Family think I'm bad for leaving child at school 10mins before door opens

[pointbla]

I take my year 4 child early 10 mins before the school doors open and leave him there. I have another child to take to another school. He's 9 , I see no problem with it , other children are there too. Also, I don't regularly do that just occasionally.
My family seem to think this is very bad and I am putting my child at risk as the kids mess about. AIBU?

At 9 my ds would leave the house at 20 to 9 to walk to school himself, it's inky a 10 min walk so he would have been kicking about the playground for about 10 mins. By year 4 kids can arrive and leave our school without an adult there to drop off or pick up, there is very rarely a parent in the playground waiting for a child that age to go in the door. It's absolutely fine.

YANBU if the school are aware and ok with it.

Irresponsible how though @herculepoirot2 ?

I disagree that it's irresponsible to let a 9 year old spend ten minutes with his pals without having an adult directly staring at him the entire time.

herculepoirot2

If you saw an elderly person fall and hurt themselves, would you walk past and ignore them because they're not your responsibility? Probably not.

Nobody is asking teachers to watch or hover, but yes I would assume that they would call an ambulance if an accident occurred because that is what everyone in the real word does if another person gets injured, even a complete stranger.

Just like if I collapse on the street I would hope that a stranger would help me.

you don't live in London, do you!

Different countries, different rules.
Some countries do not allowed parents to go past the school gates.
Here, with our ridiculous "when there's a blame, there's a claim" attitude, schools have to make it clear they are not responsible out of of school hours, even if the playground is opened.

Without knowing much of the OP's situation, it's not really possible to judge if BU or not.

AudacityOfHope

So do I. That’s not what I’m saying. Like I have already said, if my 9 year old plays out in the street without me, I am still his responsible adult, should anything happen. He’ll have instructions to come home, or tell someone else where he lives, and I will come and get him.

That’s not the case here. The OP seems to be expecting the school to assume responsibility for her child, as she isn’t answering the question of who is actually responsible for him in that time.

Oh, another post got there first:

So, Herculepoirot2 and RussellBlue: if you were to fall over in the street and injure yourself, should I not bother to help you on the grounds that I have not officially assumed responsibility for you so I'm not obliged to do anything?

I knew as soon as you said Year 4, people would just assume you meant a 4 yo

Yes cause not everyone on Mumsnet is British[hmmm]

It would make more sense to use the age of the child.

Drogosnextwife

That doesn’t make them my responsibility. If it’s fine not to supervise our children just because some kind person will probably step in to sort out any problems, that’s news to me. What if they don’t? Whose responsibility is the child?

Still no explanation as to what the comment meant that the unattended kids end up in the sickbay

If you saw an elderly person fall and hurt themselves, would you walk past and ignore them because they're not your responsibility? Probably not.

This being mumsnet someone will probably be along to say that it would be a gross invasion of the elderly person's privacy to go and help

Many parents at our juniors do this. There are loads of unattended kids waiting in the car park area but unable to get in to the grounds until someone opens the gate through. People drive in, drop off and leave. Also done by many yr3 parents. I personally don’t drop and run as my kid would go home

So, Herculepoirot2 and RussellBlue: if you were to fall over in the street and injure yourself, should I not bother to help you on the grounds that I have not officially assumed responsibility for you so I'm not obliged to do anything?

You are entirely misunderstanding my point. Yes, I would hope someone would help me. But I am not going to leave my child to this vague hope that someone will help them.

The OP isn’t doing so either. She is strategically leaving her son in a place she knows to be perfectly safe, because there are adults who have to help him if something happens. It isn’t dangerous. It’s cheeky.

I wouldn't allow my kids to play in the street either, they're not feral!

Good God playing in the street isnt feral its..err kids playing with friends. Being kids!
You would have the vapours if you moved round here, kids all outside all summer, off on bikes, making dens, climbing trees quick call SS!

You're weirdly obsessed by the notion of responsibility @herculepoirot2

Heads at our school if you left your kid 10 minutes before the school opened they would be out on the street, not in the playground. The OP hasn’t said she’s leaving him in the playground.

If it’s only every so often then she can book him into breakfast club on those occasions. In our school that would mean he’d be in the playground, not out on the street.

Because the OP hasn’t bothered to come back and clarify anything we don’t actually know what the set up is. Could be fine, might not be.

Worra if this kid is left out on the street the school may have no idea about it. Why would they?

AudacityOfHope

Weirdly obsessed. 😂😂😂 I’ve heard it all, now.

To be fair you do keep banging on about it!

Year 4 child
Or
4 year old child

you could have made that a bit clearer😂 though you left a 4 yo standing there by itself

A 9 yo is fine i guess😄

Because the OP hasn’t bothered to come back and clarify anything we don’t actually know what the set up is. Could be fine, might not be.

She has been back though and clarified that as I and others suspected he is not being left on the street outside the school he is just outside his classroom.

@herculepoirot2 where do you draw the line? Do you follow your 13 year old around in case they fall over, because god forbid another human being helps them? When your 17 year old learns to drive, do you drive behind them in case they crash, because no one else is responsible for them so who would phone the fire brigade to cut them out of the car? And then they turn 18 and the whole world ignores them because they are no longer anyone’s responsibility? People are generally nice and will help, I see it as being a part of a community that I will help others and they will help me. It’s age appropriate risks, something can always go wrong and again, I will always hope that someone will help. A 9 year old alone for 10 minutes is an age appropriate risk and if in unlikely situation something did go wrong, yes I would EXPECT someone to help, as part of their responsibility of being a decent human and member of society

Willow2017
you let your kids building dens and climbing trees in the street? Really?

Nobody is asking the teachers to be responsible. Our primary the teachers were often not even there till 5 mins before bell! The playground supervisor was there from 8.30 bell went at 8.45. Plenty kids were there before that nobody expected anyone to supervise older kids ffs!

I wouldn't allow my kids to play in the street either, they're not feral!
Mine are not feral either.Just normal kids playing out with their friends.