To be massively hurt

[looondonn]

Good friend from 15 years plus told me the other day how fat I have become

She didn't sugar coat it

Just was so blunt
'Didn't you realise'
How did this happen blah blah

How would you guys react?
I'm peeved with her

Had baby over a year ago and got out of massively abisivie relationship
Part time cater for ill relative and also got PTSD to throw in the mix

Why be so cruel ??

Some of you may not agree but personally I would never ever be so blunt EVER :(

[looondonn]

Thank you to the kind posters

Will be fine

Blocking all the Sh** out will make a difference

I don't need someone to tell me I have a problem I binge ate for months to deal with trauma that I could not talk about with others due to being utterly mortified at my situation

Small number of decent friends is plenty for me

Good night all 😘😘😘

[ReanimatedSGB]

One of those things that stupid people don't understand - fat people haven't not noticed that they are fat. They don't need telling that they are fat.
Anyone who comments on anyone else's body shape or size without being asked to do so is a bellend.
(oh and if you're going to get all waa, waa, waa, but your HEALTH then fuck off, You weren't asked for your unimportant opinion.)

[looondonn]

And sheeeesh some of the bitchy remarks here miaaaaaaaw

My god!!

😘😘😘😘😘🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[BlackCatSleeping]

Sometimes in life you have a lot going on and do what you need to do just to get by. Don't let people like this get you down.

You can lose the weight but she'll still be a bitch.

Take care of yourself and well done for getting out of an abusive relationship.

[FieryBiscuits14]

Sounds like she's after your ex if she only got her nasty pants on after siding with him. I'd say the fuckers are welcome to each other.

[looondonn]

Hehe yesss fierybiscuits

Wouldn't be surprised.

Match made in hell

[DuckbilledSplatterPuff]

You have a 7 week old baby, caring for a relative and just left an abusive relationship and she spoke to you like that? She is fat shaming and enjoying it. There are ways to be kind and supportive if you are concerned about a friend, and none of her commments are that.
I think you were in two abusive relationships and your "friend" was one of them. She's had you running around after her looking after her pet for free, planning treats for her all summer? and then turns round and has a go at you about hoovering the car? This is first rate CF behaviour. and it needs to stop now. Even if you miraculously lost the weight immediately - I think this kind of person would still have a put down ready. I think because you were getting such a hard time from the first abusive relationship, it made it much harder see how abusive this friendship was. As for sympathising with your ex and the racist comments..speechless.
Losing weight is not easy, if it was it wouldn't be massive money making industry. It takes a bit of planning and sticking at it over a period of time and being concerned, as you have a new baby, with eating in a healthy way, not being bullied into crash diets that are rarely successful. As a previous poster said, you are doing really well coping with all the difficult things you have been through. A lot of diets and weightloss programmes talk about finding support and trying to rebuild your self esteem. This "friend" is no part of anything remotely supportive and you should spend time with people who are kind to you, and also be kind to yourself, enjoy your new baby and tackle all these issues one resolute step at a time. I wish you all the very best

[Sorchajanebright]

just jkkk

[Sorchajanebright]

Ahh, so sorry. Didn't mean to post that gobbledegook message! Was a complete mistake that I posted anything at all! Was a butt post!! 😩
Best of luck for ditching this awful 'friend' and for your journey ahead.

[Topttumps]

Op she isn’t a good friend. She is a nasty bitch and you deserve better. Good luck moving forward without her.

[looondonn]

Thanks guys

This site helped me when I was trying to flee from bas---- ex

Always get advice on here

I do not. Now why I stood there and took it from her

Anyway - lesson learned
Keep my distance for good

[zzzzzzzz12345]

Op this person is no friend. Bin her off completely. She’s a horrible person who needs to put others down. You don’t need people like that in your life.

[LifeImplosionImminent]

Why are people saying it might have been out of concern? If it was concern, surely the "friend" nasty bitch would have been more gentle and tactful. And not made racist comments about OP's child or her granny knickers (I love my granny knickers)

[gonewiththepotter]

Sorry OP but I’m kind of with your DFriend (although yes she could have been kinder about it)

Without intending to glaze over the hardships/misfortunes you’ve faced, as somebody who used to wear a size 20 I know that there will ALWAYS be an excuse.

I was sexually assaulted - there was a court case...why I piled on weight was justified but I didn’t lose it and a year later I still hadn’t lost it and there were STILL good reasons.

Nature doesn’t care if you have good reasons - prolonged periods of severe obesity won’t damage your health less or put you in less danger because you feel justified.

When a friend was blunt with me I felt like you do and was outraged...but it was the wake up call I needed and I’ve worn a size 10 for the last 5 years!

[StaplesCorner]

Sorry OP but I’m kind of with your DFriend - what, the dear friend that made racist comments? That one?

[gonewiththepotter]

@Staples

😦 Racist comments?? Nope did not see that! I’ve been having issues with full threads not loading on my phone. Apologies I was taking about the OP!

[StaplesCorner]

I did wonder! no worries, its one of those where you need to read all OP's posts.

[looondonn]

Yup indeed

Well her nastiness did work and I have either swam or been to gym in past few days

However

Fck the nastiness

I have Been a good friend
Favours here and there for well over a decade
Happy to house sit take her beautiful dog with me anytime it was necessary

And got what in return
Not even a thank you

Told off for the dogs hairs in her car fck off

Told I look like my babies nanny??
Sympathise with a man who not only abused me but asulted my daughter when she was only weeks old

Keeping clear of her

This is not a true friend

Funny since I fled the ex I have lost quite a few friends

[Ozziewozzie]

I really don’t think she’s worried about you at all. I think she’s resrntingbyou and expressing it by being a cow.
My god, I’d much rather be large than be a bitch.

I had the reverse but it equally upset me. I’d list loads of weight after a horrendous miscarriage. I lost so much blood and almost died of cardiac arrest. The stress caused me to lose my appetite for a while.
Whilst in a local shop, the shop owner told me how awful I looked, far too thin, and I need to put weight on immediately. i Explained I’d recently been ill, but she kept harping on in front of other customers.
What possesses some people?

[looondonn]

My sister can also be blunt
However

Her approach was ' let's give slimming world a try'

Ohh instead of a takeaway I don't mind cooking


NO DEREGATORY REMARKS
NO PUT DOWNS
NO RIDICULE

Friend must feel bad she is now texting nice texts 🤣🤣🤣

I got her baby girls some gifts - she complained that a) they were too big and b) the bag I put them in was too bulky 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻

[looondonn]

So sorry to hear this Ozziewozzie

❤️❤️

[RavenLG]

its one of those where you need to read all OP's posts
That would be all posts. Threads move on after almost 100 posts, if you're too lazy to read the whole thread before sticking an oar in, don't post.

[looondonn]

Thanks all

Great response to this
Let's see if she remains a 'good friend'

Lots of texts from her since the barrage of insults 😡😡