To be annoyed at being everyone's pregnant taxi service?

[MummyG31]

So since becoming pregnant I seem to have become everyone's taxi. I don't mind being designated driver when I'm going somewhere too but my family etc (who live nearby to me and husband) are constantly calling me and asking me for lifts. If I'm not doing anything else I have said yes but it's getting on my nerves now. When I try to decline I get told things like "You're not asked for much" and "You've got to get used to driving around a lot when baby comes". They've even started offering my services to outside parties!!!
One thing I feel bad about being annoyed over is driving to pick my grandparents up and then dropping them off later so my Nan can have a drink. She deserves it because she's a saint but I wonder why the rest of my family can't do this every now and again?! Anyway... Is this just my lot now that I'm pregnant and I've got to get over it or am I right to start digging my heels in?

Tell them no, cheeky sods! Surely they don’t all want to drink all the time anyway?

I'm pregnant and I'm not a taxi service at all. If anything it's the other way around, my mum tends to pick me up because I'm not so comfy driving due to PGP.

Just say no.
Stop being a martyr.

@53rdWay ah this probably isn't normal but my family are generally always drinking when gathering together. I don't understand why every now and again one of them can't delay a glass of wine to do the taxi run though or, I don't know, order a taxi like everyone else? I'm glad you agree it's cheeky!

@smartcarnotsosmartdriver yes!! I am such a nervous driver and they know this!!!

@7yo7yo you are totally right. I will get a mouthful but I've had enough of it!

Yes its cheeky, they aren't scared to tell you what they think so tell them what you think back or they will stomp all over you like a doormat.

They are taking advantage of you. How did they manage to get around before? You need to stick up for yourself and say no.

Do you get money for petrol?

Just tell them no. Nobody needs to drink and i wouldn’t be encourging drinking by being a taxi service.

Just tell them no end off if they don’t like it that’s there problem not yours.

Yanbu

You shouldn't have to get used to driving and being told they dont ask for much is ridiculous.

Its rude for them to ask.

Start saying no, blame being tired, anything but stop. They May be your family but they are only thinking of themselves.

If you plan to go out drinking you should factor in the cost of travel home

Just say no!

Jeez. Do they have to drink all the time?

This is really bizarre. Dh and I are both teetotal but never get asked to drive other people around except for the occasional drop someone at a mainline station to avoid parking charges on a weekend away or similar. This is always reciprocated.

Your family must drink far more than normal.

@buttertoasty no money for petrol! I suppose the idea is that it all comes around but no one has driven me anywhere as of yet 😂

I was happy to be the taxi when pregnant but I wouldn’t have liked being called for lifts all the time! Cheeky sods!

I mean as designated driver to something I was attending.

Thanks everyone, I'm feeling very empowered now. Next time they ask I'm going to make up an excuse. It's good to get your outside perspectives because obviously my family think I am unreasonable and my friends always side with me either way!!

@PurpleFlower1983 Absolutely agree! I am more than happy to drive everyone to stuff I'm already attending! The funniest is when I hear them say "oh that's alright, blah blah will drive me" when they haven't even asked 🤣

I had very sicky pregnancies so wasn’t able to drive much myself. I think you could use several excuses - the smell of alcohol makes you want to vomit - you feel queasy when driving (I had sickness similar to motion sickness) - you have twinges in your hips and don’t want to make them worse by unnecessary driving (google SPD) or you are getting very tired when concentrating on something.
Good luck, but just because you are pregnant does not mean you become a taxi service.

Don't make up an excuse just say no!

Gosh, you are their doormat. Be more assertive and just say no.

@Pinktinker Yeah I do feel like a bit of a doormat actually - will put a stop to that now!

They sound obsessed with ensuring the maximum number of people can drink alcohol at any given occasions.

You're pregnant. They need to stop taking advantage of you (it would be cheeky even if you weren't pregnant).

Presumably this is to facilitate their evenings drinking. So you are expected to wait around and pick them up when the pubs close etc.

The more you say yes and comply, the more they will see it as their right, the harder it will be to stop. This is the thin end of the wedge and their demands will increase as offering your services to outside parties ( for which they get the thanks and credit!!!) demonstrates. What a blooming cheek. Flamingo Queen had some good suggestions!
Stamp this out right away they will see you as their gofer as using the excuse that you are on maternity leave or pregnant so you can't drink works so well. They will try to make you feel bad - but they are making you feel bad already. They will try to tell you that you are selfish - this is to disguise their own selfishness. Your lovely Gran is different and you can tell her privately.
They have got used to imposing on you and I suspect that this is not the only area when they do this. You have a baby coming and your health and your baby's health is your 1st priority.. you will have them making requests that discount the baby's needs so you need to be ready to stand your ground.
What's the worst that can happen? A bit of the cold shoulder.. good..if it means they back off a bit. They will have to find someone else to run around after them.. or - here's a thought.. one of them can stay sober and take it in turns to the be the Designated. Sounds like it wouldn't do them any harm at all.

It sounds like they have an answer for every time you politely try to decline without offending them. Let them be offended! They are using that as a way to get you to do what they want. have some prepared phrases like I am not a taxi. I am not an Uber. or some of the Mumsnet favourites. No..(a complete sentance etc) or Sorry that doesn't work for me. Or let me think about that, I need to check.. and then text no. Sorry I can't do that. Get your OH on board and he has to be prepared to them very firmly Mummy G cannot go out late Ubering you.. she needs to rest and look after her blood pressure.

To harden your resolve. Think about the last 10 trips you did, there and back. And the times. How much would they have had to pay you if you were an Uber! I bet it adds up!! Get an Uber quote for these, Screenshot it and send them the lot. In fact, get an Uber app and send them the link. If they ask again, get them an Uber Quote and send it to them. Congrats on your baby and wishing you all the best

ha.. sorry that last para needed editing, but you get the gist. These are not simple requests. They all add up, in time and effort and money and in breaking into your evening's rest.

I'd claim to be sick all the time, and glare. I wouldn't give a shit if they knew I was lying right to their faces.