AIBU to think you need money to be an ethical rainbow mum?

[RhubarbJuice]

So I go to a baby group, and there's a group of mums there, all very nice, but all quite similar in that they dress their children in organic clothes, the mums themselves often match in the adult versions, they have special reusable lunch boxes and coffee cups and all sorts. They are all very zero waste and anti plastic, which I agree with, we should all do our bit. One of them recommended these hair conditioning cubes which are zero plastic and good for your hair. I went online to look, the guts of £12 they cost! I have very thick hair so lucky to get a few weeks out of them

It's the same with the toys, they're very into their wooden toys, and as the babies were approaching their first birthdays, the conversation came up, and they're all spending hundreds on ethically made blocks and wooden rainbows. They worship this rainbow. One of them brought one to the group, and all the babies did love it.

AIBU to feel it's a shame its so expensive to do this kind of thing? I'd love to be able to afford all this stuff and go organic and plastic free, but it would cost me a fortune. Guess I'll have to stick with tupperware and second hand clothes for my DC!

I do draw the line at some of the clothes though, one mum was in a matching rainbow mushroom dress as her daughter.

Ask yourself the question in regard to all this: will my baby remember any of this? Or be influenced by it? And the answer is: probably not. So save the effort for the time when life opinions are actually created.

you can't consume your way out of overconsumption (which is what most of our environmental crisis is).
Totally agree with this.

Water off a duck’s crack. About reusable lunch boxes. I am bad. I collect those plastic takeaway containers, and give my kids food in them. I then tell them to throw them away instead of bringing them home as otherwise they malinger in school bags with slimy fruit in them. Yuck. So you can all feel greener than me

you can't consume your way out of overconsumption
So so true the mantra is reuse, recycle, reduce...
They are the equivalent of champagne socialist types, all talk and no trousers

Yep it costs a fortune to be green.
It might save money in the long run, but to buy your reusables costs a fortune. It’s also the shit factor, some stuff is a bit shit. So if you struggle to afford it and it’s crap your doubly stuffed.

But no yanbu it costs a fortune.

I didn't realise I was a type, I couldn't abide baby groups and most of my friends don't have children so can't compare. We buy a few wooden toys rather than mounds of plastic, we also have chillys water bottles, mine was a gift and I bought DH one as he loved mine. £20 outlay refilled with tap water, so pays for itself very quickly. I buy fruugi , Boden etc but in the sales and I second h and m conscious for organic clothing, really reasonable. I also make baby food rather than but it, and breast feed, these are actually cheaper options. I don't judge people who don't make the choices I do and didn't realise I was being judged for the ones I have made.

Usually it is better to buy something second hand rather than buy the new eco alternative.

So with clothes, buy second hand rather than new expensive organic scandi clothes, which whilst beautiful used a shit-load of water to grow the cotton.

If I am buying new I buy the more eco version, but wherever possible I buy second hand, or better still don't buy it. For example for a while I stopped drinking takeaway coffee to avoid throwing disposable cups away. Really we don't need to drink coffee on the go. Then I got pregnant and bought a keep cup to keep me awake :)

If you are inclined, you can find Facebook selling groups for scandi clothes, Grimms toys etc, and then resell the stuff afterwards.

I'm a bit eco-lite I guess. We mainly have handmedowns for the kids- but the frugi stuff is often on its 5th or 6th child so does last much better than cheap supermarket stuff which is usually ruined before it's on kid number 2. If we do have to buy new it's sales or H&M conscious.

We don't buy plastic tat for the children - although I am on the lookout for some used lego.

There is definitely a big 'ecolifestyle' brand culture to sell stuff. I liked this blog www.freeourkids.co.uk/ where she tried to buy nothing new for her toddler for a year. That's the most ethical thing you can do.

Most of the Instagram eco stuff requires either a lot of cash or a lot of time.

Buying second-hand plastic toys is better for the environment than creating more demand for new wooden ones. Re-using anything is better for the environment than creating a new one - clothes, books, toys, crockery.

The Ebay version won't be the same, probably won't even be CE tested

Just looked at them now, they are Grimm's. Ebay are shit hot on counterfeit goods so you can be reasonably confident they are the real deal. Of course, 'I got it cheap off Ebay' doesn't sound half as hipster as 'It was from Olaf and Ulrika's Sustainable Company, it was very expensive but it will last' does it...

OP, just inwardly laugh at them. Repair and reuse is the most sustainable approach of all and if you buy from the CS, someone needy will benefit. What's not to like? Of course, you wouldn't want to perpetuate consumerism anyway, would you

I still think the best reusable wipe was invented many years ago - it's called a flannel

Hell yes! I can also remember my own 'reusable' lunchbox and flask from primary school. These things are not new!

It’s a big picture thing that’s missed sometimes.
Some of the salad wrapped in plastic extends shelf life so less is wasted, less is produced etc.
Buying organic cotton is still consuming a lot of energy being produced.
The batteries on electric cars contain rare resources.
It goes on and on.

I’d love to use glass milk bottles but it works out so much more expensive

Most of these wooden Mamas on Insta are consuming as much if not more than the average person - most of it is brown or sludgey/mossy looking so it has a sheen of worthiness...but if you look their kids have so much stuff, much of which they are given so it’s new

I’ve always used wooden toys with all of my DC as babies/toddlers. They eventually discovered knex and Lego so my lovely wooden toy collection was cast aside but it was passed down to the next child and still great condition. Very durable compared to plastic tat, I hate plastic toys with a passion.

Anyway, I agree to a point. Eco fashion is expensive as hell. I tend to buy it all second hand because babies and children aren’t in clothes for very long anyway. I’d rather buy second hand but good brands that are durable than buy new primark/supermarket shit that doesn’t last.

I must admit, I didn't realise people bought these clothes and toys because they are more environmentally friendly. I just like the style of them, and love the patterns and bright colours. Plus they seem to last so much longer. I do buy in the sale though, so not much more expensive than most high street shops. They wash well too, so you can get away with less clothes.

I buy new plastics toys, my six year old would not appreciate something wooden. Shampoo blocks really irritate my scalp.

I wouldn't even know where to look for frugi clothes, we buy supermarket brands.

I do try to buy larger containers of food and household products to reduce plastic. I avoid over packaged fruit and veg.

I don't drive, which I think is some sort of MN sin but probably helps a little.

I do hate that somehow being environmental friendly has become "womens work" and the responsibility of those run the household. Now it is something that people can use to judge other families and their lifestyles.

What we do makes very little difference compared to the decision makers across industry and government.

I hate plastic toys with a passion.

Really? You hate Lego, Duplo, Playmobile?

I find them to be the best toys out there.

Don’t get me started on the fucking rainbows. They’re worshipped on here too.

If you want wooden toys, Lidl do a brilliant cheap range. I’ve found nice stuff in Tesco too.

But I agree you can’t consume your way out of over consumption.

These women don’t really care about the environment, they’re just jumping on the latest trendy bandwagon.

Some people are walking adverts for eco-ethical consumerism OP.

Their approach is all about image/trend and less about reduce/reuse/recycle.

Ebay are shit hot on counterfeit goods so you can be reasonably confident they are the real deal

I wouldn't be so sure about that. The words compatible, replica and custom are used an awful lot on Ebay. Whilst they don't outright say counterfeit, Ebay happily sell a lot of toys that are definitely cheap knock off versions of well known products.

Being on a budget I think has actually helped me waste less.

I don’t buy tons of clothes or toys, just what is needed.
We go to some houses where there are piles and piles of toys and the children hardly touch them

Some will be bought second hand, some are eco brands but not the expensive grimms ones.
There are eco brands you can sometimes buy very cheaply in tk max like green toys.

You have to have your life fairly in order to worry about this stuff, so it does require enough money that you aren't living a hand to mouth existence.

It doesnt have to cost that much. We used reusable nappies and wipes. Reusable nappies were second hand and wipes cost about £15 and lasted years whereas 15 packs of disposable wipes only last a few months with a little baby. The main reason for us was cost - it worked out cheaper in the long run - but the environmental impact was also a bonus. Of course you have to have enough for the initial outlay.

I buy frugi clothes because I think they're cute and good quality. I've never paid full price - always bought in sales or second hand. The resale value is excellent and in some cases I made a profit!

I do however think wooden toys are overpriced in many places. we bought wooden toys in aldi (certified sustainable) so DDs kitchen was £30 instead of £100+ for a branded one.

I used to like the idea of wooden toys.
Right up to the moment ds2 picked up his wooden shape sorter toy and smacked me round the head with it. Even at barely 2 years old he was a strong lad.
I had a bad headache all day and spent the next two days feeling distinctly off.
Plastic toys are less likely to give me concussion.

All a complete waste of time and I think most people do it to be trendy and so they can post about it on Instagram.

That rainbow looks shit. My DS would not be one bit interested in it. Loves playmobile and Lego though so I will continue to buy it.

I'll also continue to go on holiday's, buy clothes from supermarkets and I might even have a 3rd child.

Because me not doing these means absolutely fuck all. The world won't change because this wee lassie from Scotland stops going to Majorca.

Wow it has been a good few years since I bought children’s toys so I had no idea what a grimes rainbow was.
Just googled it and at £60 for a toddler toy I am pretty glad mine grew up before they became a thing.
Some of these brands mentioned I have never heard of so again I googled. Who pays £39 for a metal drinks bottle when Wilko sells one for a fiver?

I am all for less plastic so I do what I can. Loose fruit and veg, no cling film, reuseable bags,solid shampoo and soap, laundry eggs and even the cats are back on tinned food as the pouches are not recycled my area.
But it seems a whole new industry has sprung up producing more goods for us to buy and we are sold the idea that we are better parents/more environmentally aware if we buy them. When the truth is we are just adding to the production of goods and more consumerism.

Oh and 25 years ago we had reusable wipes. We just called them a flannel.