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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

'Detained' at petrol station for not having my bank card

491 replies

Willowcat77 · 31/07/2019 07:39

Yesterday I stopped at my local village petrol station to refuel. I was on my way to pick up my DS for an important hospital appointment. I am a regular customer as it is the only petrol station/shop in the area and always get my car MOT'd there. My DP has been a customer/friend of the owners for over 20 years.

I went to the counter to pay but then realised that I'd left my bank card at home. The shop assistants knew me by sight so I said I'm really sorry but I'll need to go home to get my card, my house is only 5 minutes down the road. The assistant told me no, I would have to phone someone to pay for me and that I was forbidden to leave the premises!

I was very taken aback, but I phoned my DP. Unfortunately he wasn't answering his phone so I had to leave a voicemail. There was nobody else I could phone in the area. I was very worried about missing the hospital appointment, so I tried to reason with the shop assistants. I explained the situation and offered to leave my phone and £20 cash as security whilst I fetched my card. My petrol bill was £39. They knew I was local and my DP and I have spent 1000s of pounds there over the years.

They refused, saying if necessary I would have to stay there all day until my DP came to pay for me. They said this was "the rule". I wanted to speak to the owner but he wasn't in. I have ASD and am easily panicked. I was getting later and later for the hospital appointment and could feel I was having a proper ASD meltdown. I was getting so distressed I couldn't even redial my DPs number any more and had to ask them to do it. Eventually, after about 20 minutes, DP unexpectedly arrived and paid for me. I still feel very upset and that I can't ever go there again out of embarrassment.

My DP has since found out they did something similar to an older lady recently who was also local and a regular customer.

Aibu to feel I was treated badly and to make a complaint to the owner today? What were my rights in this situation? Could I have left to get the money?

OP posts:
EdtheBear · 31/07/2019 09:56

The lack of police support is probably why Sainsbury's form is an agreement for them to hand it to Debt Collectors!

Idontwanttotalk · 31/07/2019 09:58

Wow. I'm surprised so many people have forgotten their card/mo way and had to fill in a NMtP form.

No wonder petrol stations came up with the form idea. It is clearly needed.

probstimeforanewname · 31/07/2019 09:58

A lot of petrol stations are no longer allowing you to “fill in a form”, because they’ve been burnt this way too many times

So what are they doing instead? Manhandling you to the ground, tying you up and waiting for the police not to come?

KnifeAngel · 31/07/2019 09:58

The police take bilking very seriously. My Dad got some petrol and paid in cash. Luckily a colleague was in the shop at the time. It appears another customer drove off without paying. My Dad had the police at the door at 6am the next morning. He was interviewed three times and the colleague was also interviewed. They eventually backed down. The workers have to pay if someone drives off.

They had no idea if you would return and probably have it happen all the time.

bernietaupinspen · 31/07/2019 09:59

I have done it in our local esso. They took my details and said if I didn't return by the end of they day they would report to police. I was back within the hour to pay!

I have to say in the situation described in the OP I would have simply walked out and gone to get the money.

Booboo66 · 31/07/2019 09:59

I'd have driven home to get my card regardless, if they did call the police (which I'm sure they wouldn't unless you didn't return) you'd have been back and paid before they'd even finished the call. I understand your ASD perhaps made that harder for you so I don't think YABU on that front either. Did you make the appointment? Definitely complain to the owner, and point out she had no legal right to 'detain' you. Very poor behaviour especially given the circumstances that you are well known to them all.

slashlover · 31/07/2019 10:01

To everyone saying OP is a regular, do you know how many people that petrol station probably sees in a week? I have people who come up to me and try to start conversations and I have no idea who they are, apparently they're a regular customer. I have people who come in and say things like "Do you remember me from last week?, no I don't!

snitzelvoncrumb · 31/07/2019 10:01

Going by Google they can detain you under citizens arrest, they can lock you in, or physically restrain you until the police arrive. It would be your lucky day if they forcibly made you stay, as you would have hit the jackpot in a lawsuit, they are liable if they use unnecessary force.
Personally I would have just walked out and gone straight back to pay.

JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 31/07/2019 10:01

The workers have to pay if someone drives off.

No they don’t. That’s not legal.

Booboo66 · 31/07/2019 10:01

*Well they can't lawfully detain you so you'd have been within your rights to simply leave.

@lastqueenofscotland I didn't know that, do you know under which Act?*

@DramaRamaLlama are you able to show which act DOES allow petrol station staff to detain the general public?

gonewiththepotter · 31/07/2019 10:03

OP I would be BOYCOTTING this petrol station and garage moving forward.

Small local business are never the cheapest but you support them on the basis of rapport/relationship. If you don’t have that then use cheaper larger ones In your local town/city x

Bloke23 · 31/07/2019 10:05

I was rushing one morning, left my bank at home, filled up at my local BP garage, I'm a regular there so they just said go home and come back and pay, which I did straight away

Boom25 · 31/07/2019 10:05

The workers have to pay if someone drives off.

Think that statement through. Do you really think Esso/Shell/Total/Tesco/Sainsbury's/Morrisons and other massive multinational companies have/could have that in their employment contracts?

RaggeddeeAnn · 31/07/2019 10:06

YABU.
Filling up your car and then leaving without paying is theft- a criminal offence as soon as you leave the premises with the petrol. Your only other option was to leave the petrol on the premises (in your car) walk home and get your card. They really did not have a choice in this. It’s not an easy situation to be in, but it was merely the consequences of your forgetting your bank card. I had a similar situation when my purse was stolen...with my car keys and cards. I had left it in the trolley for a few seconds to put towels back on a shelf that my toddler had pulled down into a heap on the floor. I straightened up to see my purse had been lifted. I was stranded with two toddlers miles from anywhere. It’s stressful and embarrassing. I fekt stupid for setting down my purse. But mistakes happen...everyone does them.

pancaketits · 31/07/2019 10:06

I'm sorry but the station staff did the right thing. Would you expect to walk into any other shop, choose something and when you don't have the means to pay leave with it?

If this happens in the future, there's no reason why you can't call someone to pay over the phone for you. You don't have to have someone physically arrive.

Booboo66 · 31/07/2019 10:10

And to whoever said it's a criminal offence to fill up a car without the means to pay, of course that's to knowingly do so, and to actually not have the means to pay. OP had the means to pay, it was just as her house 5 minutes drive away and it was unintentional. I very much doubt she's about to get dragged down the station for her 'offence' of filling up her car whilst her card was at home 🙄

StreetwiseHercules · 31/07/2019 10:11

“ If you intentionally fill up your car when you know you can’t pay and subsequently leave without paying, that is classed as ‘making off without paying’ and is illegal. I can see what the PP means.”

Eh?!? That is entirely different from what the previous poster said.

shieldmaidenofrohan · 31/07/2019 10:16

Fuelling your car without checking you have a means to pay before hand is a criminal offence

It isn't. You are thinking of making off without payment, an offence under the theft act 78. This, however, requires the element of dishonestly - for the offence to be complete the person would have to fill up intending to never pay for the fuel.
Mrs Bloggs genuinely filling up her car with every intention of paying then realises she doesn't have the purse in not MOWP

DarkAtEndOfTunnel · 31/07/2019 10:16

The workers have to pay if someone drives off.

No they don’t. That’s not legal.

What you have to realise is that law only matters if it is enforced. I used to work in retail, and workers having to pay when cheques they'd accepted bounced was a reality. It sucks. Unfortunately people in these kind of low-paid roles do not have the money to take employers to court. If they tried they would lose their jobs. And again, when that happens they can't afford to sue for dismissal, and anyway, that doesn't matter when you don't have a job with which to earn a living, or any prospect of one because you need a reference.

This is normal life, outside of the middle class arena. Britain is such a great country isn't it.

daphine2004 · 31/07/2019 10:17

I haven’t read the whole thread, but of not hasn’t been mentioned already, it’s best to use Apple Pay or similar for Android. You generally always have your phone with you and with Apple pay the contactless limit is higher.

I rarely take my purse out now as I just use my phone.

YesQueen · 31/07/2019 10:20

I forgot my card at my local garage, they said no worries and did I want my usual drink and cigs too Grin
I paid when I next went in

ImMeantToBeWorking · 31/07/2019 10:21

OP, I hope your OK and you made the appointment. That is a horrific way to treat people, and I am pretty sure that they cannot detain you like that. It happened to be before and I filled in a form, showed my drivers licence and they had my reg for if I did not come back It happens ALL THE TIME and if you forget to pay you get a call from the Guards to remind you, and then if you don't pay they will take it further.

I would complain to the owner, and take my business elsewhere.

dadshere · 31/07/2019 10:21

Never use that garage again. Make sure you tell all of your friends, and ask them to do likewise.

KnifeAngel · 31/07/2019 10:22

The workers did have to pay in this petrol station. It was confirmed by the police to us. It was an independent one. They took my Dad's registration but unluckily for them he could prove he had paid.

ChicCroissant · 31/07/2019 10:22

My nearest petrol station (a supermarket one) has signs on every pump pointing out that Apple Pay permits £30.