7FipAyCkhELK8UHDTp0vTsgI887X%2F92S7Js3speUSB%2Bb8hhS1CNPGFZu%2Ft6IJf%2Be4vydU3u3MoA8TXSiw5BzJBEwOVHt8QfhUsWP1%2FkmNJgz5dQsF9wuPuLcTrO7TyqJSG6WLG%2FEojQODVFoRVuUIEWoFyDUNHLpfBQltQB5AXU56GdvAU71y1Vfu4opU4OVykhBoJeWue7%2BcDiLNgneg%2F90q4iEgaPp9g6PAuctdj2X%2F&ddkey=https%3Agb%2Fgroceries%2Fnakd-nibbles-salted-caramel-40g

My youngest is a very picky eater. Even now at 15.
At age 2 her diet was very limited. It was pizza, mac and cheese, pasta (no sauce), and chocolate. She refused all liquids except water. She hated vegetables and fruit.
She also had constipation but our Dr gave us suppositories...don’t think sachets were available then.
Anyway, after much tearing out of hair, wailing and gnashing of teeth we negotiated a way forward with her.

• she must absolutely promise to try anything new. But if she did not like it, we would not force her to eat it.
• we’d always make sure there was enough of what she does like so she would not go hungry.

So....we gradually started introducing different things. Gradually, we found things she did like amongst the many she hated. Taking the pressure off made her more willing to try stuff. We discovered she liked peas mixed in her mac and cheese. She tried carrots and said “they’re on thin ice. I don’t hate them and can eat a few now and then”. She tried chocolate soy milk and gave it thumbs up- that was a plus for a kid that refuses anything but water. I gave her raisins...another win and good for the constipation. But for every success there were what felt like 99 failures. Now at 15 she is still very very picky but she likes enough things in each food group to have good nutrition although it would be boring and repetitive to anyone else.

To follow from the smoothie suggestion above, you could freeze into lollies?

also can you start doing other tings regarding food.so baking,so he is trying nice foods but it is getting him enjoying food again and getting him tasting ifferent tastes.
also helping you cook.can he help you stir.can the "master" chef help see if a food needs more milk,salt,tomato etc.get him not seeing food as this battleground.dip the spoon in and ask him his opinion.
or what veg should mum have tonight.
encourage him to tyr a yummy sandwhich youve made but no pressure.
then if hes helped with a meal make yummy noises and praise his taste and chef skills.

Not really sure any toddler needs “tough love” I mean come on his a 2 year old child. Some of the advice on here on how to deal with little ones amazes me at times.

He isn’t losing weight so clearly his eating enough food, just not the right types hence the constipation. It’s still good however his weight isn’t dropping.

I’d give him toast to be honest, nothing wrong with wholemeal toast! Would he have baked beans or peanut butter on it?

Keep going with the hidden veg sauces for pizza. Would he also eat spag Bol with hidden veg sauce and wholemeal spaghetti?

Could a banana & strawberry smoothie/milkshake work?

Fruit purée and yoghurt home made ice lolly?

Keep offering oranges

Flap jacks with dates cut up really small in them?

Try to relax, it is honestly just a phase.

Don’t listen to people to make him wait until the next mean, as all your doing is making life hard for yourself and upsetting him over what a piece of toast it’s not worth it

And ffs no “tough love” for a 2 year old child

Say no, he’ll be fine. Like you said, his weight hasn’t dropped. This can only get more difficult as time goes on if you give in.

Does he drink fruit juice? I know it isn’t great for teeth, but orange juice can work for constipation. In this weather you could even freeze it into ice lollies. I think if food and mealtimes have become a battleground, you need to step back (hard as that is) and let him start enjoying his food again. Make sure each meal is mostly what he likes, with a little of what you would like him to eat. So his lunch could have been toast (which you know he’ll eat) with a small portion of fruit. Don’t make any comment on what he does or doesn’t eat, but praise him for something else (eg sitting nicely at the table).

He’s not got blood in his stool but he passes liquid so much without actually going fully to the toilet and makes him so sore his skin bleeds (I change him every time he’s gone to get rid of it and use cotton wool with water and yellow metanium)- on a bad day of this I can be changing every 10 minutes until he’s gone to the toilet properly. I give a sachet as soon as I notice he is becoming constipated and ensure he has 3-4 of them a day until he’s been to the toilet.

He has hidden veggie sauces, he drinks fruit juice, I’ve tried smoothies but he won’t drink them, he won’t eat smoothie ice lollies either. He was eating tomatoes and grapes but is even refusing those now, sandwiches are hit are miss, he doesn’t like peanut butter, I use wholemeal and wholewheat where I can.

I’ve tried flax seeds and also chia seeds- if I put stuff in his yoghurt he won’t eat it.

He even seemed to like sultanas last week but now refuses to eat them.

Thanks for the suggestion of the snacks from Sainsbury’s, I’ll add them to my next online shop.

He doesn’t know that I’m frustrated about his eating. I just take his plate away.

I too hope this passes soon, I’d love to say it’s a phase but he’s been a nightmare since the beginning of weaning.

I have wondered if it’s sensory because if he eats something like mash potato it makes him gag.

I’m only frustrated because it feels like I can’t do much more for him and it is overtaking my life a little bit with stress and concern.
I’ve waisted far too much money and time making food, clearing up the mess after no success, it’s an absolute nightmare.

I’d just give him the toast. He’s too young to understand that his hunger is a consequence of his actions at lunchtime.

Are you sure the constipation is just diet related? That seems like a really quite violent reaction to a diet that, although not ‘normal’ as such, is not uncommon amongst toddlers. Can you get him checked for other things, like gluten intolerance?

My 2yo is very fussy atm too, it’s a pain but I just ignore it mostly.

At his age I don’t think he can make the connection between food and painful poo, he just doesn’t like what he doesn’t like.

I would give him the toast and try and get as much fresh juice down him if that helps at all.

Tough one, I sympathise

What I missed is that I’d prefer a toddler to be fed than hungry.